1. Welcome to Baptist Board, a friendly forum to discuss the Baptist Faith in a friendly surrounding.

    Your voice is missing! You will need to register to get access to all the features that our community has to offer.

    We hope to see you as a part of our community soon and God Bless!

Secret crushes?

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by Wanderer, Feb 19, 2016.

  1. Wanderer

    Wanderer Member

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2007
    Messages:
    38
    Likes Received:
    4
    Never mind, not ready to talk about it - other than is it normal to have then when married?
     
    #1 Wanderer, Feb 19, 2016
    Last edited: Feb 19, 2016
  2. Darrell C

    Darrell C Well-Known Member
    Site Supporter

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2010
    Messages:
    9,773
    Likes Received:
    341
    Faith:
    Baptist
    Not really, lol. While we might say, due to the weakness of the flesh, that it is normal that it happens, it is still trespassing in an area of adultery. While affection for someone other than our spouses might happen, when it is in a context of intimacy or desire as we share with our spouses...it is sin, and should be dealt with immediately before things get out of hand and something happens that I can assure you will be regretted.


    God bless.
     
    • Agree Agree x 1
  3. Darrell C

    Darrell C Well-Known Member
    Site Supporter

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2010
    Messages:
    9,773
    Likes Received:
    341
    Faith:
    Baptist
    And I see you are from Alaska. I was stationed there with my step-dad 75-78 roughly. My sister is still in Anchorage, and complaining about no snow there this year (I think we have had more than they have).

    Welcome to the forum, Wanderer. I hope you will be blessed in your time here, and that you may be a blessing to those here.


    God bless.
     
  4. preachinjesus

    preachinjesus Well-Known Member
    Site Supporter

    Joined:
    Feb 9, 2004
    Messages:
    7,406
    Likes Received:
    101
    Wanderer, I saw your original post, before the edit, and I will say, in reply to that and with this new edit in mind, you need to sit down with someone, a pastor preferably, and discuss your situation. We all struggle with temptations, particularly when expectations in relationships aren't being met. Having someone in real life who you can talk to will be mightily helpful.
     
    • Like Like x 2
  5. Rolfe

    Rolfe Well-Known Member
    Site Supporter

    Joined:
    May 17, 2014
    Messages:
    6,898
    Likes Received:
    638
    Faith:
    Baptist
    Guard your mind with all diligence.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  6. Aaron

    Aaron Member
    Site Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 4, 2000
    Messages:
    20,253
    Likes Received:
    1,381
    Faith:
    Baptist
    Yes, it's normal. So, no, you're not a perv simply because you find yourself enamored with someone. Simply confess with your mouth what most church-going men try to deny, that your heart is corrupt and adulterous. Agree with Jesus and ask Him to help you.

    If you keep in the forefront of your mind, that whatever satisfaction you think your crush can supply is an illusion, and that once gotten it is soon hated, it's easier.

    Maybe the attraction isn't physical. Maybe the marriage is bad. Then your crush is the least of your worries. Seek counseling. Ask God to send the counselor, because a lot of what I hear pass as Christian counseling is pig vomit.

    Anyway. You're not a perv, and you're not alone. So don't screw up.
     
    • Agree Agree x 1
  7. Aaron

    Aaron Member
    Site Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 4, 2000
    Messages:
    20,253
    Likes Received:
    1,381
    Faith:
    Baptist
    I should have read the other replies before I replied.

    Yeah, Wanderer. If your marriage is bad, then the crush is simply the fruit. I don't want to assume too much. Ask God to send the counselor. I hope both parties are willing to seek counseling. (And it's no shame.)
     
  8. Internet Theologian

    Internet Theologian Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Nov 7, 2015
    Messages:
    2,223
    Likes Received:
    991
    Putting it in biblical language, it is called 'the lust of the flesh'. Don't let it destroy you, and it will if you give in. Read Proverbs 6 & Proverbs 7.
     
    • Agree Agree x 1
  9. th1bill

    th1bill Well-Known Member
    Site Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 20, 2009
    Messages:
    1,029
    Likes Received:
    30
    Faith:
    Baptist
    At seventy-one and only saved when forty-five and having spent way to much time in front of idol seeking women, I have been there and let me eplain what I found.

    I had married 3 women before my conversion and with each te labor required to overcome the results of the previous marriage(s) became progressively more difficult.

    As preferred by our LORD forgiveness is much better than divorce. You will carry all of the Trash accumulated in your first marriage into the second one because you are a man, just like the rest of us. Please, in the name of our God I ask you, begin to heal what you contracted, before God, to do and live in the Joy only God can bestow.
     
Loading...