Is Singleness A Sin?

I hope singleness isn't a sin, since I was born single and intend to remain that way for a while. I am committed to being chaste, however (or celibate, depending on which word you want to use). It isn't easy, but contemplating passages like 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 helps.

 

I was in a hurry, and read this aloud like this: "I am committed to being chased".

So was I when I was dating . More power to ya!!!!

 

What is wrong with sin?

 

Dr Mohler has received heat from these comments in the past. I like Dr. Mohler but I think his comments on this are off base and since he is not a pastor he would do well to let pastors deal with this. I have emailed him before on this and have not received a reply. I know he is busy (Not sure he is as busy as a Pastor) but I also help pay his salary.

There are Men and Women playing the field but it is also true that many Men and Women are living in a age where potential mates with Christian conviction is getting rare. He would do better to deal with the Divorce rate. Mohler's comments overall I believe show someone who has limited pastoral experience in this area and it would better for a Seminary President to deal with his area of expertise (Theology in which he excels) rather than playing Dr. Phil.

 

(Gen 2: 18) God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone.

 

And that is the problem. We are living in an age where we do not have conviction, much less conviction of our sin.

If 100 20 year old singles decide to wait to get married until they are 30, because they do not feel that they are being selfish, then the results will be:

20 - 30 couples living together. 15 to 20 (couples) more fighting temporary sin. there might be 5 that were actually called by God to be eunuchs.

I would rather lead 100 singles to risk the 30 - 40% divorce rate that plagues our families, than to lead them to the 70 - 80% sin rate that plagues our singles. (Especially since 20 - 40% of them just live in sin, and that is awfully close to divorce.)

I have seen not statistical support for waiting after the age of 22 when getting married.

 

I do not know of any 20 year old singles waiting to get married until they are 30. It has been shown (Though i do bot have statistical support avalilable) that those who get married later in life have a lower divorce rate.

There is no Wife Store or Husband Store where a Single can say "Well, I am getting married now". I personaly think Mohler's comments will just put a guilt trip on singles in their later 20's, 30's, 40's.

Dr Mohler lacks the experience in pastoral ministry to be giving the advice he is given. I know of few Christian singles who are putting off marriage while they play the field or make lots of money. The pressure to get married and have a family is heavy today and most Churches do a poor job to ministering to Singles 25 yrs of age and older. Dr. Mohler only adds to this bashing of older singles as selfish self centered adults.

 

This thread is ridiculous. I know plenty of single people who are serving the Lord and not engaging in sin. If I was single, I'd be offended. In fact, I am offended for my single friends--who are seeking the Lord for a mate and not marrying the first person that comes along. For the most part, they lead fulfilled lives. When you serve the Lord--single or married, you will be fulfilled.

I don't regret my single years. I served the Lord in ways I couldn't now as a married woman. I traveled and participated on missions' trips, learned how to manange my money and pay my own bills. I learned job skills and supported myself. I depended on the Lord to meet my needs and I did my part to take care of myself. I know of women who married in their 20's and have no clue how to even balance a checkbook, pay a bill or work. What would they do if something happened to their spouse?

Like I said before, I am a much better wife in my 40's than I would have been in my 20's. When I got married, I didn't have unrealistic expectations of my dh that some have in their 20's. I hear young married women complain all the time about things like, "why doesn't he help w/the housework?" I respond, "did you ask him?" "No, he should know." "Why doesn't he bring me flowers and gifts." On and on.

I'm not saying all who marry in their 20's have those expectations--but most do. I learned people are human, things would change after marriage, my dh couldn't be responsible for my happiness, respect my in-laws, if I wanted help I needed to ask, and it doesn't matter how my dh folds towels--what matters is that he folds them!lol

If I married in my 20's I would be a divorce stat--b/c the person I was dating was not a committed Christian. I'm glad I waited for man of God.

I repeat, singleness is not the sin. Falling into fornication is.

 

mmm ... I am single, in my case, I do not get the gushy feeling about singleness that some of you do.

What Doctor Mohler says, does not surprise me.

Maybe God leads me down this path, so that I will notice. I do not know.

But what I have heard (I actually talk with other singles about this issue), does not make me comfortable about Christians having the gift of singleness.

I would suggest the book Every Woman's Battle. I could actually suggest a couple of others, but time and money would suggest one book first.

 

I am glad that some of you had the gift of singleness ... I don't think it is passed out as much as you imply.

 

How many of you who have posted in this thread have actually heard Dr. Mohler speak to this subject? I have. Most (I think ALL, but I'll give the benefit of the doubt) of the criticisms that are written here he addresses.

His essential point is this: Culture is flying in the face of the biblical mandate which is to marry (unless one has a specific call to singleness) and have children. There is something seriously wrong with a culture that views marriage and parenthood as something less than God's gift of grace. (If you don't believe this view is being propogated, name me one primetime TV show targeting young adults with a young married couple cast in a favorable light--Friends, Seinfeld, Will & Grace)

 

Barjonah,

I have listened to him speak. I was most interested in how Josh Harris referred questions to Dr. Mohler for answering.

Preach on ...

 

I can't believe he did'nt say this tongue in cheek.

 

There is no such thing as a specific call to singleness. Paul says it is better to stay single so you can serve the Lord. Yes, he says "better". Look it up.

There is no call to singleness. If you can stay single and not burn with passion then you need not marry. "But I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as I am; but if they cannot exercise self-control, let them marry." 1 Corinthians 7:15. "Nevertheless he who stands steadfast in his heart, having no necessity, but has power over his own will, and has so determined in his heart that he will keep his virgin, does well." 1 Corinthians 7:37. Like I said two pages ago, Paul is so abundently clear about this that I simply don't understand why this debate continues. Has anyone actually read 1 Corinthians 7?

 

Martin

Well said. Being single, and not feeling that I am given the 'gift of singleness', I try to make certain that I do not push my lack of gifting on those that have the 'gift of singleness'.

It is always dangerous for the gifted of God to go against their gifting.

 

The argument of whether there's such thing as s call to singleness aside, there is no biblical mandate to marry. If that were the case, then singlehood would be, at some point, a sin. I can find no scriptural support for this.

Additionally, I can find no scripture that says single people are not blessed. Paul was single, and he certainly was blessed.

That's a presumption at best. I can just as easily say that there is something seriously wrong with a culture that views singlhood as something less that God's gift of grace. Again, I point to Paul, who abounded with God's gift of grace.

 

John

Genesis ... God made Eve for Adam and later proclaimed that for this reason a man shall ...

I do not know if that fits your category of mandate, but it has to be CLOSE ...

God bless

 

Martin,

That has to be CLOSE ...