Flattery - What's the definition?

[christianyouth]

How do you define Flattery? How does the Bible define flattery? What are some verses that talk about flattery? :think:

 

[Marcia]

Is this a test? :saint:

I cheated - I did a search on bible gateway.

It seems from these verses that flattery is false speech, using words to make someone feel good in order to manipulate, deceive, or to get something.

1. Job 17:5
   
   • King James Version (KJV)
     He that speaketh flattery to his friends, even the eyes of his children shall fail.
     Job 17:4-6 (in Context) Job 17 (Whole Chapter)

1. Job 32:22
2. New International Version (NIV)
   for if I were skilled in flattery, my Maker would soon take me away.
   Job 32:21-22 (in Context) Job 32 (Whole Chapter)

• New Living Translation (NLT)
  For if I tried flattery,my Creator would soon destroy me.
  Job 32:21-22 (in Context) Job 32 (Whole Chapter)

1. Psalm 5:9
   
   • New Living Translation (NLT)
     My enemies cannot speak a truthful word.Their deepest desire is to destroy others.Their talk is foul, like the stench from an open grave.Their tongues are filled with flattery.
     Psalm 5:8-10 (in Context) Psalm 5 (Whole Chapter)
2. Proverbs 6:24
   
   • King James Version (KJV)
     To keep thee from the evil woman, from the flattery of the tongue of a strange woman.
     Proverbs 6:23-25 (in Context) Proverbs 6 (Whole Chapter)
3. Proverbs 7:5
   
   • New Living Translation (NLT)
     Let them protect you from an affair with an immoral woman,from listening to the flattery of a promiscuous woman.
     Proverbs 7:4-6 (in Context) Proverbs 7 (Whole Chapter)
4. Proverbs 7:21
   
   • New Living Translation (NLT)
     So she seduced him with her pretty speechand enticed him with her flattery.
     Proverbs 7:20-22 (in Context) Proverbs 7 (Whole Chapter)
5. Proverbs 28:23
   
   • New Living Translation (NLT)
     In the end, people appreciate honest criticism far more than flattery.
     Proverbs 28:22-24 (in Context) Proverbs 28 (Whole Chapter)
6. Daniel 11:21
   
   • New Living Translation (NLT)
     “The next to come to power will be a despicable man who is not in line for royal succession. He will slip in when least expected and take over the kingdom by flattery and intrigue.
     Daniel 11:20-22 (in Context) Daniel 11 (Whole Chapter)
7. Daniel 11:32
   
   • New International Version (NIV)
     With flattery he will corrupt those who have violated the covenant, but the people who know their God will firmly resist him.
     Daniel 11:31-33 (in Context) Daniel 11 (Whole Chapter)
8. Romans 16:18
   
   • New International Version (NIV)
     For such people are not serving our Lord Christ, but their own appetites. By smooth talk and flattery they deceive the minds of naive people.
     Romans 16:17-19 (in Context) Romans 16 (Whole Chapter)

1. 1 Thessalonians 2:5
2. New International Version (NIV)
   You know we never used flattery, nor did we put on a mask to cover up greed—God is our witness.
   1 Thessalonians 2:4-6 (in Context) 1 Thessalonians 2 (Whole Chapter)

• New Living Translation (NLT)
  Never once did we try to win you with flattery, as you well know. And God is our witness that we were not pretending to be your friends just to get your money!
  1 Thessalonians 2:4-6 (in Context) 1 Thessalonians 2 (Whole Chapter)

Why did you bring this topic up?

 

[rbell]

How do you define Flattery? How does the Bible define flattery? What are some verses that talk about flattery?

You are the most wonderful person for asking that question.

 

[Mexdeaf]

You are the most wonderful person for asking that question.

And your comedy is better than Jay Leno's!

 

[christianyouth]

hahaha rbell!

Thanks Marcia for doing all of the work. No this isn't a test. I'm just curious about this, because in Proverbs I read a verse that says, "He that flattereth his neighbor spreadeth a net for his feet."

Those verses that Marcia posted show that flattery is viewed as a bad thing and is characteristic of wicked people.

So what is it, so I can avoid it?

 

[donnA]

It seems from these verses that flattery is false speech

Just a question, not a debate, but what if the 'flattery' is something true about the person? Is it considered something else then, not flattery?

 

[MB]

hahaha rbell!

Thanks Marcia for doing all of the work. No this isn't a test. I'm just curious about this, because in Proverbs I read a verse that says, "He that flattereth his neighbor spreadeth a net for his feet."

Those verses that Marcia posted show that flattery is viewed as a bad thing and is characteristic of wicked people.

So what is it, so I can avoid it?

The best way to avoid it is to disarm it. When someone compliments you when you know you don't deserve it. Don't let it give you a proud feeling but instead be aware that that someone is about to try to manipulate you for there own purposes.
MB

 

[Salamander]

And your comedy is better than Jay Leno's!

That isn't saying murch.

 

[Salamander]

Just a question, not a debate, but what if the 'flattery' is something true about the person? Is it considered something else then, not flattery?

It's the purpose and intent that makes it flattery: it is used to take advantage of the person to whom it is applied .

God can be flattered, but he is never deceived by it, nor is he taken advantage of by it either.:godisgood:

 

[Marcia]

Just a question, not a debate, but what if the 'flattery' is something true about the person? Is it considered something else then, not flattery?

