Women only: Abortion

[Rachel]

Originally posted by Elnora:
I don't understand and I'm a woman. Good question John and C4K.

I agree.

 

[Thankful]

I know many families that are adopting children of different races. I don't think they need to explain to anyone why they have a child of a different race. Most people who adopt children consider those adopted children their own children and do not explain to everyone they meet, "This is not my child. I adopted him. He is really my son's child or my daughter's child, etc. etc.

I know a family that has adopted Russian children, Korean Children, a Chinese girl, and have three biological children. They are all their children. I would imagine that it would be the same if a woman is raped. She would keep this child and there would be no need to explain to anyone why the child looks different from her other children.

It always bothers me when parents have to explain to total strangers that their children are adopted.

 

[Glory-to-God]

Race does come in to play however, as you admitted above. This may not be racism, but is certainly not seeing all people the same.

I agree...we are not the ones with the problem with race...society is. And for the childs well being and my other children...we would need to take that all into consideration.

I never said we wouldn't raise a biracial child due to rape...I just said if we didn't then we would do option 2. what is so wrong with that?

 

[Rachel]

Well said Thankful!

 

[NaasPreacher (C4K)]

Originally posted by Glory-to-God:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Race does come in to play however, as you admitted above. This may not be racism, but is certainly not seeing all people the same.

I agree...we are not the ones with the problem with race...society is. And for the childs well being and my other children...we would need to take that all into consideration.

I never said we wouldn't raise a biracial child due to rape...I just said if we didn't then we would do option 2. what is so wrong with that? </font>[/QUOTE]My family would gladly accept a "bi-racial" child and it would have no affect on that child growing up. This would be our child and that is all that would matter.

 

[Glory-to-God]

Being the product of rape or the product of adoption are two differnt things. If someone asked you is your child adopted ( since clearly he doesn't look like you and your husband ) what are you going to say no he is ours.

You don't think they are going to walk away saying things....like well she must have had an affair. If that happens enough....which it WILL. Then the child gets bullied at school. Even if you admit privately to someone no I was rapped....gossips still will make sure it got out and you have the same problems....that all I am saying.

Something to seriously consider more than if the child was the same race as you....you wouldn't have to explain. This is just a fact not an opinion.

 

[Glory-to-God]

My family would gladly accept a "bi-racial" child and it would have no affect on that child growing up. This would be our child and that is all that would matter.

That is totally fine for anyone who is willing to admit when someone asked where that child came from or you could lie. those are the two options you have.....but if you are honest like all Christians should be....you will have problems guarenteed.

 

[Thankful]

Well, my mother was very fair and blond. She had a sister that was very fair and blond. She had a sister and a brother who had black hair and dark skin. They all had the same mother and the same father.

Why worry about what other people think? Why would you have to tell anyone how the child was conceived? How many people go around and ask such personal questions? Now really!

 

[Johnv]

Originally posted by Glory-to-God:
Being the product of rape or the product of adoption are two differnt things. If someone asked you is your child adopted ( since clearly he doesn't look like you and your husband ) what are you going to say no he is ours.

So let me get this straight. You'd rather ship your flesh and blood off to be raised by strangers rather than admit to being raped? Isn't that what scripture calls the sin of pride? I'm sorry to be so direct here, but the rationalization truly baffles me. As a husband, I would have no problem raising a child that was not biologically mine. FYI, my oldest daughter isn't mine biologically, but she's in every way, shape, and form, my child, and she knows that.

 

[Glory-to-God]

This is a forum that throws " opinions " around like a batting cage.

In the REAL world and what I have seen dealing with people...is this is a real delema that one would have to seriously think about....and it wouldn't take five minutes to do it. I never said I would atomatically give the baby up....I said it would have to be something the whole family and maybe some Pastoral counseling would have to deal with and agree upon.

It's easy to sit at your computer and make quick snap judgments without weighing all the facts.

I agree with # 1 and # 2 and I gave my reasons.
If you cannot find some truth in anything I said...then I would have to conclude that all you want to do is argue !

