5 Ways To Be Unsatisfied With Your Church

[Revmitchell]

1. Don’t participate, merely consume.

2. Criticize your leadership.

3.Don’t spend time with your church outside of the church building.

4. Believe that everything should be about you and for you, all the time.

5. Be unhappy with the fact that it isn’t perfect.

http://www.shaneblackshear.com/5-ways-to-be-unsatisfied-with-your-church/

 

[annsni]

But then when they leave, it's all the church's fault.

 

[Earth Wind and Fire]

But then when they leave, it's all the church's fault.

If its like a marriage then there should be a courtship ..... Id say at least a year & maybe more prior to joining. Nobody should be rushed into a marriage nor should they be rushed into joining a church until they understand the core values & the proclivities. Rushing into a marriage w/o totally understanding the spouse gives rise to divorce just as rushing into joining a church leads to leaving it because its not what you expected. Joining a church for church sake is incorrect.

And this was a FLUFF artificial that anyone could have written in 15 minutes.

 

[Revmitchell]

But then when they leave, it's all the church's fault.

Of course. .......

 

[Iconoclast]

Earth, Wind & Fire

If its like a marriage then there should be a courtship ..... Id say at least a year & maybe more prior to joining. Nobody should be rushed into a marriage nor should they be rushed into joining a church until they understand the core values & the proclivities.

Hello EWF,

At the risk of incurring you wrath starting off the new year....I need to ask you a question....and yet....I will not require an answer, just that you think it through.


Here you suggest taking a year to get to know a church and what they believe and yet in the year that has now past, you seemed to strenuously object when some of the churches wanted you to attend a new members study class....which you said was......"attending their indoctrination".

Have you modified your view since that time? it does not seem as if you can do both does it? This i would suggest is a standard mode of operation not indoctrination. They present to you where they stand.You present what parts you agree on,and where you differ understanding that you are not going to mesh on everything.

You do not have to respond...it was more for thought.

 

[agedman]

1. Don’t participate, merely consume.

2. Criticize your leadership.

3.Don’t spend time with your church outside of the church building.

4. Believe that everything should be about you and for you, all the time.

5. Be unhappy with the fact that it isn’t perfect.

http://www.shaneblackshear.com/5-ways-to-be-unsatisfied-with-your-church/

I would add when a person has outgrown the ministry of that assembly.

For instance: Often those who have gone to higher education training - in particular that which is offered by good Biblical universities - the person no longer can be sustained upon the milk of the word. They need meat in which another church may bring to the plate.

In that case, it is well and good that the person seek an assembly in which they may continue to grow.

This is in no way being critical of the other church, but practicing discernment of the spiritual needs of that person and even that person's family.

Some might suggest the person should stay and enhance the level of teaching in that assembly.

Unfortunately, when leadership is feeding milk to the assembly as a constant diet, the above suggestion doesn't work that way. Eventually, there will be a disagreement, there will be unity of one camp in contrast to another camp, and there will be a destruction of harmony.

The wise student of Scriptures will seek that area in which they may grow in wisdom and knowledge of the Scriptures - the meat - not the milk.

 

[Revmitchell]

I would add when a person has outgrown the ministry of that assembly.

For instance: Often those who have gone to higher education training - in particular that which is offered by good Biblical universities - the person no longer can be sustained upon the milk of the word. They need meat in which another church may bring to the plate.

In that case, it is well and good that the person seek an assembly in which they may continue to grow.

This is in no way being critical of the other church, but practicing discernment of the spiritual needs of that person and even that person's family.

Some might suggest the person should stay and enhance the level of teaching in that assembly.

Unfortunately, when leadership is feeding milk to the assembly as a constant diet, the above suggestion doesn't work that way. Eventually, there will be a disagreement, there will be unity of one camp in contrast to another camp, and there will be a destruction of harmony.

The wise student of Scriptures will seek that area in which they may grow in wisdom and knowledge of the Scriptures - the meat - not the milk.

This post is off topic but it doesn't surprise me that someone would bring up the idea that someone might be smarter than everyone else. Quite the elitist attitude.

 

[preacher4truth]

I would add when a person has outgrown the ministry of that assembly.

For instance: Often those who have gone to higher education training - in particular that which is offered by good Biblical universities - the person no longer can be sustained upon the milk of the word. They need meat in which another church may bring to the plate.

In that case, it is well and good that the person seek an assembly in which they may continue to grow.

This is in no way being critical of the other church, but practicing discernment of the spiritual needs of that person and even that person's family.

Some might suggest the person should stay and enhance the level of teaching in that assembly.

Unfortunately, when leadership is feeding milk to the assembly as a constant diet, the above suggestion doesn't work that way. Eventually, there will be a disagreement, there will be unity of one camp in contrast to another camp, and there will be a destruction of harmony.

The wise student of Scriptures will seek that area in which they may grow in wisdom and knowledge of the Scriptures - the meat - not the milk.

Excellent view and it is totally Scriptural, Hebrews 5:11ff. I see one has responded against this biblical view and in doing so is sowing discord. Nothing you said was elitist, it was and is Biblical and full of wisdom. :thumbs:

 

[quantumfaith]

I would add when a person has outgrown the ministry of that assembly.

For instance: Often those who have gone to higher education training - in particular that which is offered by good Biblical universities - the person no longer can be sustained upon the milk of the word. They need meat in which another church may bring to the plate.

In that case, it is well and good that the person seek an assembly in which they may continue to grow.

This is in no way being critical of the other church, but practicing discernment of the spiritual needs of that person and even that person's family.

Some might suggest the person should stay and enhance the level of teaching in that assembly.

Unfortunately, when leadership is feeding milk to the assembly as a constant diet, the above suggestion doesn't work that way. Eventually, there will be a disagreement, there will be unity of one camp in contrast to another camp, and there will be a destruction of harmony.

The wise student of Scriptures will seek that area in which they may grow in wisdom and knowledge of the Scriptures - the meat - not the milk.

I disagree completely. If one has become so informed and edumacated, then the expectation is that they would mature enough to be responsible for their own growth and development. Furthermore, they could provided leadership and guidance on how their current situation could more appropriately address such issues.

Sounds a lot like, "I have outgrown you, so I am going to take my marbles somewhere else".

 

[quantumfaith]

Excellent view and it is totally Scriptural, Hebrews 5:11ff. I see one has responded against this biblical view and in doing so is sowing discord. Nothing you said was elitist, it was and is Biblical and full of wisdom. :thumbs:

Your discord never ceases to amaze me. I bet you find it difficult finding a group of believers so mature and knowledgeable as yourself.

 

[Revmitchell]

Please let's not derail this thread with the off topic post.

 

[Iconoclast]

This post is off topic but it doesn't surprise me that someone would bring up the idea that someone might be smarter than everyone else. Quite the elitist attitude.

Does it have to be an "elitist"attitude? To find the middle ground in these two verses from romans 12 seems to require a judgement be made, with a corresponding action to follow. What do you think?

3 For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith.

not to think to highly of yourself means you can see others with a greater degree of gift,as well as a less gift

16 Be of the same mind one toward another. Mind not high things, but condescend to men of low estate. Be not wise in your own conceits.

something in the person give an indication...perhaps they cannot read or write...love demands that you make a judgement and seek to meet the need.....you do not judge to put them down, but to be able to supply what they lack.

 

[JonC]

This post is off topic but it doesn't surprise me that someone would bring up the idea that someone might be smarter than everyone else. Quite the elitist attitude.

I don’t know…he does have a point. I attended a church that adhered to superficial studies because they felt that a non-Christian guest or new believer would be more comfortable with “milk.” The idea is that these people wouldn’t come back if shoved into the “deep end.” Unfortunately there were no “deeper” studies offered as it was deemed ineffective based on the size of the church. I don’t think that this was an issue with preaching, but it was with adult and youth studies (although they did provide excellent opportunities for fellowship). I can understand someone needing to grow beyond what the church is willing to offer (keeping in mind that that person is also a part of that church). I can also understand the church’s need to teach in accord with the spiritual level of its members - but in a way to edify and facilitate the spiritual growth of its members. I don’t think agedman is necessarily demonstrating an “elitist attitude.” I’m not certain that this can merely be dismissed as a non-legitimate cause for dissatisfaction with one’s church.

 

[annsni]

I would add when a person has outgrown the ministry of that assembly.

For instance: Often those who have gone to higher education training - in particular that which is offered by good Biblical universities - the person no longer can be sustained upon the milk of the word. They need meat in which another church may bring to the plate.

