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Understanding the Will of God

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by intojesus, Sep 27, 2005.

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  1. intojesus

    intojesus New Member

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    Hello,

    I am struggling with trying to understand the will of God. I have a brother whom I love with all my heart. He is in his last year of college, completely sold out for Jesus, a young man with a tender heart. I will call him Mike. Mike is also a VERY VERY good-looking young man. I am not saying this because I am his sister. He really is. He has had women of all ages pursue him hard. Mike has never given these women a second look. He was waiting for Gods perfect timing. Mike even belives he may be being called into ministry of some sort. Mike has also kept himself pure. This may be hard to believe but he really has. He wanted to honor God with his body and also remain pure for his wedding night. Here is why I am struggling. There was a women I will call Pam that has a 4 year old daughter that pursed Mike the hardest. She has never been married and is a new Christian. Her life has been tough and she has made many wrong choices. She is also about 5 years older than my brother. In the beginning she was persistant and really pushing hard to be with my brother. He said he could never be interested. She was pretty obvious. Now Pam is a Christian and I do like her. Her past sins are forgiven. Recently she bought my brother a Bible and he was very moved. And right after that my brother began to date her. He kept the fact hidden at first. He struggled terribly but feels God has changed his heart on how he feels about this women. I guess I just don't understand this. He was so against this in the beginning and even went through a lot of hard times because of the way this women pursued him but now God changed his heart??? She has never been married so he won't be enter a marriage with a divorced women. Again this women is sweet and I like her but I just don't understand the will of God. My brother had kept himself pure through temptaion after temptaion. I can tell you this, my brother would not date this women without the intention of marraige, especially since she has a child. He is that kind of man. Can I hear your thoughts please and please pray for me that I will just trust God in this matter.
     
    #1 intojesus, Sep 27, 2005
  2. webdog

    webdog Active Member
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    I believe your brother did the right thing in remaining pure. What you describe is "man's will" vs. God's will. There are some areas we will never know God's will in, but Scripture is clear on others. Is what your brother's view and the Bible's view and requirements on marriage the same? Pam, having been saved, has had her past washed clean under the Blood of Christ. Your brother will not be unequally "yoked" with this woman. I believe God opened your brother's eyes and heart, and changed "his" will to coincide with God's.

    There is a book I read last year "Decisions by the Book" I would recommend reading. I can't recall the author's name, maybe another poster can give it, but if you do a search of the title somewhere, you will find it. It's an excellent book.
     
    #2 webdog, Sep 27, 2005
  3. buckster75

    buckster75 Member

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    would you feel any different if this woman had, instead of having the baby, had an abortion and never told anyone? The fact of past mistakes does not enter. We are told to forgive as God forgives. But you already know that. Let me know if I can help. I will pray for you, Mike and Pam.
     
    #3 buckster75, Sep 27, 2005
  4. TexasSky

    TexasSky Guest

    Into Jesus,

    I know that you are only asking this because you love your brother, so please don't take what I am about to say as mean spirited or critical. This is just not your business.

    Only God and your brother should be involved in deciding what God's will is. Your role is to love and support your brother, whatever happens.

    Pam has been forgiven for her past by God. We, as humans, should not judge those who God has already forgiven. We are not above God.

    So, if God leads your brother into marriage, or if God leads him away from marriage - it should be a decision influenced by God and prayer, not by well-meaning loved ones.
     
    #4 TexasSky, Sep 27, 2005
  5. intojesus

    intojesus New Member

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    I promise you I do not hold it against this women. I myself have my own past share of sin. What bothers me about this was my brother was very upset by this womens actions in the beginning. She chased him. Even would find places he was and go there. This was not simple flirtation. This was viewed by many even to the point that it had to be mentioned to her. My brother was very upset by this womens advances. Thats what makes me so confused by all of this. I will love and respect my brother by whatever choice he makes. I guess I just fear for his young age and the fact he has just come out of a 2 year relationship and it has only been 3 months. THe relationship he was in was a godly one but he felt like the Lord had led him out of it. Hes my baby brother and big sister mode is kicking in. I just didn't understand how God was i all of this but I do need to butt out. Thanks.
     
    #5 intojesus, Sep 27, 2005
  6. Helen

    Helen <img src =/Helen2.gif>

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    Perhaps your brother is maturing spiritually. God teaches all of us all the time.
     
    #6 Helen, Sep 27, 2005
  7. buckster75

    buckster75 Member

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    1 Corinthians 14:12Even so ye, forasmuch as ye are zealous of spiritual gifts, seek that ye may excel to the edifying of the church.

