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Needing answers concerning divorce decree

H

Heaven Bound

New Member
My divorce from my ex-husband (his choosing) was final in 1986. At that time, our children were 6 and 9. He was loyal in paying his child support and the house payment. Our decree stated that I could live in the marital home until I remarried or decided to sell the house. I vowed to myself I would not remarry until the children were grown and out on their own. I did not ask for alimony. I went back to work and raised my children. I tried to keep up house repairs and make do with the money I had. He in the meantime, married the woman he was having an affair with and built a brand new house. I remarried in 2005 to wonderful man who God sent to me. All this to say this...do divorce decrees stay binding forever? My ex is asking for $20,000 for his part of the house since I am now married. After 20 years of being without a relationship, taking care of "our" children, trying to keep the house together and work, I just feel I'm being cheated on again. He never paid me anything! The child support naturally was for the children and the house payment was to keep a roof over their head. He divorced me...so obviously he was not concerned that I had one over my head or not! If their is a "saved by the blood of Jesus" lawyer here, I would greatly appreciate your response.

In Christ,

Heaven Bound
 
J

jilphn1022

New Member
Concerned member

Heaven Bound said:
My divorce from my ex-husband (his choosing) was final in 1986. At that time, our children were 6 and 9. He was loyal in paying his child support and the house payment. Our decree stated that I could live in the marital home until I remarried or decided to sell the house. I vowed to myself I would not remarry until the children were grown and out on their own. I did not ask for alimony. I went back to work and raised my children. I tried to keep up house repairs and make do with the money I had. He in the meantime, married the woman he was having an affair with and built a brand new house. I remarried in 2005 to wonderful man who God sent to me. All this to say this...do divorce decrees stay binding forever? My ex is asking for $20,000 for his part of the house since I am now married. After 20 years of being without a relationship, taking care of "our" children, trying to keep the house together and work, I just feel I'm being cheated on again. He never paid me anything! The child support naturally was for the children and the house payment was to keep a roof over their head. He divorced me...so obviously he was not concerned that I had one over my head or not! If their is a "saved by the blood of Jesus" lawyer here, I would greatly appreciate your response.

In Christ,

Heaven Bound
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I have no ready answers for you,but I will be remember you in your family. Praying the Lord will guide you and strengthen you at this time in your life.
May your grow in Him during this time.
 
J

JamieinNH

New Member
I am sorry to say I don't have an answer for you either. My advice would be to touch base with your lawyer that handled your divorce if he is still around, if not I would find a lawyer to meet with and see if they can give you any advice.

I am sorry you're having to go though this..

Jamie
 
R

Rubato 1

New Member
Heaven Bound said:
If their is a "saved by the blood of Jesus" lawyer here, I would greatly appreciate your response.
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Stories like this make my blood boil. I wish you were looking for a hit man rather than a lawyer...
I'll pray for you.
 
Y

youngmom4

New Member
Heaven Bound said:
My divorce from my ex-husband (his choosing) was final in 1986. At that time, our children were 6 and 9. He was loyal in paying his child support and the house payment. Our decree stated that I could live in the marital home until I remarried or decided to sell the house. I vowed to myself I would not remarry until the children were grown and out on their own. I did not ask for alimony. I went back to work and raised my children. I tried to keep up house repairs and make do with the money I had. He in the meantime, married the woman he was having an affair with and built a brand new house. I remarried in 2005 to wonderful man who God sent to me. All this to say this...do divorce decrees stay binding forever? My ex is asking for $20,000 for his part of the house since I am now married. After 20 years of being without a relationship, taking care of "our" children, trying to keep the house together and work, I just feel I'm being cheated on again. He never paid me anything! The child support naturally was for the children and the house payment was to keep a roof over their head. He divorced me...so obviously he was not concerned that I had one over my head or not! If their is a "saved by the blood of Jesus" lawyer here, I would greatly appreciate your response.

In Christ,

Heaven Bound
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Well, I'm not a lawyer yet, but I am a pre-law student. The unfortunate answer to your question is yes, a divorce decree is a legally binding document forever, unless it specifies a specific time period. If you go to court, you would more than likely be ordered to sell the house and split the profits with your ex-husband because you have remarried, and that was the terms of the agreement. Obviously, you probably do not have $20,000 laying around to give him to buy him out. Of course, another option would be to take out a mortgage or second mortgage on the house to get the money to buy him out if you really want to stay in it. Unfortunately, he is well within his rights to ask this of you, and technically speaking, refusing to comply with his request could result in a contempt of court charge because you would be refusing to honor the court order. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news but that is just the way our legal system works, no matter how unfair it may seem at this late date.
 
N

North Carolina Tentmaker

New Member
Heaven Bound said:
I just feel I'm being cheated on again. He never paid me anything! The child support naturally was for the children and the house payment was to keep a roof over their head.
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I am really sorry for your situation Heaven Bound and I hate to pile on to your trouble. But if he made the house payments why wouldn't he have some claim on the equity in the house? How long did he make the payments on the house?

If your youngest was 6 when he started and he made payments until they were 18 then we are talking about 12 years or 144 monthly house payments. If you house payment was $500 a month (just a guess based on 1986 home prices) then we are talking about over $70,000 he paid. And he wants 20 back. I am sure the guy is a bum and all but that just does not sound outrageous to me.
 
K

Karen

Active Member
youngmom has given some good basic advice. But please be aware that she is in TX and you are in SC. The specifics of the law and how property is held in marriage do vary from state to state. Around here it would cost $100 or less to consult with an attorney on this issue. Maybe a lot less. You can always call and ask what their fees are for a short general consultation.
It would be money well-spent to know exactly what your situation is.
 
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