You must be a Baptist if:

You can sing every verse to 'Just As I Am' without even looking at the hymnal.

 

you are posting in this forum.

 

You waste all your yearly annual leave
on RAIN DAYS just to avoid getting sprinkled

 

If Lottie Moon is a name used a lot in your church this time of the year.

 

If thought Lottie was a member of my church

 

You must be a Baptist if you try to figure out what you can use as a substitute for 'wine' in gormet recipes!

 

If your Bible is red but not read.

If you know the difference between a demon and a deacon (if you resist the devil, he will flee, if you resist a deacon, he'll cut your throat).

 

You must be a Baptist if you are on the committee to form a committee to study a committee on committees.

 

You must be a Baptist if there is a fight for the back row of pews.

 

You must be a Baptist if you disagree with the person on your right AND left on the pew. And one of them is your wife

 

You must be a Baptist... if you constantly have chicken grease on your hands!?!
Rick Sr.

 

You must be a Baptist if your church draws a "crowd" rather than a congregation.

 

Five out of four members of your congegration
have major problems with fractions

 

You must be a Baptist if you believe that you cannot do things differently, because it has never been done this way before....

 

You must be a Baptist if the phrase "the church I used to go to" often comes up in conversation

 

...if you are never wrong, it is just that sometimes you are less right than you thought you were.

 

...when you yell "amen" at a Town Meeting

 

...when you call the mailman "Brother" and you don't even know him!