HOW do you discuss human sexuality

This thread is asking about the WAY in which believers should approach the matters of human sexuality either in individual discussions, group discussions, as a teacher to students, or a preacher to congregation.

As one teaches/preaches through various Scriptures that actually are rather graphic, is there a time to be just as graphic and explicit, or when reading the passages, move on to another area?

Again, this thread is not a discussion of human sexuality, but what methods and what delicacies (relating to the expressions and terms) one takes when addressing the matter(s) to an audience of all ages, and to individuals who come to inquire.

For example: When teaching through the 5 books of Moses and approaching such passages as Deuteronomy 22 and 27, Leviticus 18 and 20, how would one suggest that the passages be explained to a congregation of mixed ages, or does one separate out the children, and if so what age? Or do you leave it up to the parents to determine while not knowing just how you are going to discuss these passages or how graphic you will become? Or, perhaps one just blunders along considering that the maturity level will allow or not allow certain levels of communication?

Is there danger(s) in discussing or not discussing human sexuality with the congregation or Sunday school? How does one lay out not only the warnings dealing with the negative sides, but encouraging the attributes of the positive side?

Again, (for the third time) this thread is NOT about human sexuality, it is about the WAY the topic should be taught, the dangers, the techniques, the audience, and so forth.

Please, let us all be careful with this topic, and approach it respectful of the forum rules.

agedman said:

Is there danger(s) in discussing or not discussing human sexuality with the congregation or Sunday school? How does one lay out not only the warnings dealing with the negative sides, but encouraging the attributes of the positive side?

Click to expand...

In terms of graded adult classes and older youth, I think you just give a brief warning about some of the elements to be discussed and then wade into the subject. The Bible is a book for adults, and it is important for adults and teenagers who know the facts of life to hear the wisdom of God and the saints of old.

For children, I think it is important to put things in terms of their level of understanding. You certainly wouldn't want to cover some of the rough stuff in the prophets (for instance Ezekiel 23, especially verses 20-21), or the story of Tamar (Genesis 38).

The mass media is pumping out culture full of misguided and evil values and perspectives. The church cannot afford to be silent in a blind adherence to Victorian prudishness. If you actually talk to teenagers honestly and answer uncomfortable questions matter-of-factly, they will respond with the deeper questions that they have been led to believe that churches don't have answers for. Teenagers have been exposed to much more than many of us even back 20-30 years ago and they need to hear the Divine plan for fulfilling sexuality and personal morality beyond just saying "Don't do it" like I was told at their age. It is about honoring oneself and honoring God through choices about how to live life. It is about discipleship and learning to be better than your urges. It is about understanding that urges are often healthy, but they do not control one's actions.

How do I discuss it?

- Gently, we live in a society where the vast majority of people we discuss it with will have never heard the completel Christian perspective.

- Graciously, in the context where I serve, 90% of adults under the age of 40 will have had sex before marriage. Grace and forgiveness must be our first step and judgment has no place.

- Honestly, authentically admitting our own failures but holding to the biblical testimony of fidelity and purity as God's first steps in this area.

- Biblically, never deviating from the Bible's testimony even when the people God has used to accomplish His work have failed.

- Restorative, sexual sin always leads to isolation and shame, our priority as Christians is to restore those who have fallen and hold onto them as they seek forgiveness.

I don't know if that works for everyone but it has worked for my ministry.