Can you ask for forgiveness and fail to be forgiven?

[xdisciplex]

When you've sinned and messed up and let's say it's a sin which you've done already so many times then you don't even feel shocked anymore because you've become desensitized to it and then you ask God to forgive you but you don't really feel anything can God refuse forgiving you? Does this mean that it is necessary to make yourself feel really bad and guilty when you ask for forgiveness? Because sometimes I'm scared that I did not feel bad enough when I ask for forgiveness and then I ask again and again until I feel like I've felt enough regret for God to accept that I'm really sorry.
What do you think, will God refuse to forgive you if you don't feel sorry enough?
Or do you think that if you do a certain sin too often then God might refuse to forgive you because you've simply done it too often and no matter what you say he's through with it?

 

[gekko]

will a judge let you go of the punishment of your crime because you just say you're sorry?

 

[Not_hard_to_find]

Because sometimes I'm scared that I did not feel bad enough when I ask for forgiveness and then I ask again and again until I feel like I've felt enough regret for God to accept that I'm really sorry?

It appears you do not understand the difference between asking for forgiveness and being repentent. Why ask for forgiveness if the intent is to continue the erroneous activity?

Being repentent is not only asking for forgivenss, but committing to not commiting the same sin over and over and over again.

However, the crux of your question seems to be -- can God forgive me for repeating the same sin? Yes. Forgiveness has no limit, not even the 70*7:
Mat 18:21-22 Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.

 

[xdisciplex]

will a judge let you go of the punishment of your crime because you just say you're sorry?

eh?

It appears you do not understand the difference between asking for forgiveness and being repentent. Why ask for forgiveness if the intent is to continue the erroneous activity?

Of course I am not planning to continue it but what if you mess it up all the time? Then you cannot even take yourself seriously anymore, I mean if you cannot even take yourself seriously then how is God supposed to take you seriously? If you fail again and again then you don't even have trust in yourself that you might ever succeed, this is the problem.

 

[Dale-c]

If you fail again and again then you don't even have trust in yourself that you might ever succeed, this is the problem.

But YOU won'y ever succedd.
Only God can rescue you from your problems. As long as YOU try to reform, "aint hapnin' "

 

[xdisciplex]

But YOU won'y ever succedd.
Only God can rescue you from your problems. As long as YOU try to reform, "aint hapnin' "

What do you mean? How is this supposed to happen?

 

[Helen]

xdisciplex, are you a follower of Christ? Have you been born again? This is the foundation of the problem. If not, the good you want to do you cannot possibly do, for evil is right there with you. It is only when you have a new nature, given by Christ in a new spiritual birth through the Holy Spirit that you will have the power necessary to conquer your old habits. The power is, indeed, His, but a born again Christian is indwelt by the Holy Spirit and He will change you bit by bit.

If you are born again and you are still being plagued by this whatever-it-is habit, then go to the Lord earnestly in prayer and ask Him to change you. He will do it. The purpose of the Holy Spirit in your life is to conform you to the image of Christ and if Christ did not do this whatever-it-is thing, then you will not either in the long run. Some habits are hard to break, but with God nothing is impossible and He is strong enough to conquer all.

About forgiveness, yes, it is yours for the asking. But there is no need to feel like a rubber ball bouncing back and forth when the Lord is there to give you the strength and wisdom you need to be obedient to Him and live a life that exemplifies Him.

 

[TaterTot]

I agree with what Helen said. Yes, temptation is hard. God doesnt just take temptations away. Just ask David. We have to meet Him halfway. I like to quote scripture when I am tempted in the things that plague me. My favorite one to use is this:

1 Cor. 9:27 "I discipline my body and bring it under subjection, so that when I have preached to others, I myself might not be disqualified."

 

[Joseph_Botwinick]

xdisciplex, are you a follower of Christ? Have you been born again? This is the foundation of the problem. If not, the good you want to do you cannot possibly do, for evil is right there with you. It is only when you have a new nature, given by Christ in a new spiritual birth through the Holy Spirit that you will have the power necessary to conquer your old habits. The power is, indeed, His, but a born again Christian is indwelt by the Holy Spirit and He will change you bit by bit.

