Suicidal again

Today I contemplated suicide again. I usually just realized i am upto it. I don't usually mean it. Once i realize, i will be regreting. Do not condemn me. Rebuke me openly if I am wrong. If need help. I have not eaten for days.
I don't know to whom I can go from here. I need transportation to a safer place, I need the minimum capital to start a business and if God permits, a home to live in.
To whom can I ask for help? I want to take the bold step. It is hard. Dehumanizing and lazy too.

Advice me, help me and delete is my content is not appropriate.

The lord bless you as you do.
I am not ashame to share my personal document. One that need help does not keep secret. Of by any mean more is required, I will gladly share.