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Light Bulb Jokes

Discussion in 'Jokes & Humor (Clean)' started by SonPraises, Jul 28, 2011.

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  1. SonPraises

    SonPraises New Member

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    Q: How many Baptists does it take to change a lightbulb?
    A: CHANGE????!!!!

    Q: How many Pentecostal does it take to change a lightbulb?
    A: Eleven. One to change it and ten to agree to bind the power of darkness.

    Q: How many Lutherans does it take to change a lightbulb?
    A: Two. One to change it and one to post a list or reasons the change is necessary on the door.

    Q: How many missionary board members does it take to change a lightbulb.
    A: 1,251. 500 to organize a fund raising campaign. 100 to research and teach the cultural and society of the lighbulb's region. 50 to translate the Jesus movie into the lightbulb's native language, 250 to serve as prayer partners, 325 Women's Missionary Union members to collect clothing to donate to the lightbulb and 25 to find a national to aid in the work, and 1 national to change the light bulb himself.
     
    #1 SonPraises, Jul 28, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 28, 2011
  2. FriendofSpurgeon

    FriendofSpurgeon Well-Known Member
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    Some more ...


    How many Charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?
    Only one, but anyone can do it since their hands are in the air anyway.


    How many Presbyterians does it take to change a light bulb?
    None. God has predestined when the light will be on.


    How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?
    One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.


    How many independent congregationalists does it take to change a light bulb?
    Only one, because any more might result in too much cooperation.


    How many Catholics does it take to change a light bulb?
    None. They always use candles.


    How many members of church that is over 20 years old does it take to change a light bulb?
    One to actually change the bulb, and nine to say how much they liked the old one.


    How many Methodists does it take to change a light bulb?
    This statement was issued: "We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that a light bulb works for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your personal relationship with your light bulb (or light source, or non-dark resource), and present it next month at our annual light bulb Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, three-way, long-life, and tinted – all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence."
     
    #2 FriendofSpurgeon, Jul 29, 2011
  3. FundyPat

    FundyPat New Member

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    Love those. :laugh:
     
    #3 FundyPat, Aug 1, 2011
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