Helen,

No lost person seeks to do good in the eyes of the Lord (Romans 3:9-18).

Disciple,

Once you are a Christian, you will struggle with sin for the rest of your life. It is called sanctification and is taught in Romans 7 where Paul talks about his own struggle with sin as a believer (not as an unbeliever, as lost people do not struggle with sin, they embrace it). As I said in another thread to Star of David: Struggle with Sin = Sanctification / No struggle with sin = lost and dead in your sins. You will never be able to achieve righteousness on your own and in your own power. If you are not a Christian, I pray that God will save you. If you are a Christian already, you need to understand that it is God who works out righteousness in you and that you are still a wretched sinner (Romans 7:24). You might be wondering what hope you have as you struggle with your sin nature. The answer is found in verse 25 of Chapter 7 and the whole of Chapter 8.

I hope this helps.

Joseph Botwinick

 

[Scarlett O.]

What do you think, will God refuse to forgive you if you don't feel sorry enough?

No, sweetie, I don't believe that. God's forgiveness isn't based on how I "feel". Even Christians struggle with the flesh and may commit sinful acts and say to themselves, "is this really sinful" or "I'm not really doing anything that other people aren't doing".

God's forgiveness is based on the blood of Christ and my surrendering to the Lordship of Christ. When the Holy Spirit puts us under conviction of our sins, we go to the Lord with them. Even if we don't "feel" sorry....we know that we are sorry creatures before God.

I asked you once if you were saved and got no answer. I'm not asking now, but I do want you to consider this from the responses of the others here.

Do you see how concerned people on the board are confused as to your spiritual status.

You may be saved.....I don't know. And there is nothing wrong with asking questions about God and the bible when we need to know the answers.

But you have asked well over 120 questions that shed some serious doubt on God and His Word. I'm not saying that Christians don't go through periods of doubt, but the the overwhelming quantity of questions that you have asked, (and by the way, you have not been receptive of anyone's answers to you, but instead challenge people's answers over and over), and the mountain of grievous doubt that you say that you have is concerning to people here.

I am concerned for you and have prayed for you many, many times.

I don't want you to stop asking questions. I just want you to get some peace and some assurance that God is REAL and His Word is truth. God loves you.....even in the moments that you are the MOST doubtful.

It's the devil that wants you to believe things such as what you have posted in this question. Things like God won't forgive you if you aren't sorry enough or that God is sick of you or that God is somehow a cruel person just waiting for you to mess up again so that he can punish you.

Do you have any passages in the bible that are meaningful to you? Any passages that bring you peace? Meditate on these.

Do you have a church family that claims the truths of the bible?

I continue to pray for your peace of mind.

 

[genesis12]

Forgive others first. Then take up the issue with God, prayerfully, knowing that He listens. A habit, or "besetting sin," sometimes takes a while to get over.

 

[xdisciplex]

