Forgiveness

Well, first of all, I don't worry about 'forgiving myself'. I haven't found myself sinning against myself! My sins are almost always in an attempt to please myself!

At the point that the Holy Spirit brings that to my attention, the idea is for me to go to the Lord for forgiveness. And that's pretty easy. It gets easier with time, too. I should be really good at it before I die!

And receiving forgiveness from God is a restoration of peace in my heart. That is not hard either! I am so grateful for that.

Forgiving others has to be practiced, for others can do pretty mean things and pretty painful things. For instance, I have been called a heretic by two people publicly on Baptist Board. That was really difficult for me, because my entire life's goal is that Christ should show Himself through me. Neither has asked for forgiveness or apologized at all. So the forgiveness which is FINALLY in my heart for them has nowhere to go! But at least it is ready and waiting.

To me, forgiving others means you don't want to be the instrument of punishment where they are concerned, or be part of the process of their 'consequences.' Whether or not I actually do find myself in one of those positions is up to God, but it is necessary that that is NOT the desire of my heart. The desire of my heart, where forgiveness is concerned, is that the person or persons who offended me be either introduced to or restored to a full relationship with our Lord. And also that I would respond to the reason that the Lord allowed the incident or words to happen in the first place, learning what He would have me learn in the humility of knowing that I probably deserved ever so much worse so many other times and never got anything at all negative those other times.

At the very worst, when we are victims of something clearly not deserved or asked for, such as murder in the family, or rape, or something similarly horrid, forgiveness comes really hard, but it has to come into our hearts if we are to let Christ's character shine through us for the world to see in that circumstance.

Forgiving does not mean forgetting. It does not mean a willingness to trust again. You can forgive a burgler but that does not make is requisite on you to hand the house keys to him! Forgiving simply means you are leaving it in God's and the law's hands regarding the person and clearing your own heart of bitterness. It means that if the person should ever approach you in repentance and sorrow for the act or words, that you will be able to fully accept that repentance and not hold anything against that person. They are cleared in your heart and in your mind.

And it always means that if you should see that particular person in need, you would be willing to help them.

 

By nature I tend to be a bit of a critic and try to find things that I disagree with, especially in discussion boards.

Saying that, Helen's post is probably the best short explanation on forgiveness that I have ever read. There is nothing in it which I would disagree.

 

Helen--
quote "It means that if the person should ever approach you in repentance and sorrow for the act or words, that you will be able to fully accept that repentance and not hold anything against that person. "unquote

This pretty much nails something people overlook in forgiveness. We alway focus on the passage in Matthew telling us to forgive.

Luke adds that repentence is necessary before we forgive.
Isn't this the same way it is with God?

He does not forgive those who deny they are sinners against Him or who refuse to ask for it.


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Luk 17:4 And if he sin against thee seven times in the day, and seven times turn again to thee, saying, I repent; thou shalt forgive him
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There is no such thing as unconditional forgiveness.

But to answer the question, it does not come easy to me.

MR

 

You rob a bank, TaterTot?????

 

I agree with tatertot. I can give forgiveness better than accept it. My wife sometimes calls me a doormat because I forgive so easily.

 

"Tonight we are looking for a person that goes by the name Tatertot on America's Most Wanted!!!"

 

Forgiveness is not that hard to me, unless it's something particularly heinous someone did.

I have more difficulty calling "feeling like I could forgive someone who isn't repentant about what they did" "forgiveness" than I do in the actual forgiving. Maybe "forgiveness" like "love" and "tolerance" and "unity" in today's world seems too broadly applied a term, like a cureall, when without repentance, it's just a warm fuzzy that doesn't last.

I mean, I have the "spirit of forgiveness" all the time, because I realize I'm usually one wrongly-turned phrase away from insulting someone accidentally myself, but it just doesn't feel right to call that just "forgiveness" before the other person repents. Maybe "potential forgiveness" or "spirit of forgiveness" it could be called. I just think "forgiveness" gets short shrift and gets thrown around like too many catch phrases these days....

 

I can usually forgive, but I admit there is one individual that I cannot truly forgive. I can say I have, I can even act like I have. But, then something will happen to show me that I have not forgiven that person. It is quite frustrating, especially when I read about or talk with someone that doesn't have this issue at all.

I guess I just need to keep trying and keep praying. It will come, one day.

 

James Bell,

I know what you mean about forgiveness being hard in some cases. That is when we must rely more on the Lord and remember His mercy toward us.

My youngest brother committed a robbery back in the 70's. I was accused of the crime and convicted and sentenced to prison.

Two weeks before my release, evidence was produced to prove my innocence. I was enraged. I wanted to kill my brother! When I got out, the Lord convicted my heart of the thought and showed me in His Word that He died for the sins of many, even though He was innocent.

I forgave my brother. I do not see him often. I can probably count on both hands the amount I have seen him in the last 5 years. But when we do see each other, we do not bring the subject up.

It was hard forgiving my brother, but God gives me strength and the mercies that are renewed each morning are reminders that we should forgive others and rely on Christ to help us to do so.