I wrote the following prose poem about a person I knew when we were younger. I want to know if it sounds good, and if it has good poetic rhythm. I also want to know if there is anything sinful about it. I also want to know if it is clear.
The use of the word, “then”, I left ambiguous, not wishing to specify whether I mean "at that time" or "next chronologically", because I am not quite sure if I can say one or the other with confidence. (I also don't wish to speak ill of this person.) While it is true that kindness was demonstrated by this person even in times when it seemed like she was mean, or alternating with those times, it also seems so that she demonstrated more abundant kindness which was more steadfast toward the end of the time that I knew her.
I do not know if this poem expresses virtue or vice.
I also wrote it relatively quickly, first forming and revising a rhythm for the first clause, then filling it in with words, then making one further edit. Afterward, with diminishing deliberateness of choosing feet, but not total lack of awareness of feet, I wrote the rest of it, and made further revisions, but not many. The reason the poem is so short is because I am so lazy, lacking self-discipline.
Also, sometimes, when writing ordinary prose, that is, not prose poetry, sometimes it is easy, and sometimes I can’t get the words to flow at all. I don’t know why that is. I don’t know if this post flows, but it was easy to write.
The use of the word, “then”, I left ambiguous, not wishing to specify whether I mean "at that time" or "next chronologically", because I am not quite sure if I can say one or the other with confidence. (I also don't wish to speak ill of this person.) While it is true that kindness was demonstrated by this person even in times when it seemed like she was mean, or alternating with those times, it also seems so that she demonstrated more abundant kindness which was more steadfast toward the end of the time that I knew her.
I do not know if this poem expresses virtue or vice.
I also wrote it relatively quickly, first forming and revising a rhythm for the first clause, then filling it in with words, then making one further edit. Afterward, with diminishing deliberateness of choosing feet, but not total lack of awareness of feet, I wrote the rest of it, and made further revisions, but not many. The reason the poem is so short is because I am so lazy, lacking self-discipline.
Also, sometimes, when writing ordinary prose, that is, not prose poetry, sometimes it is easy, and sometimes I can’t get the words to flow at all. I don’t know why that is. I don’t know if this post flows, but it was easy to write.
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