Question about a couple eloping

Has the family asked the pastor for an explanation?

 

Elopement, in and of itself, is not immoral although there are other factors to consider. For example, it may be hurtful to family. I think an explanation is in order as to why the pastor believes this. Perhaps he felt the marriage had other motives? Perhaps he didn't like the courtroom wedding (although, I suppose the couple may be planning a church wedding when the groom returns)? I hope that before any more decisions are made, the pastor can explain himself to the woman.

 

I am not a pastor, but I will comment that similar weddings happened over and over in WWII, sometimes with the couple knowing each other for a very short time. Many of these weddings lasted for 50-60 years. (I'm compiling a scrapbook from my hometown newspaper.)

They were grown adults. Is the family upset about her eloping?

Somebody should ask the pastor why he thinks this way.
On a practical basis, I would want to attend my child's wedding, but nothing you have presented sounds "immoral".

 

Well, he might know something that he is not sharing with the congregation, or he might be wrong.

Without knowing more about the issue, everything I could say would be merely conjecture.

But, in today's world - that was fast.

God bless

Wayne

 

In OT times all marriages were civil events.

A Christian man I taught with years ago was married to a woman at the time for 33 years and they were married before a judge. At the time of their marriage he was 18 and she was 16. She finished high school and both of them went on to finish college and he got a doctorate. Both families supported their marriage.

 

Immorality calls for discipline of its members in the church. When was that done?

 

Sounds like people are having difficulty in differentiating between their prefercences and God's. I think if there are deacons who cannot explain this, then these deacons should talk with the pastor as to what (according to scripture) is immoral in this situation.

 

Some pastors have their own "rules" and when these "rules" are broken....someone will pay. Lots of times some of these guys lord over their flock so to speak and are "ticked off" when a teacher in their church does something they don't like. They don't have to have a scriptural reason. I know what I am talking about.....look around at some of the nuts on this board. By the way I am a pastor (probably one of the nuts) and I know some guys in Philadelphia...raying: ..and I think I might know where you came from, Old Paths?

 

My grandpa was from Georgia and was moved to Texas by the Amry during WWII to help people in the cotton mill in Itasca, TX. My Grandma worked there. They met and he asked her several times for a date. She declined. She finally relented and went with him. They were later married at the home of her pastor with only the pastor, his wife, my grandparents, and a female cousin present. My grandma's parents were not there. All of this took place 6 weeks after my grandparents first met, and 2 weeks after their first date. He was 22 and she was 21. They were married for 40 years, until his death.

If the only reason for this behavior by the pastor and others is because the young lady eloped, then he should be ashamed of himself. Frankly, it is none of his business how she chooses to get married. She is a grown woman and is legally, and scripturally, allowed to decide these things.

If this is a "rule" this pastor has, then I wonder what other "rules" he has that you and the church may not know about. The deacons really need to talk to this pastor before he starts running off people from the church for other non-scriptural reasons.

 

Sounds like this may fall into some of the guidelines of her status as a missionary, rather than a moral judgment on her marriage. If that's the case, then I'm sure she knew the consequences ahead of making her decision.

I pray that God is glorified in you, your church, and this new couple.

 

So God can not bring two people together through moving one of them to serve at a new church and meeting his/her mate there or through someone there? I have to say I am still quite puzzled by your pastor's viewing it as "deception". I guess I am just missing something here.

 

Wow

I mean - it is better not to go looking for a spouse from the field where you serve as a missionary - but to call it a deception and a sin - that would take proof that the young lady was "dating" or "courting" if you prefer, the locals while serving and not just one other guy

I mean the Biblical precedent of 3 witnesses:

if she dated three guys - then ok there's a problem
if she only dated him - then there's no problem
if she only dated one other guy - then there should be a short period of re-evaluation

Of course I'm assuming less then 5 years - since a good relationship leading towards marriage should take a year to 2 years - with preference towards the two! But hey I know guys are {SNIP} - so we try to speed things up

 

I stand by my original comments.

What other extra-biblical beliefs does this pastor have? Just who is he to tell two grown up single people who they can or can not love and marry?

Frankly, it's none of his business.

Of course, since I don't believe in missionaries or Sunday school teachers, I don't really know why I'm complaining. Maybe it's just the principle.

I am not only looking for a woman to one day marry, but I sincerely hope I find her in the church.