How do christians usually get wives?

[xdisciplex]

As a christian you can only marry a christian woman. This means that your choice is already pretty much reduced and you can basically only choose from those christian women which you either know from church or from somewhere else. Isn't this a bit frustrating? I mean what do you do if you're at a church and there's only like 1 or 2 women which are in your age, does this mean that since these are the only christian women which you know and most likely get to know in the future that you have to either take one of them or leave it? I think this is totally crazy. This is like going into a shop where they have 1 watch and then you directly buy it without having seen other watches. Maybe there is a watch which would have been much better. Or what do you do if all watches which are there don't suit you?
What if you're in a church and there is no woman at all which seems right for you? Does this mean that you either accept your fate or that you marry a woman which you don't like?
I don't think I'm exaggerating because you can only choose from what's there but unless you're going to a really huge church with tons of christian women you don't have much to choose from. Does this mean that you shall simply leave it up to God if he wants you to find a woman or not or does this mean that you have to actively explore new resources and go from church to church kinda like locusts which move from feeding ground to feeding ground? :laugh:

 

[His Blood Spoke My Name]

I like the answer given here:
http://www.baptistboard.com/showpost.php?p=116510&postcount=11

 

[tragic_pizza]

As a christian you can only marry a christian woman. This means that your choice is already pretty much reduced and you can basically only choose from those christian women which you either know from church or from somewhere else. Isn't this a bit frustrating? I mean what do you do if you're at a church and there's only like 1 or 2 women which are in your age, does this mean that since these are the only christian women which you know and most likely get to know in the future that you have to either take one of them or leave it? I think this is totally crazy. This is like going into a shop where they have 1 watch and then you directly buy it without having seen other watches. Maybe there is a watch which would have been much better. Or what do you do if all watches which are there don't suit you?
What if you're in a church and there is no woman at all which seems right for you? Does this mean that you either accept your fate or that you marry a woman which you don't like?
I don't think I'm exaggerating because you can only choose from what's there but unless you're going to a really huge church with tons of christian women you don't have much to choose from. Does this mean that you shall simply leave it up to God if he wants you to find a woman or not or does this mean that you have to actively explore new resources and go from church to church kinda like locusts which move from feeding ground to feeding ground? :laugh:

xdx, do you have to get married? If so, why?

The point is that relationships happen not because we're swimming in a big enough pool, but because they happen.

Let's say none of the girls at the church you go to interest you. One day, you're at your job and boom in walks a girl that makes you forget to breathe. Turns out she's a Christian, too.

It happens all the time.

The point is: relax. If I can get married (and stay that way for 21 years), ANYONE can get married.

 

[webdog]

Does this mean that you shall simply leave it up to God if he wants you to find a woman or not or does this mean that you have to actively explore new resources and go from church to church kinda like locusts which move from feeding ground to feeding ground? :laugh:

I chose the first (to an extent, as my walk with God was not healthy at the time)...and it worked. I got so tired of the dating scene. Without the first, you can go to every church in the world and not find a wife. That's where faith comes from. My wife wasnt' a believer when we met, but I just knew that she would become one. How I knew this, I don't know. She was saved before we got married.

 

[PastorGreg]

As an IFB, I just took my club over to her dad's cave, grabbed her by the hair, and dragged her home.

Just kidding. Relax.

The issue is trusting God. If God has a wife for you, He knows exactly where she is and how He's going to bring you together. I Cor. 7 says to just focus your energy and attention on serving him while you are not fettered by a wife and family. (That's not a negative, just reality - when one marries, he takes on a whole new set of responsibilities and doesn't have the latitude he did when single. A big problem in our churches today is men in ministry who serve as if they were single, but I guess that's adifferent issue.)

 

[music4Him]

In a nut shell.... I met my husband at the lake. We went fishing togethter I fell in the water he laughed as I came out of the water. We got married, I told him about Jesus.... he got saved. We so far have had 20 years of married bliss!
Just listen to God because the Lord knows our needs better than we do.

 

[webdog]

As an IFB, I just took my club over to her dad's cave, grabbed her by the hair, and dragged her home.

Just kidding. Relax.

I thought that was the way the "primitive" baptists did it! :laugh:

 

[StefanM]

I went to a Christian college, so it made it easier to meet Christian girls. That's not why I went (I went to get training for the ministry), but it worked out.

 

[DQuixote]

xdx .........

You created the "discussion", found fault with it, inserted a horror mask. YOU did all that.

Relax. You don't need to troll. Get your own house in order.


http://www.lesfeldick.org/lesqa-a.html

Don't argue it, don't debate it, don't judge it, just study it. Period.

 

[Pete]

Passengers ask me in cab how do you become a taxi driver, my answer is "Well, after they take out your brain the rest just falls in to place..."

Hitching is the same.

 

[xdisciplex]

Hi everybody,
so this means that basically one should not do anything because if God wants to then he can send somebody to your door? Isn't this a very passive approach? But what if being alone isn't fulfilling? I mean I can imagine that it's not very funny when you're old and alone and the older you are the less like you'll find a woman.
I think this has to be very frustrating.

 

[His Blood Spoke My Name]

had to check through saved files from 2 years ago, but I found it.

The Top 15 Biblical Ways to Acquire a Wife

Find an attractive prisoner of war, bring her home, shave her head, trim her nails, and give her new clothes. Then she's yours.
-- Deuterononmy (Deuteronomy 21:11-13)
Find a prostitute and marry her.
-- Hosea (Hosea 1:1-3)
Find a man with seven daughters, and impress him by watering his flock.
-- Moses (Exodus 2:16-21)
Purchase a piece of property, and get a woman as part of the deal.
-- Boaz (Ruth 4:5-10)
Go to a party and hide. When the women come out to dance, grab one and carry her off to be your wife.
-- Benjaminites (Judges 21:19-25)
Have God create a wife for you while you sleep. Note: this will cost you a rib.
-- Adam (Genesis 2:19-24)
Agree to work seven years in exchange for a woman's hand in marriage. Get tricked into marrying the wrong woman. Then work another seven years for the woman you wanted to marry in the first place. That's right. Fourteen years of toil for a woman.
-- Jacob (Genesis 29:15-30)
Cut off 200 foreskins off of your future father-in-law's enemies and get his daughter for a wife.
-- David (I Samuel 18:27)
Even if no one is out there, just wander around a bit and you'll definitely find someone. (It's all relative of course.)
-- Cain (Genesis 4:16-17)
Become the emperor of a huge nation and hold a beauty contest.
-- Xerxes or Ahasuerus (Esther 2:3-4)
When you see someone you like, go home and tell your parents, "I have seen a ...woman; now get her for me." If your parents question your decision, simply say, "Get her for me. She's the one for me."
-- Samson (Judges 14:1-3)
Kill any husband and take HIS wife. (Prepare to lose four sons though).
-- David (2 Samuel 11)
Wait for your brother to die. Take his widow. (It's not just a good idea, it's the law).
-- Onan and Boaz (Deuteronomy or Leviticus, example in Ruth)
Don't be so picky. Make up for quality with quantity.
-- Solomon (1 Kings 11:1-3)
A wife?...NOT!!!
-- Paul (1 Corinthians 7:32-35)

 

[BobRyan]

As an IFB, I just took my club over to her dad's cave, grabbed her by the hair, and dragged her home.

I have two daughters - homeschooled from first through highschool then got engineering scholarships to NCState. Now that they are out we have the problem of being "victims of our own success". Can't find a guy that is good enough for them.:laugh:

BTW - based on Pastor Greg's response - I am glad I not an IFB parent of two daughters.:laugh:

Just kidding. Relax.

The issue is trusting God. If God has a wife for you, He knows exactly where she is and how He's going to bring you together.

That is exactly what we tell them about a future husband.

Most of you know the way I post - and so I suppose you can take a wild guess at their interest in a strictly exegetical approach to scripture and doctrine. In fact I have gone out of my way to expose them to the door-to-door Bible study groups enviting all commers in so the girls could see first hand what other views are by those who genuinely believe them. (And of course they enjoy reading this board as well)

Lots of fun -- but now what?

In Christ,

Bob

 

[gekko]

i go work at a summer camp every year to be a camp counsellor.

along the way - lots of very beautiful women are there. i make friends with everybody at the camp. if i'm interested (which usually i am, but i'm not into relationships right now) - then you know the rest.

but like i said... not into relationships at this point.

 

[amity]

Be interested in life. Have hobbies, go places, get involved, meet people. Somewhere out there is probably the right woman for you. The more people you meet, the more likely you are to meet her.

 

[BobRyan]

Good post Amity - welcome.

 

[EdSutton]

had to check through saved files from 2 years ago, but I found it.

The Top 15 Biblical Ways to Acquire a Wife

Find an attractive prisoner of war, bring her home, shave her head, trim her nails, and give her new clothes. Then she's yours.
-- Deuterononmy (Deuteronomy 21:11-13)
Find a prostitute and marry her.
-- Hosea (Hosea 1:1-3)
Find a man with seven daughters, and impress him by watering his flock.
-- Moses (Exodus 2:16-21)
Purchase a piece of property, and get a woman as part of the deal.
-- Boaz (Ruth 4:5-10)
Go to a party and hide. When the women come out to dance, grab one and carry her off to be your wife.
-- Benjaminites (Judges 21:19-25)
Have God create a wife for you while you sleep. Note: this will cost you a rib.
-- Adam (Genesis 2:19-24)
Agree to work seven years in exchange for a woman's hand in marriage. Get tricked into marrying the wrong woman. Then work another seven years for the woman you wanted to marry in the first place. That's right. Fourteen years of toil for a woman.
-- Jacob (Genesis 29:15-30)
Cut off 200 foreskins off of your future father-in-law's enemies and get his daughter for a wife.
-- David (I Samuel 18:27)
Even if no one is out there, just wander around a bit and you'll definitely find someone. (It's all relative of course.)
-- Cain (Genesis 4:16-17)
Become the emperor of a huge nation and hold a beauty contest.
-- Xerxes or Ahasuerus (Esther 2:3-4)
When you see someone you like, go home and tell your parents, "I have seen a ...woman; now get her for me." If your parents question your decision, simply say, "Get her for me. She's the one for me."
-- Samson (Judges 14:1-3)
Kill any husband and take HIS wife. (Prepare to lose four sons though).
-- David (2 Samuel 11)
Wait for your brother to die. Take his widow. (It's not just a good idea, it's the law).
-- Onan and Boaz (Deuteronomy or Leviticus, example in Ruth)
Don't be so picky. Make up for quality with quantity.
-- Solomon (1 Kings 11:1-3)
A wife?...NOT!!!
-- Paul (1 Corinthians 7:32-35)

I like this post! :laugh: :laugh:

Ed

 

[EdSutton]

Passengers ask me in cab how do you become a taxi driver, my answer is "Well, after they take out your brain the rest just falls in to place..."

Hitching is the same.

Thanks, Pete. Now I know why I've driven a cab on and off for some years!

Duh! I never knew, before! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

Ed

 

[trainbrainmommy]

I went to Bible college - didn't meet a mate. I lived in a couple large areas with many single men - didn't meet a mate. God had someone better for me! I met my husband on a Christian matchmaker website. We were both very selective, but we were proactive because we did not desire to be alone. We were each living in small or rural areas with few quality Christians our ages. We have been married for 7 years and are very happy with 2 beautiful children. :love2:

 

[mcdirector]

Ron and I met at church, but I'd met a lot of other guys at church too that I didn't marry or feel any desire to even go out with.

I do like the cave and club approach.