Breakthrough

I just had to come and share what I see as a breakthrough in my healing. As I shared several weeks ago I had left the church where I had been the pastor for seven years due to some conflict. This has caused battle wounds on the whole family. At the time I shared with some here that I felt like I was done. I just could not see me getting back in the pulpit and taking a chance that this could happen to us again.

Well, God has been showing me some things about me. A pastor friend has offered to allow me to preach at his church from time to time and I have always told him "thanks but no thanks" In his offer and in my response God has shown me that I am afraid. I am not afraid of failing, because that would only prove that what I have said about me is true, "There is no way God could use me” I am afraid of doing the very thing that I have said could not be done, and that is of God using me again.

God has been using Peter walking on water to bring this home to me. I am not afraid of sinking, because I am convinced that is all that I could do. I am afraid of walking on water, because if I walk on water then I have no choice but to continue to get out of the boat.

I am starting to understand that I don’t have a choice, but to simply get out of the boat time and time again. AND to keep doing it until I reach Jesus He is waiting for me there on the waves.

I have been convincing myself of how much God must be done with me. So much so that I could not bring myself to post on Pastoral section, I didn’t qualify. And the whole time God was waiting for me.

Thanks for the prayers and the emails. Keep praying as I take my friend up on his offer.

:godisgood: