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Are most of you stay at home wives and mothers?

Discussion in '2000-02 Archive' started by Molly, Mar 1, 2002.

  1. ForYourGlory

    ForYourGlory Member

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    Thanks SuekieLyn for your encouragement :D !! I am getting better at handling the comments made to me. I just have a hard time when people do not think that you have a right to say that you may have had a hard day. Sometimes they treat me like I live on some other planet. What is really hard is that there are fewer and fewer stay-at-home moms out there who can identify with me, and at my church I can only think of one or two and they are not in my age group. But like I said before I do feel this is where I am supposed to be and my family needs me more right now than the working world does. Thanks again for the encouragement!!
    God Bless,
    ForYourGlory

    P.S.
    Just got back from the doctor and my daughter has an ear infection. He put her on an antibiotic. Hopefully she we be getting back to herself real soon here.
     
  2. Kellisa

    Kellisa New Member

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    I have a great respect for women who stay home to take care of thier family. I admire them so much for being so selfless and serving Christ rather than the world (if that is indeed why they are staying home). I am working right now, but I plan to stay home after I have children. I would be happy staying home now without children, but I think my husband wants me working. It is difficult sometimes to get everything done when you are working a 40 hour week even without children. I can think of so many things I could be doing if I were at home during the day. I love to sew, cook, clean, do crafts, visit people, all kinds of things. I think a lot of things get overlooked in the church because so many women are out working in the world rather than focusing on God's work. Seems like there is always someone in the congregation that needs a hand, whether it be visiting the elderly, making lunch for a family, maybe helping a mother who might be sick care for her kids, who knows? I pray that someday I can be a stay at home mom and once my children are gone I hope I can still be home full time to better take care of my husband. It was God's design for the family and nothing will replace it. To those that get discouraged by other women who may be working and look down upon you, just remember who you are serving and that you are of utmost importance to your family even if they don't always show it. There is nothing better in the world than security in the home, and a stay at home mom or wife can provide that for her family.
     
  3. Rosa

    Rosa New Member

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    I am a stay at home wife. My kids are grown but I have a grandbaby now that I keep two days a week while my daughter goes to college.
    I don't watch TV unless you count the quilting show that comes on HGTV in the morning. EWWW and I don't like bonbons. [​IMG] Other forms of chocolate are wonderful though. In the summer I garden and in the winter I quilt. This year because John is so small I may quilt more this summer.
    I have not worked except for three years after my kids got out of high school. I decided that I did not like it and I could not keep my ironing up so I just stay at home. BTW...ironing is my favorite household activity. That makes me strange but I can't help myself. ;)
     
  4. ForYourGlory

    ForYourGlory Member

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    Amen to you Rosa. I too do not watch much on t.v. if I do it is Christian television. Can't say that I love to iron, but I do love washing dishes by hand. As a matter of fact my daughter came up to me the other day and said "Mommy you need a dishwasher." My reply to her was "No, I do some of my best thinking and praising with God when I'm washing the dishes." I don't know why, I just start washing and looking out the window and look around and think "WOW, God you are so awesome and good I can't thank you enough for what you do for me and my family, and just look at the beauty that you provide for us to see each and every day." GOD IS SO GOOD! :D
    God bless,
    ForYourGlory
     
  5. SAVED4LIFE

    SAVED4LIFE New Member

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    It seems as though most of you are stay-at-home moms. I have been both a stay-at-home-mom and a working mom. Currently, I am in the "working mom" category. A lot of you state in your posts that you are doing the "right" thing and "what God wants women to do". I think women should not judge other women for the choices they make regarding working or not working. When I stayed at home, I got the same "feeling" from my working friends that they thought I had it made and didn't do anything, and now that I'm working again, I hear comments that make it sound as though working mothers are selfish and putting thier careers and money before their family. I for one, am working BECAUSE I have to. Trust me, if I could stay home again, I would. I don't have that option. It's not because we can't make it on my husbands income, because we have before. I work because my husband expects me to. It may not be how God intended it, but that's just how it is for some women. I don't think my children are getting any less from me by me working. I make an extra effort to spend quality time with my children and my husband and I have an understanding that if he expects me to work outside the home, I expect him to help with the work inside the home.
     
