Police Calm Millennial Protesters By Handing Out Participation Trophies

[Revmitchell]

U.S.—As anti-Trump rallies nationwide turned hostile overnight with widespread reports of violence, looting, vandalism, and death threats against the president-elect and his supporters, police in numerous major cities were able to instill calm and regain control by handing out participation trophies to all millennial protesters who were enraged about losing the election, sources confirmed.

The shrewd tactic was the idea New York Police Officer Joe Butler, who has three twentysomething children himself, and noted to reporters Thursday that he remembered how his children “never had to deal with losing as they were growing up.”

“It’s a foreign notion to them. Even in sports—win or lose, everyone won, and everyone got a trophy no matter what. This is the millennial way,” he said. “So I had the idea—hey, why not start handing out participation trophies to the protesters, and telling them ‘Hey, you know what? You may have lost the election, but look—everyone gets a trophy. Everyone’s a winner.'”

http://babylonbee.com/news/police-calm-millennial-protesters-handing-participation-trophies/

 

[Crabtownboy]

Pretty smart response.

 

[Don]

U.S.—As anti-Trump rallies nationwide turned hostile overnight with widespread reports of violence, looting, vandalism, and death threats against the president-elect and his supporters, police in numerous major cities were able to instill calm and regain control by handing out participation trophies to all millennial protesters who were enraged about losing the election, sources confirmed.

The shrewd tactic was the idea New York Police Officer Joe Butler, who has three twentysomething children himself, and noted to reporters Thursday that he remembered how his children “never had to deal with losing as they were growing up.”

“It’s a foreign notion to them. Even in sports—win or lose, everyone won, and everyone got a trophy no matter what. This is the millennial way,” he said. “So I had the idea—hey, why not start handing out participation trophies to the protesters, and telling them ‘Hey, you know what? You may have lost the election, but look—everyone gets a trophy. Everyone’s a winner.'”

http://babylonbee.com/news/police-calm-millennial-protesters-handing-participation-trophies/

So - what you're saying is that even though everyone got a participation sticker ("I voted"), people are upset and unable to cope with the thought that the person they voted for isn't the president?

Are you trying to tell us that all those soccer games where no one actually keeps score, aren't preparing us for things like elections where there has to be an actual winner?

 

[Revmitchell]

So - what you're saying is that even though everyone got a participation sticker ("I voted"), people are upset and unable to cope with the thought that the person they voted for isn't the president?

Are you trying to tell us that all those soccer games where no one actually keeps score, aren't preparing us for things like elections where there has to be an actual winner?

Come on now, don't go and try to understand libs with reason. That will blow your circuits.

 

[evangelist6589]

U.S.—As anti-Trump rallies nationwide turned hostile overnight with widespread reports of violence, looting, vandalism, and death threats against the president-elect and his supporters, police in numerous major cities were able to instill calm and regain control by handing out participation trophies to all millennial protesters who were enraged about losing the election, sources confirmed.

The shrewd tactic was the idea New York Police Officer Joe Butler, who has three twentysomething children himself, and noted to reporters Thursday that he remembered how his children “never had to deal with losing as they were growing up.”

“It’s a foreign notion to them. Even in sports—win or lose, everyone won, and everyone got a trophy no matter what. This is the millennial way,” he said. “So I had the idea—hey, why not start handing out participation trophies to the protesters, and telling them ‘Hey, you know what? You may have lost the election, but look—everyone gets a trophy. Everyone’s a winner.'”

http://babylonbee.com/news/police-calm-millennial-protesters-handing-participation-trophies/

Trump needs to build more jails. Protestors belong in them when they get uncivil.

 

[Squire Robertsson]

Are you calling for a Federalization of crimes currently under state and local jurisdiction?

Trump needs to build more jails. Protestors belong in them when they get uncivil.

 

[InTheLight]

Trump needs to build more jails. Protestors belong in them when they get uncivil.

The protests are not uncivil. The federal government does not build prisons for the purposes of jailing demonstrators.

Sent from my Motorola Droid Turbo

 

[evangelist6589]

Are you calling for a Federalization of crimes currently under state and local jurisdiction?

I am not sure

 

[evangelist6589]

The protests are not uncivil. The federal government does not build prisons for the purposes of jailing demonstrators.

Sent from my Motorola Droid Turbo

Excuse me but when the protestors start damaging property and beating people up in their cars because they voted Trump the protestors need to protest behind bars.

 

[Squire Robertsson]

1. The protests are not uncivil.
2. The federal government does not build prisons for the purposes of jailing demonstrators.

As to point 1, what I've seen in a few (but not all) cities are riots. That's uncivil in my book.
As to point 2, much of the problem we have in our criminal justice system is its over Federalization.

 

[evangelist6589]

As to point 1, what I've seen in a few (but not all) cities are riots. That's uncivil in my book.
As to point 2, much of the problem we have in our criminal justice system is its over Federalization.

Over federalization what's that?

 

[InTheLight]

I haven't heard about any rioting. Federal prisons are for felons, not people that are guilty of disorderly conduct.

Agree with you on the over federalization of many things.

Sent from my Motorola Droid Turbo

 

[Rolfe]

Over federalization what's that?

Is that a serious question?

 

[evangelist6589]

Is that a serious question?

Yes

 

[evangelist6589]

I haven't heard about any rioting. Federal prisons are for felons, not people that are guilty of disorderly conduct.

Agree with you on the over federalization of many things.

Sent from my Motorola Droid Turbo

That's why we have jails

 

[Rolfe]

Yes

Read this book:

*laugh*

 

[evangelist6589]

Read this book:

*laugh*

I have enough books!

 

[TC]

I have enough books!

Colorado doesn't have any libraries? I also find that statement funny in light of how many times you tell others to buy and read books.

 

[HeDied4U]

I can just hear Oprah now....

 

[Rolfe]

You guys do realize that it is a Babylon Bee story, right?