modesty?

Are you asking what things we as men might find "distracting"?

 

I think that it would be eye opening for dads to go clothes shopping with their daughters. We have a man in our church that has a beautiful daughter who is a senior in high school - he takes her shopping for all of her clothes. She dresses much different from the rest of society because her dad has taught her to be mindful of how she presents herself, as a testimony for the Lord, to the dark world in which she lives.

Jennifer

 

If she can feel a breeze against her skin anywhere between her neck and her knees she needs to put more clothes on.

 

Bro. James,

As we say in the South, "THAT'LL PREACH!!"

 

Izzaksdad...this is a message we DESPERATELY need to hear preached IN OUR CHURCHES in this day and age.It's getting where now even in church you have to be careful where you AIM your eyes.Know what I mean???

Greg Sr.

 

What about her arms

 

Actually, although I think modesty is a topic that does need to be addressed, I honestly think over-addressing it can be a problem too. Also I think we sometimes run the risk of over-reacting to a problem. Now, I'm not saying that we're doing that here, but I think that if you constantly hear in youth group or church legalistic modesty diatribes it ends up almost being an incentive for some youth to rebel against what may be a good and even biblical stance on an issue. Now... another thing that we have to remember is that not all men are "sex-mongers" and that any time we see skin the first thing thought to cross our mind is sexual. We also need to be realistic enough to realize that some guy definately do have a reaction like that. Another thing that we have to be realistic about is that "skin" isn't the only thing that can cause a man to lust. Honestly, a pretty face and a nice personality may be enough to push some guys over the edge (interestingly enough a lot of skin may not be a "turn on" to these same guys). Does this mean then that all Christian women should wear birkas, like in some fundamentalist Moslem cultures? I don't think so. What we need to realize is that modesty is an issue with very few firm lines... I'm not denying that there are lines we shouldn't cross, its just a lot harder to draw them than in some other cases. What we need to realize then is that if we are truly Christians we ought not be asking ourselves how far can we go, but rather put our focus on God. I wish I could give a clear answer about what exactly is OK and what's not as far as clothing... I wish it were as simple as no skin between the neck and knees, and in all honesty thats good advice to follow... but I humbly disagree in that I don't think its a necessarily a necessity.

One more thing... who says that girls don't battle with lust. In all honesty, I think sometimes that we turn lust, or a wandering eye into a primarily male problem. Look, I'm a guy, so I can't exactly talk from my own personal experience on this, but I really think that Girls struggle with lust too. Girls, you know that guy you think is really cute and you think about all the time?... The one who's name you may have written down all over your school notebooks, or the poster of the movie start you've got hanging on your wall at home?... Anyways, just a warning before talking about lust as a male, or even primarily male experience.

Best wishes to all
Burlgewood

 

Ohhh, I could scream! I had a bit typed and my computer froze! So now I get to type it again!
I have a conviction about wearing dresses/skirts. (Is say conviction because God convicted me about it.) I'd been saved about a year and had started cleaning my church. I always wore a dress to clean in, even though there was no one there but me. No one ever said to do this, no one ever said I was immodest before this. But God got ahold of my heart. If I dressed in what I considered modest at church, why not the rest of the week? I gave it to God, and started wearing dresses, but with school approaching I begain to worry. "What will they think?" I kept asking myself. And one morning while reading the Bible God spoke to my heart. It was as if the Holy Spirit said "Abby, which is more important? What I think, or what people think?" Well that settled it for good.
Now I'm happy with how I dress, I'm not emberrised, or worried, and I feel more like a lady.
People used to ask me "Are you going to start preaching about how we should dress?" Well NO! It's not my place. I'm not the pastor or the Holy Spirit. If God can speak to me about it, He can certianly speak to others without me opening my big mouth. (and it's a big one alright!) I have never told anyone how they should dress.
Now if a preacher wants to preach on standards, I'll be the first to shout him on. Praise God, go right ahead, because in this world today there needs to be some sort of guideline. (If you don't believe me, visit the mall and pay real close attention! )
I'm not saying tell the world how to dress. They don't understand. They won't untill they get saved, and I don't believe that God expects the unsaved to follow standards of the saved. You can't follow the Spirit untill you've got the Spirit.
I also believe that a Christian won't be (or shouldn't be) angrey about standards of any kind the church holds to. If they can back em up with the Bible, there should be no problem.
I have a list I made out for myself when I go shopping for clothes. I'll share it with ya'll, but before I do, please, please, PLEASE realize I'm not saying you have to follow this, or that I'm right on everything listed, this is just what I feel comfortable doing, and if in some way it could be a blessing to another Christian young lady, then praise God.

~skirts/dresses at least 3 inches past knee
~shirts no lower than 3 finger widths from collar bone
~no frontless, backless, anythingless clothing
~slits in skirts/dresses no longer than three or four inches
~no pants,shorts,tanktops,tubetops,swimsuits
~nothing see thru
~if it leaves room for the imagination then no
~nothing tight

This is my guideline, and many times I can't find things that fall in line with this...that's when I get out the sewing machine (which is a really wonderful thing once I realized that I needed to stop the pedel once the needle got to my fingers! ) and fix it.
BTW, if any of you young ladies have any other guidelines for clothes shopping, please share them with me!
~Because of the blood,
Miss Abby

 

Wow Kate, thanks for the link! This lady has got some great stuff! AMEN!

 

I must agree with my brethern above, ladies should help us men out! ....

 

But a woman can't really do much about her 'pretty face' or nice personality. On the other hand, modesty is certainly something every woman has the power to control.

Julia

 

www.barlowgirl.net

that is another site yall may want to check out

 

Loose enough enough to know you are a lady and tight enough to know you are a woman.

 

Hi all I am 17 and I want guys to know that I have a brain and that I am able to be more than something to look at. I watch what I wear b/c I want them to see me for who I am and not what my body is. I feel when you dress that way you lessen your self.
Kristen

 

Welcome to the BB, Kristen! I hope you stick around, we have a lot of fun.

-Alycia