I think there's a difference between flattery and a compliment. A compliment is a sincere statement.

Flattery is done in order to manipulate, "butter" someone up so you can get something from him/her. Whether what you say is true or not is really irrelevant here - it's the aim to manipulate or get something.

One can also fall for flattery, so that when it's done on you, you give in to it in a bad way.

 

[Mexdeaf]

That isn't saying murch.

Your wisdom is better than Solomon's!


(But your spelling leaves something to be desired.)

 

[Salamander]

Your wisdom is better than Solomon's!


(But your spelling leaves something to be desired.)

This obsession you have with me must stop! You deserve so MURCH better than I could ever offer such a nice person as yourself!

 

[donnA]

It's the purpose and intent that makes it flattery: it is used to take advantage of the person to whom it is applied .

What if someone compliments you and does not have the motive to take advantage and use the flattery against you, or to manipulate you, aren't seeking to decieve or get anything?

 

[donnA]

I think there's a difference between flattery and a compliment. A compliment is a sincere statement.

Flattery is done in order to manipulate, "butter" someone up so you can get something from him/her. Whether what you say is true or not is really irrelevant here - it's the aim to manipulate or get something.

One can also fall for flattery, so that when it's done on you, you give in to it in a bad way.

So flattery and a compliment are basically the same thing with different intents.
Guess this answers the question I just posted to salamader.

 

[just-want-peace]

Read the following poem. It explains pretty well the dangers of FLATTERY, and why the scripture condemns it.

[FONT="]The Spider and the Fly
poem by Mary Howitt[/FONT]​

[FONT="]
Will you walk into my parlour?" said the Spider to the Fly,
'Tis the prettiest little parlour that ever you did spy;
The way into my parlour is up a winding stair,
And I've a many curious things to shew when you are there."
Oh no, no," said the little Fly, "to ask me is in vain,
For who goes up your winding stair can ne'er come down again."


"I'm sure you must be weary, dear, with soaring up so high;
Will you rest upon my little bed?" said the Spider to the Fly.
"There are pretty curtains drawn around; the sheets are fine and thin,
And if you like to rest awhile, I'll snugly tuck you in!"
Oh no, no," said the little Fly, "for I've often heard it said,
They never, never wake again, who sleep upon your bed!"


Said the cunning Spider to the Fly, " Dear friend what can I do,
To prove the warm affection I 've always felt for you?
I have within my pantry, good store of all that's nice;
I'm sure you're very welcome -- will you please to take a slice?"
"Oh no, no," said the little Fly, "kind Sir, that cannot be,
I've heard what's in your pantry, and I do not wish to see!"


"Sweet creature!" said the Spider, "you're witty and you're wise,
How handsome are your gauzy wings, how brilliant are your eyes!
I've a little looking-glass upon my parlour shelf,
If you'll step in one moment, dear, you shall behold yourself."
"I thank you, gentle sir," she said, "for what you 're pleased to say,
And bidding you good morning now, I'll call another day."


The Spider turned him round about, and went into his den,
For well he knew the silly Fly would soon come back again:
So he wove a subtle web, in a little corner sly,
And set his table ready, to dine upon the Fly.
Then he came out to his door again, and merrily did sing,
"Come hither, hither, pretty Fly, with the pearl and silver wing;
Your robes are green and purple -- there's a crest upon your head;
Your eyes are like the diamond bright, but mine are dull as lead!"

Alas, alas! how very soon this silly little Fly,
Hearing his wily, flattering words, came slowly flitting by;
With buzzing wings she hung aloft, then near and nearer drew,
Thinking only of her brilliant eyes, and green and purple hue --
Thinking only of her crested head -- poor foolish thing! At last,
Up jumped the cunning Spider, and fiercely held her fast.
He dragged her up his winding stair, into his dismal den,
Within his little parlour -- but she ne'er came out again!


And now dear little children, who may this story read,
To idle, silly flattering words, I pray you ne'er give heed:
Unto an evil counsellor, close heart and ear and eye,
And take a lesson from this tale, of the Spider and the Fly.[/FONT]​

 

[christianyouth]

Thanks for sharing the poem, Just-Want-Peace!

 

[Salamander]

What if someone compliments you and does not have the motive to take advantage and use the flattery against you, or to manipulate you, aren't seeking to decieve or get anything?

You are speaking of simple flattery which amounts to a compliment.

 

[donnA]

You are speaking of simple flattery which amounts to a compliment.

Thanks you and Marcia have helped me to know the difference.
New question comes to mind.
How do you know the difference when someone is complementing you or using flattery to get something their way?

 

[Salamander]

You'll have to play that out I suppose, unless you KNOW the person is out to get something.

I've had a hard time learning this, especially from church members who only want to take advantage of my expertise for thier own gain.

I believe in helping those of the household of faith, it does bother me when all they want to do is help themselves.

People play little games to try and tease others into trusting them. Too many times it is to either get what they want from them monetarilly, or to impugn their character as if it gains them popularity or honor.

I like the "tried and true" brethren, the hypocrites can take a walk!

 

[Mexdeaf]

This obsession you have with me must stop! You deserve so MURCH better than I could ever offer such a nice person as yourself!

:laugh::wavey::godisgood::thumbs: