Verses that Make You Laugh.

I heard the ladies at work discussing the best artificial sweetner. I told them that Jesus has a favorite. It's sweet and low. Of course they said, "Wha??" Now I know it's not a verse out of the Bible, but, I did read it in a verse out of the hymnal.

"There's within my heart a melody, Jesus whispers sweet and low. "

 

I don't like flying and I think this verse in the Bible proves that I shouldn't.

"Lo, I will be with thee always."

 

The cabbie in me grins at 2 Kings 9:20. "The lookout reported, "He has reached them, but he isn't coming back either. The driving is like that of Jehu son of Nimshi--he drives like a madman."

I always remember the last sentence of Leviticus 3:16 when I think about going on a diet. "All the fat is the Lord's.

I can almost hear the grin on Elijah when he told off the prophets of Baal on Mt Carmel 1 Kings 18:27. "Shout louder!" he said. "Surely he is a god! Perhaps he is deep in thought, or busy, or traveling. Maybe he is sleeping and must be awakened."

Final one for this post. After events with Mordecai, I am sure "Haman" means "LOSER" in at least one language on the planet

Pete

 

I use this one to comfort my hairline challenged friends!

 

Clint, good idea, just don't tell them "Go on up, you baldhead!"

Pete

 

Two verses I read to the teens at church when they pick on me like Kelly does about my increasing lack of hair:

"And he went up from thence unto Bethel: and as he was going up by the way, there came forth little children out of the city, and mocked him, and said unto him, Go up, thou bald head; go up, thou bald head. And he turned back, and looked on them, and cursed them in the name of the Lord. And there came forth two she bears out of the wood, and tare forty and two children of them."

2 Kings 2:22-24

 

John 11:39 KJV
Jesus said, Take ye away the stone. Martha, the sister of him that was dead, saith unto him, Lord, by this time he stinketh: for he hath been dead four days.

 

Kelly said: It sounds like we need to start a support group for bald and balding men.

LOL! That's is funny!

A verse that makes me laugh??? Never thought about it. This one thrills my heart tho.

 

This one makes me laugh..I can just see the disciples.."They're gonna try to kill you Jesus" and Jesus says "Are there not twelve hours of daylight?"

7Then he said to his disciples, "Let us go back to Judea."
8"But Rabbi," they said, "a short while ago the Jews tried to stone you, and yet you are going back there?"
9Jesus answered, "Are there not twelve hours of daylight? A man who walks by day will not stumble, for he sees by this world's light." John 11:1-9

 

Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath;
James 1:19

The verse, in itself, is not funny. But I still chuckle because a lot of people act like the verse reads: "slow to hear, swift to speak, swift to wrath."

 

1 Samuel 3:1-8

I can just imagine Eli thinking the frist two times after Samuel left, "Crazy Kid must be hearing things!"

 

How about a support ministry for them? I had two sets of surgery restore my hairline, more or less. Now I'm out of money when it would take only one more procedure to eliminate all the baldness on top and on the crown! Aaaaauuuuuggggghhhhhh!!!!

As for funny verses, I prefer the classic trio:

"Judas went and hanged himself."
"Go, and do thou likewise."
"What thou doest, do quickly."