  6. Gina B

    Gina B Active Member

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    I worked until the last weeks before I had my first daughter, and I've stayed home with all three since. Yes, I did it because I thought it was the right thing to do. [​IMG]
    My youngest starts school in August, and also I recently found out we'll most likely have to move next year, so out of necessity I'll again be working. Looking back now, I'm not even sure how we made it this far, lolol! It does give me faith that He's going to provide and we will make it through the next years though. [​IMG]
    Saved4life, I'm not pickin' a fight here, but nobody can tell me that my kids wouldn't be better off if I was going to be able to spend more time with them in the future, no matter what the "quality". Hopefully all the time I spend with my kids is quality regardless.
    Gina
     
  7. javalady

    javalady New Member

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  8. Gina B

    Gina B Active Member

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    " Any woman who condemns a woman for staying at home to minister to her family has a very worldly mindset, and shouldn't even be listened to. "

    It's done to single moms every single day by fellow church members and pastors. You're damned for staying home and being lazy, you're damned for going to work and leaving your kids. >shrug<
    At first it's confusing, then you learn to laugh it off, then you just get ticked and leave. [​IMG] I'm startin' to figure out why the Baptists have such a low rate of single moms...they aren't any holier or anything...they RUN 'EM OFF SCREAMING!
    Gina
     
  9. spiritofsal

    spiritofsal New Member

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    Hi Molly, I am a stay at home mom too. Not by choice though. I used to work in management until a car accident changed my life. I now have chronic anxiety which has left me disabled. I am married and have a seventeen year old daughter. So my days can be very busy, as you can imagine. I figured it was God's will that the accident happened as I am a firm believer in fate. I was raised with religion, but was never religious if you know what I mean. This past year has brought me closer to God, and He has given me much more than I could ever have dreamed of.
     
  10. Margie Kritzer

    Margie Kritzer <img src =/Margie.gif>

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    I have received criticism for my choice, but I have no guilt about being a working mom. I have had the one steady income, though modest, that has supported me during and between marriages. I expect that after this baby is born in July, I will return to work in September. Admittedly, my life would be easier to manage if I stayed home, but I have a calling, too. My husband has the flexible schedule and he stays home when needs arise.

    I appreciate Hollyberry's posting regarding her daughter's upbringing. As for me, I don't see myself as living outside of God's word. I had attempted to stay at home ten years ago, and within two months we became heavily in debt...we were renters, living in an old farmhouse, hardly living beyond our means! It was awfully stressful and my ex-husband wasn't happy.

    This way I am self-sufficient and available, and I have chosen an occupation that places me out of the home at the same time as my child. God has blessed me with a successful and comfortable career. Both the stay-at-home wives AND the working wives may be living out what God has planned for them. We should all celebrate the gifts we're given!
     
  11. Molly

    Molly New Member

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    I really don't see the controversial side of this issue. The bible is very clear on the role of the woman and the priorities she should have....to say she could never work is not in the bible,but it is clear that her husband,children,and home is to be the priority,I could see that happening with a part time job *maybe*,but how could a woman be doing that working outside the home full time. I'm not here to point a finger,but we all should self examine our lives,to see if we are doing what we are supposed to...I examine myself daily...Is my husnabd the priority relationship,are my children taken care of,loved taught God' Word at home,is my home well kept,clean and chores done before family gets home? Now,I will say the answer to this could be no,even though I am a stay at home wife amd mother,but I always make it my goal,and I try to not let anything come before those things....even moms that stay home can find things to occupy their time away from those priorties,like service organizations,church work,etc....We just have to make sure those are the priorites of our lives. Anything that comes in front og those things can and should be removed.
     
  12. SAVED4LIFE

    SAVED4LIFE New Member

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    Molly,

    The controversial side of this conversation is that some women don't have the same opportunity to stay at home with their children as you obviously do. As I stated in my earlier post, yes, I would like to stay home with my children, but I don't have that option. I can't go to my husband and read him a Bible verse, and quit my job. No, it's not easy to work 40 hours a week, keep a clean home, spend time with the kids, groceries, and the list goes on, but I do it. It's wasn't easy getting everything done when I didn't work either. I feel I am doing what the Bible says about the role of a woman, I'm doing that and then some! [​IMG]

    I have prayed about my working situation. My marriage isn't all it should be right now for one thing, and I never know from one week to the next, if I'm going to remain married for long. I can't quit my job and have no income to support myself and my children when my future is so foggy. My kids need me financially as well as emotionally and physically right now. When and if that ever changes, then perhaps God will open other doors for me.
     
