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Spanish Socialist party wants to grant human rights to apes....

Discussion in '2006 Archive' started by Bro. Curtis, Apr 26, 2006.

  1. Bro. Curtis

    Bro. Curtis <img src =/curtis.gif>
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    LINK

    The Spanish Socialist Party will introduce a bill in the Congress of Deputies calling for "the immediate inclusion of (simians) in the category of persons, and that they be given the moral and legal protection that currently are only enjoyed by human beings." The PSOE's justification is that humans share 98.4% of our genes with chimpanzees, 97.7% with gorillas, and 96.4% with orangutans....

    Wonder if they'll be able to get abortions, now.
     
  2. Magnetic Poles

    Magnetic Poles New Member

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    Maybe the following will become law:

    A marriage will be redefined as a union of one man or woman, and one ape of the opposite gender.

    Conservatives will demand the apes wear clothing in public.

    Liberals will demand the apes get free health care.

    You will not be allowed to discriminate in employment by not hiring an ape.

    In the name of equality, restaurants will be required to serve bananas at every meal.

    Human beings will be considered handicapped, since they (well, most anyway), cannot peel their bananas with their feet.

    Monkeys, lemurs and other primates will demonstrate in the streets of Madrid to gain the same rights that apes have attained.

    Rupert Murdoch will roll out "Fox Ape Network", all right wing news delivered in grunts and gestures.

    Restrooms will be equipped with "flinging" stalls.

    Your doctor will ask if you have had a friend pick parasites off of you lately.
     
  3. Bro. Curtis

    Bro. Curtis <img src =/curtis.gif>
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    I love this line.....

    "the same as those of minors and the mentally handicapped of our species.

    Hope those apes never read about Terry Schiavo...
     
  4. gtbuzzarp

    gtbuzzarp New Member

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    Is this a legit news source? This seems like it should be more under the "Clean Humor" forum [​IMG] .

    Wonder if PETA has anything to do with it.

    Here's a response to the bill on the same website:
    LINK

    When Do The Monkeys Get To Vote?
    Ignacio Villa

    After learning of the Socialist Party’s interest in passing a parliamentary initiative that would equate men with monkeys, the obvious question is: are monkeys going to be allowed to vote in the next general elections? Knowing the socialists, all this interest in caring for simian has to have electoral echo among chimpanzees. It sounds like a joke, but sadly it is not. We have an administration that reduces individual freedom, disdains life and attacks the family. But wait… it has time enough to ensure primates get their due in Parliament....
     
  5. The Galatian

    The Galatian Active Member

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    We are somewhat more progressive than the Spanish in that regard. Here, they control the White House and both Houses of Congress.
     
  6. Magnetic Poles

    Magnetic Poles New Member

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    We are somewhat more progressive than the Spanish in that regard. Here, they control the White House and both Houses of Congress. </font>[/QUOTE][​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG]
     
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