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The Pastor and Friendships/ Fellowship?

Discussion in 'Pastoral Ministries' started by Roy1, Sep 17, 2003.

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  1. Roy1

    Roy1 New Member

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    Where should the Pastor draw the line, if any, in regard to friendships/ fellowship within the church? Should he be a Lone Ranger, someone set apart from the congregation, or is he free to maintain friendships with whom he will? Has anyone any thoughts on the subject?
     
    #1 Roy1, Sep 17, 2003
  2. USN2Pulpit

    USN2Pulpit New Member

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    I think a pastor can have a couple of good friedns, as long as he's willing to go the extra mile to show that he cares for everyone.
     
    #2 USN2Pulpit, Sep 17, 2003
  3. Jim1999

    Jim1999 <img src =/Jim1999.jpg>

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    Over 57 years, it was always my policy to be friendly to all; familiar with none. Personal friendships are always dangerous in the parish setting.

    Cheers,

    Jim
     
    #3 Jim1999, Sep 17, 2003
  4. Pastorba

    Pastorba New Member

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    Some will disagree with me, but I think it is ok for a pastor to have some close friends within the church. Pastoring is very lonely. Especially if you aren't close to many other pastors to have fellowship with. If the pastor doesn't have friends in the church, where is he supposed to find them?

    One caution. I agree with USN2Pulpit, you must show everyone you love them equally. And I would add that when you grow into these close realtionships it hurts tremendously when they fall away from the Lord! Of course it hurts when any of your congregation does, but by nature of your close relationship it will be the end of your friendship if they do fall away.
     
    #4 Pastorba, Sep 17, 2003
  5. gb93433

    gb93433 Active Member
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    The people I have been discipling have always been the people I am closest with. If I am going to pour my life into someone then I must share with them who I am and be transparent. But I am stil the leader which means they will lean on me for help.

    Jesus poured His life into a few and sepent the bulk of his time with a few.

    I like what a friend of mine said, "Love many, trust few, and paddle your own canoe."
     
    #5 gb93433, Sep 17, 2003
  6. j_barner2000

    j_barner2000 Member

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    We were designed by God to seek and, I would venture to say, need at least one or two close relationships. Our spouse is to be a very close relationship as is the one with our Lord... but I think we also need at least one other that we can bare our soul to. No matter how close you are to God or your spouse, you need another man who you can trust to share issues with...
     
    #6 j_barner2000, Sep 17, 2003
  7. Roy1

    Roy1 New Member

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    Thanks so far,
    There are some good thoughts, especially gb93433, I like what a friend of mine said, "Love many, trust few, and paddle your own canoe."

    The pastorate can be a lonely place at times especially when there no pastors near to have fellowship with. Can we effectively pastor people that we do not know? If we are to be disciples, discipling as gb93433 said it is pouring ourselves into others. A statement just this past week I was sharing with the adult bible class. I understand that we cannot bare our souls to everyone and even with those we are close to; there must be a measure of pastoral confidentiality.

    Care for the flock of God is paramount.
     
    #7 Roy1, Sep 17, 2003
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