Scarlett,
I have accepted Jesus. But this doesn't mean that I cannot be concerned about things anymore, in fact the more I listen to sermons the more concerned I become. How can you be a christian today and not be confused? I even saw that over at sermonaudio they even have sermons about false and genuine repentance. It seems like no matter what you have there is always a false and a genuine version!
With all this diversity and distinguishment how can you not become worried? If there is a false repentance, a false faith, a false conversion how can I feel safe if there are soooo many things which you can do wrong? :tear:
I'm constantly worried about such things. If it isn't false faith then it's false repentance or something else but there is always something to be concerned about. And I have also heard so many different opinions, it's absolutely clear that I am confused. A christian told me that habitual sins are a red flag for christians and this means that you haven't really repented and that your salvation is not secure!
It's pretty logical that such things scare me. I don't even know what to think anymore, the problem is that most christians learn only from 1 source. Their pastor. They only get 1 opinion and this way they also cannot get confused. No matter if their pastor has it all right they simply learn his stuff and that's it. But since I listen to so many different sermons and get so many different opinions on the internet I cannot even get an own opinion. I think I messed myself up with all this stuff, but what should I have done? Without a church, without input I had to do something and I was also eager to learn, these sermons interest me. But some sermons also confuse me and scare me, this is the price. I really don't know what to think anymore, I miss the simplicity. Everything has become so conflicated, this isn't liberating it's totally restricting and I think I have listened to too many preachers thinking that since they are preachers they got it all right and now I realize that I might have learned a lot of false stuff but I cannot simply reboot my brain or erase everything. And with many questions I also don't know what the right answer is. I don't want to be legalistic but at the same time I am also afraid of being lukewarm. Both things are dangerous, if you're legalistic and think you have to add something to Jesus' work then you have a problem but if you're lukewarm you also have a problem. I don't understand a lot of things. Being lukewarm basically means not having done enough but if not doing enough means going to hell then this means that in order not to go to hell you have to exercise spiritual things and this once again meant that to get to heaven you have to do something and this doesn't fit together with Romans, that we're saved alone by what Jesus did.
The biggest problem is that I don't really know how God is. I never know wether he's angry at me or not. And this opens the door for such thought that God might be angry at me or that God might be losing my patience with me and I cannot do much against these thoughts. Let's say I argued with a christian who is mightily used by God and this christian offends me then how would I know if God is on my side or not? Most likely I would think that God is on the side of this christian because he also uses him. It's basically this insecurity. If I feel like God is on the side of somebody else and not on my side then it sucks and it's logical to assume that God is on the side of those christians which he also uses and then I feel excluded. This is what I don't like about having to belong to a community as a christian. What do you do if somebody offends you and this person doesn't apologize and is still used by God? Then this seems like God doesn't mind this person offending you because he's still using this person, then you feel like you're the dork.

 

[Joseph_Botwinick]

Disciple,

I think I have given you this advice before and you argued with it. But, I will give it again, and then leave it alone. If you want to lose some confusion, get out your Bible and start reading it daily, and find a Christian Church if there are any in your area (if not, there are some great Christian Pastors on this board who can disciple you, people like Dr. Bob Griffin). The more you read the Bible, I think the less confused you will be. You need to put away all the different ideas for a while and allow the Holy Spirit to speak to you through the Bible. You need a pastor who is mature in his faith who can help you understand the hard Scriptures you don't understand.

Joseph Botwinick

 

[Helen]

disciple, Peter was able to walk on water as long as he kept his focus on Jesus. It was when he changed his focus to the storm around him that he started sinking. Even then, Jesus reached out His hand and rescued him.

I can remember times in my early Christian walk when I would think such things as "What if it is all a cosmic joke?" When I became muddled inside, I learned to strip away everything but Jesus. I knew Jesus. Then it would all become clear and peaceful again. He is the center. He is the truth.

Joseph is right about reading your Bible. That is the Lord's Word to us to give a plumb line for truth -- the truth that is Him and which defines all other truth.

We are really as stupid as sheep in the long run. And we need to crowd close to our Shepherd for comfort and security and peace. We belong to Him and thus He is truly and really on 'our side.'

We have some rescue animals here at our place. We also have two yearling wethers (fixed male goats). The goats are twins but so different in personality. One is totally affectionate and wants to be with me whenever I am out in the pasture. The other also wants to be near me but is just about equally interested in eating! So he is often a little further away, a little more quickly satisfied with a little petting, etc. Do I love the 'close' one more than the 'further' one? No, not at all. They are both adorable and I love them both for themselves.

All of our horses have had poor treatment in the past. Snow was an Argentine polo pony and now lives with a broken hip. She is a little more wary of people than the other animals are, despite months of living with us. Yesterday I pulled up a stalk of corn to spoil the beasts with. To Snow it looked like a whip or something and she wouldn't come near me to get it or even wonder what it was. She did her funny lopsided gallop to the other side of the field and stayed there, watching me warily. The goats had no such fear and came up immediately and thought they were in goat heaven. Our little almost-blind dwarf mini filly came up and was delighted with the treat, too.

All Jesus is doing is offering you the best. He truly is the Good Shepherd. You can crowd close to Him and He welcomes you to do so. Don't worry about the fussing and butting horns of the others in the flock. Keep your eye on the Shepherd. He is the one who owns and loves you.