    Ephesians 4:11And he gave some, apostles; and some, prophets; and some, evangelists; and some, pastors and teachers; 12For the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ:

    I always though that we can help each other to discover what God wants us to do.
     
    #7 buckster75, Sep 27, 2005
  8. TexasSky

    TexasSky Guest

    Buckster75,

    I think we can all pray for one another, but I don't think we can help people discover God's will for that person's life.

    Remember that even Christ was ridiculed in His own lands, and doubted, even though He worked miracles and taught scriptures others knew.

    How many ministers would not preach if they listened to well meaning people who told them that they thought God could use them somewhere else or that it doesn't pay or that they have "other talents" they should use.

    Some things have to be personal between people and God, and surely selecting your life-mate is between an individual and God.
     
    #8 TexasSky, Sep 27, 2005
  9. buckster75

    buckster75 Member

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    Sky,what are you doing with these verses I posted?
    I might also disagree with letting someone go there own way, when it is so clearly wrong (not saying this is the case here), no matter what it is. That is called discernment.

    [ September 27, 2005, 05:26 PM: Message edited by: buckster75 ]
     
    #9 buckster75, Sep 27, 2005
  10. buckster75

    buckster75 Member

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    Sky, not sure why you put this "Remember that even Christ was ridiculed in His own lands, and doubted, even though He worked miracles and taught scriptures others knew. "

    and I hope by this "How many ministers would not preach if they listened to well meaning people who told them that they thought God could use them somewhere else or that it doesn't pay or that they have "other talents" they should use." you don't mean people are preaching because it pays money.(because my ministry is costing me financilly big time(don't take that as a complaint))I would be happy for a person to come and tell me they sincerely think that God could use me better in something other than preaching.I would not be in this if I did not get confirmation that I did indeed have the spititual gifts
    Paul talked about from strong discering christians.(along with God's call)
     
    #10 buckster75, Sep 27, 2005
  11. buckster75

    buckster75 Member

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    intojesus

    don't take what I said as telling you to butt out. I am saying if you can help your brother finding God's will, do it. But I want you to see the other person as God does so you can "clearly" help him.
     
    #11 buckster75, Sep 27, 2005
  12. TexasSky

    TexasSky Guest

    Buckster75,

    I don't think edifying the church means "telling someone else what God's will is for their life."

    I put what I wrote about good people in Christ's age not recognizing Christ because good people may know God's will for THEIR life, but not for others. There may be a few with discernment who can guide others in His will for their life, but I seriously, SERIOUSLY doubt that the average church attendee can tell anyone else what God wants in the other person's life.

    No one but God and that person knows the person's heart.

    Look at just a few cases in the bible.
    Job's friends all thought they had the answers to Job's problems. God was angry at the friends for what they told Job.

    Would any human have suggested Hosea marry the woman he married?
     
    #12 TexasSky, Sep 27, 2005
  13. buckster75

    buckster75 Member

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    did any of the OT dudes have the spirit that raised Christ from the dead indwelling them?
     
    #13 buckster75, Sep 27, 2005
  14. buckster75

    buckster75 Member

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    we are to have the mind of Christ. How can we not use it to help others.
     
    #14 buckster75, Sep 27, 2005
  15. bapmom

    bapmom New Member

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    IntoJesus,

    Just because your brother avoided her the first time, and now feels that God is leading him to date her, does not mean that GOd's will has changed for his life. It very well could be that the first time was simply not within God's timing. Perhaps now is the right time, on the other hand. What I suggest is that you do your best to become good friends with this lady.
     
    #15 bapmom, Sep 27, 2005
  16. Thankful

    Thankful <img src=/BettyE.gif>

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    Bapmon, a good post. I agree. Sometimes we do not recognize God's Will for us. His will doesn't change, we do.

    IntoJesus, pray for your brother and support him in whatever decision he makes regarding his future.
     
    #16 Thankful, Sep 27, 2005
  17. intojesus

    intojesus New Member

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    I guess I would just feel better about this all if he seemed to have peace about it. He seems to be shutting out his friends. He seems almost miserable at times. I have never seen him weep so much. He has not even talked about it with me. He seems almost ashamed and I feel confused by this. It was just this past July he was so upset about this women pursing him. But if the Lord changed his heart I say rejoice and he should not act ashamed. I will try to get to know her better. Thanks to all of you for your words of wisdom.
     
    #17 intojesus, Sep 27, 2005
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