 

[donnA]

I would think, 1. it's no ones business, 2. if you feel some explanation is required because your child is an embarrassment to you then tell the truth.
For my husband and myself, there is no truth in what you said. Our child is our child. People's opinions about me or my child mean nothing to me.
What about people who adopt a child of another race? I know a couple, white as white can be,and they adopted a little girl from China, and are applying for another child there. No explanation needed for them, their daughter is their daughter no matter her race or color, they aren't the least bit embarrassed by their child being a different race then themselves.

 

[donnA]

Originally posted by Glory-to-God:
I work as a counselor in a Christian pregnancy crises center...counseling women and families. And the majority would differ with you and side with me.

But then again they are not people on a board who are set out to prove one wrong are they ?

It has nothing to do with it being on a board. No christian love and compassion is the same no matter where you work or live. I have known several women before who had children after rape, and I don't know a single one who gave their child away or killed it. They all loved their child because it was their child.
A person who can't love their own child has a problem.

 

[donnA]

I'd like to see some scriptural bases for GTG's opinion.

 

[donnA]

Doing whats right is sometimes costly to us. We can not neglect whats right just because we want too, or someone else wants us too, or, my goodness, what would people think if I did what was right.

 

[Brice]

Originally posted by Glory-to-God:
Being the product of rape or the product of adoption are two differnt things. If someone asked you is your child adopted ( since clearly he doesn't look like you and your husband ) what are you going to say no he is ours.

You don't think they are going to walk away saying things....like well she must have had an affair.
Something to seriously consider more than if the child was the same race as you....you wouldn't have to explain. This is just a fact not an opinion.

From another thread -

Originally posted by Glory-to-God:
Hey Frogman I cannot worry or be responsible for the way people take things!....it is not MY fault if someone doesn't agree with me....

I care what people think. No wait, I don't care what people think. No wait, I do care. No wait I don't. Ah just forget it.

 

[Glory-to-God]

See personal attack I just reported you Brice.

Anyway back to Donna saying if she was raped that her husband wouldn't care it is HIS and her's child. No it isn't HIS child it is the RAPIST child....believe it or not Donna in a court of law if the " rapist " could prove the child was his it would be his. anyway my point is I do not think your husbnad would be so comfortable with the idea of raising a rapist especially one who is of a different race child....that child would be a constant reminder of someone attaking you. I know what you say you would do...but i doubt it ?I know of more Christian women who gave up their baby due to rape than kept them. Statistics are much higher for abortion than any other option. Very few go through with having the baby.

To be honest no one knows what they would do if it happened to them till they actually go through it themsleves.

 

[Rachel]

Are you now calling Donna a liar G-T-G??


I know without a doubt what I would do. We would love the baby and not take out how he was conceived on the child. It's not the childs fault. The child isn't the rapist.

 

[Brice]

Glory,

I took your statements and posted them. I simply pointed out your flip-flop. Feel free to answer the post, but a personal attack? The obvious is not an attack, it's just the obvious. You said you deal with facts, well I just presented some; feel free to answer them.

 

[Brice]

Glory,

Hmmm, Let's think for a second. Donna says she would do something. You say she wouldn't. This implys that she is lying. So you called her a liar, therefore you made a personal attack. Therefore you broke a rule. Therefore you should be reported. Hope you see your logic.

You say you would not keep the baby because of what people will think. Then you say you don't care what people think. Doesn't add up. Feel free to read my earlier post again. Those are your word's.

 

[Glory-to-God]

So Rachel you and Donna asked your husbands about this right? I asked my husband what he thought and he didn't see it that way....he said the same thing I did. It would depend on a lot of factors and personally he wouldn't feel comfortable with raising a rapist child no matter what. We also discused all the other feelings and problems associated alone with just being RAPED. I said the statistics in counseling are that most women abort....most husbands are NOT supportive...actually most husbnads find it hard to EVEN have relations with their wives after a rape. So a quick answer that makes us look good and sound holy isn't reality.

Real life demands more study...insights....counseling...and taking everyones feelings into consideration even your childrens. It's not that simple....wish it was.

Rachel I would questions anyones answer that flipantly says oh yeah I would keep it and love it without any thought. Yeah right ?