In that case, it is well and good that the person seek an assembly in which they may continue to grow.

This is in no way being critical of the other church, but practicing discernment of the spiritual needs of that person and even that person's family.

Some might suggest the person should stay and enhance the level of teaching in that assembly.

Unfortunately, when leadership is feeding milk to the assembly as a constant diet, the above suggestion doesn't work that way. Eventually, there will be a disagreement, there will be unity of one camp in contrast to another camp, and there will be a destruction of harmony.

The wise student of Scriptures will seek that area in which they may grow in wisdom and knowledge of the Scriptures - the meat - not the milk.

Maybe this would be the time to step up and assist the ministry how ever the ministry needs. We've had numerous men step up and teach great, advanced, college level classes at our church and we're very much the richer for it. Why leave just because you got some book smarts? Is church only to consume or is to to be able to minister to the body using our gifts?

 

[JonC]

1. Don’t participate, merely consume.

3.Don’t spend time with your church outside of the church building.



http://www.shaneblackshear.com/5-ways-to-be-unsatisfied-with-your-church/

These are the ones that I see most. There is a consumer mentality when it comes to churches (if one doesn’t offer what you want, you can simply find another that may). I think that it cuts both ways, particularly when churches adopt a business model and are seeking offer what is being bought and grow their consumer base.

I think that spending time with one’s church is linked to the consumer attitude. People pay their money, watch the show and are good until the next week. Of course, perhaps our life-styles often interfere with actually being a church family. I normally do not see anyone from my church except in church (our lives do not typically cross outside of the church building).

 

[preacher4truth]

Does it have to be an "elitist"attitude? To find the middle ground in these two verses from romans 12 seems to require a judgement be made, with a corresponding action to follow. What do you think?

3 For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith.

not to think to highly of yourself means you can see others with a greater degree of gift,as well as a less gift

16 Be of the same mind one toward another. Mind not high things, but condescend to men of low estate. Be not wise in your own conceits.

something in the person give an indication...perhaps they cannot read or write...love demands that you make a judgement and seek to meet the need.....you do not judge to put them down, but to be able to supply what they lack.

:thumbs: :applause:

 

[preacher4truth]

I don’t know…he does have a point. I attended a church that adhered to superficial studies because they felt that a non-Christian guest or new believer would be more comfortable with “milk.” The idea is that these people wouldn’t come back if shoved into the “deep end.” Unfortunately there were no “deeper” studies offered as it was deemed ineffective based on the size of the church. I don’t think that this was an issue with preaching, but it was with adult and youth studies (although they did provide excellent opportunities for fellowship). I can understand someone needing to grow beyond what the church is willing to offer (keeping in mind that that person is also a part of that church). I can also understand the church’s need to teach in accord with the spiritual level of its members - but in a way to edify and facilitate the spiritual growth of its members. I don’t think agedman is necessarily demonstrating an “elitist attitude.” I’m not certain that this can merely be dismissed as a non-legitimate cause for dissatisfaction with one’s church.

Agreed. :thumbs: :applause:

 

[Iconoclast]

Maybe this would be the time to step up and assist the ministry how ever the ministry needs. We've had numerous men step up and teach great, advanced, college level classes at our church and we're very much the richer for it. Why leave just because you got some book smarts? Is church only to consume or is to to be able to minister to the body using our gifts?

:thumbsup::thumbsup:This is valid and needful:wavey:

 

[nodak]

JonC--agreed!

But then I am one of those who view the church as a voluntary organization for the propagation of the gospel.

Not as my family. I have one of those. Not as where I make all my friends. Hard to evangelize that way. Not as my chief means of contact with God or of worshiping Him. The veil was rent and He is available all the time everywhere. Isn't that why real Baptists have no altars?

So if the singing, the praying, and the preaching have ceased effectively propagating the gospel, and if there seems upon broaching that with leadership no propensity to move to doing so, I feel perfectly free to find where God IS working to bring folks to salvation and be a part of that fellowship.

Wish someone would write a post or article on "5 ways to run off your congregation."

 

[preacher4truth]

:thumbsup::thumbsup:This is valid and needful:wavey:

Sounds good. Unfortunately some do not want others teaching. There are modern day Diotrephes in some pulpits so it's not always that simple.