  13. ForYourGlory

    ForYourGlory Member

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    SAVED4LIFE,

    My heart goes out to you. I'm sorry :( . As I stated in my first reply I understand that some women have to work and some perfer to work. I would never point any wrong fingers at any women in the situation that you are in. I will pray for you, and I'm not saying that just to say that...I will! I had a friend of mine at church last night tell me that she just does not know what to do, she wants to quit working but they can not do it due to financial circumstances right now. I told her that she needs to give it to the Lord, and if it is meant to be and His will that it will happen in His time. I know it sounds so easy for me to say, but God really presses it on my heart to talk to women about this and to let them know that they are not alone. Keep your chin up, keep looking at Him, keep praying and He will be there for you. Just know that you are LOVED!!
    God bless,
    ForYourGlory
     
  14. SAVED4LIFE

    SAVED4LIFE New Member

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    FYG,

    Thank you very much for your prayers. I need them. I know I probably sound "bitter" in my posts, maybe I am. I guess I just want to make sure that people understand WHY some women work. It's not always the career-oreinted, me me me types that work. Some of us are in unusual circumstances that can't be stereotyped into the "selfish" category.

    All of you who read this, I hope you will be praying for me and my family as well. Thanks!
     
  15. Rev. Joshua

    Rev. Joshua <img src=/cjv.jpg>

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    I would like to throw in that some women feel as called to their work as others are to working in the home.

    When we found out we were going to be parents, we prayerfully took a careful inventory of our skills and goals. There is no way my wife can practice medicine from home. I on the other hand, can continue to do bi-vocational clergy work while staying at home. Writing, preparing sermons, and pastoral care are all things that (for me) take place in the evenings.

    In addition, my wife was born to be a professional. More than a few hours at home drives her crazy. I come from a large family, and by experience and personal inclination am more nurturing, affectionate, and patient. It makes sense for her to work and me to stay at home; and it's worked out very well.

    There is no single template that will fit all Christian families. The secret is making God's will the center of the family plan, and allowing each person to use their particular gifts in the ways that most benefit the family.

    Joshua
     
  16. Molly

    Molly New Member

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    Savedforlife(love that name,by the way). I will pray for you,your marriage and your children,it sounds like you are in a difficult situation,I pray God's peace in the situation and that God's will would be done in your marriage. I,also understand your situation and by no means am critizizing you,but am wanting to exhort and challenge you....I know God knows your heart and it sounds like you are doing what you have to do for now. I will pray for your husband,is he a believer?
    Rev Joseph-I'm proud that you have worked all that out to your liking,but the Bible says the women are to be the homekeepers...I believe he gave that role to women for very specific reasons. I understand your situation is unique,but I still can't say that is God's ideal plan for your family....
     
  17. Molly

    Molly New Member

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    Ooops,I mean Joshua. Sorry about the name.
     
  18. JTRamsey4

    JTRamsey4 Guest

    Hello all,
    I am new to the site. I am also at home wife and mother. I have been home since I was married 7 yrs ago. My children are 6 and 4. There was a time when I had to go back to work when my children were 4 and 2 for financial reasons. I worked for a year then my husband and myself decided that it was best for me to come home again for good. I have been home ever since and loving every minute of it! I know this is the Lords will for us.

    Love in Christ,
    Mrs. Ramsey
     
  19. Joy

    Joy New Member

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    Joy here! It's good to back with you, Ladies. I had a wonderful time of fellowship with my parents here for a week. We got loads done on our basement renovations! Now I've just got to recover from the grandparents visiting! :eek: :D

    I am a stay at home mother by conviction. I have been teaching women the Titus 2 lifestyle for several years now, and have been doing some study and research on the original Greek context as well as the historical context and context of the entire Word of God on the subject, with hopes of writing my own book on it.

    There is no way this passage can mean anything than what it says, and according to the entire context of the whole Bible, I believe that God intended ladies to be wives and mothers and in their homes. This is a difficult subject to speak about, because of the feminist movement, and years of humanism has crept into our churches has corrupted the thought patterns and tender consciences of Christian ladies everywhere.

    Earlier, Gina mentioned being "damned if you do, and damned if you don't," and it is the same way when a lady is asked what she believes on the subject. No matter what your answer, there will be a good lady somewhere, somehow, that you will offend. It certainly isn't my intent to look down on good ladies that don't agree with my convictions. Though I believe them very strongly, and believe it is also my duty to teach the Word of God, it is my desire to do so with love and with grace, and to allow the Holy Spirit to do the life changing, not me. ;)
     
  20. Margie Kritzer

    Margie Kritzer <img src =/Margie.gif>

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    Thank you, I wish this were true.
    Here we go.
    This is a tired, tired subject. It has been challenged before and will be challenged again. I think that anyone wanting to delve into this for the first time should read:

    A Look At Keepers At Home

    While one may be motivated to provide a particular look at certain scripture, I feel a need to keep the WORKING but "OTHERWISE" GOOD ladies from being RUN ('EM) OFF SCREAMING.

    Sorry, no smilies. God bless all the ladies who are doing God's will, inside or outside the home.

    [ March 07, 2002, 07:34 PM: Message edited by: Margie Kritzer ]
     
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