Spanking

While the Bible does not say, "spare the rod and spoil the child", it does speak of correcting and disciplining children. That's includes spanking.

Spanking should never be the first resort, unless it's a repeat offense or a serious offense or an offense that warrants a spanking. Many times, especially with young children, just look or a word to "stop" and have them repeat the rule about why that particular behavior isn't acceptable or an authoritative word can stop a behavior in its tracks. Other times, the spanking is the only course of action.






And spanking, in my opinion,

• should never be done by an angry adult.
• should never be anywhere except the "padded" part of the body (over the clothes) or the back of the leg and by a custodial parent or other assigned caretaker
• should never be done with an instrument that could leave bruising or cause emotional harm (such as being beaten with a pvc pipe as some Christian authors suggest)
• should ideally be done with the palm of the hand
• should come to a stop when a child gets older and other disciplinary tactics, such as taking away privileges, get much stronger results

Also, for some children, spanking does NOT work. The abused child, the neglected child, the emotional disturbed child, the handicapped child, and more. And if you find yourself spanking the same child for the same offense over and over - or spanking for EVERY tiny infraction - then it isn't the child who has a problem, it's the adult.

Some children respond better to other tactics while other children can receive the occasional spanking and their behavior improves.

I believe spanking is supported by the Bible, yet I also believe that discipline includes practicing the correct behavior until it is learned.

For example - at school every year, we have many procedures. There are proper ways to go to the locker, sharpen a pencil without disturbing the class, behave in the lunchroom, pass out papers, walk in hall and more. We practice these things over and over. And the go over the rules - not just on the first day, but for many days. Otherwise, chaos reigns. Helping a child to become grounded in the right behavior until they understand and understand WHY the right behavior is right prevents a LOT of spanking and punishments down the road.

Parenting should be the same way. If you don't want you two-year-old throwing food at the table, then make a fun game out of practicing the correct way to pick up food and put it in one's mouth. And practice it often.

If you don't want your teenager to be rude and disrespectful, then practice respectful speech habits - talk about speech and what makes the way we talk to each other respectful and/or disrespectful.

Good behavior doesn't just "happen." And you can't preach or lecture or scream a child into good behavior. It isn't in our nature. We must learn what good behavior is, model it, give all family member opportunities to practice it, and repeat it. Often.

 

What Scarlett said! :applause:

Although I do have to say that I had one child that I spanked a lot. Like REALLY a lot. For the same offense. But it was her problem. She was the child who would do something she shouldn't do, be spanked for it and as soon as I was done, she'd walk over and do it again, looking right at me. It was a challenge. I had to win. So I spanked her again. And again. And again - each time she did this. I believe we went 8x before she finally gave in and came to me crying. It was incredible!! But this is also the kid who is now 19 and an amazing young woman who is reliable, trustworthy and has a great head on her shoulders! But boy, did she ever want to become the youngest child - making it that we never wanted to do this again! LOL Fortunately she lost on that one as well and we have two more beautiful children.