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Is it wrong for a divorced man to be a pastor?

paidagogos

Active Member
I wrote the part Jim quoted. My point is that I do not believe that divorce always disqualifies a man from pastoring. To say that it does and that murder does not would categorize and divide sin. I do not believe that muder is less of a sin than divorce. However somehow too often a man is praised for a changed life from being a murderer to being a godly man and a divorced man is shunned by the same community of Christians. The fact is that God used at least two men in the Bible who killed someone. Each of them were leaders who were mightily used by God. Paul was no doubt a pastor to pastors and planted churches. If he was not a pastor then what was he?
I understand completely. Yes, Moses killed a man and God used him mightily but God also denied him entrance into the "Promised Land" for disobedience. However, it appears that we're trying to make a statement about the nature of sin as well as the inconsistency of the church in elevating one sin beyond others. IMHO, this is the wrong time and place to do so. I agree that divorce is the "whipping boy" of the church just as racism is the whipping boy of "political correctness." I am staunchly opposed to both.

Sin is sin. However, each must be dealt with in its own environment. This is the reason that I brought up pedophilia. I think we agree that this sin precludes one working in a children's ministry. There is precedent for considering that there are matters of disqualification. For example, the OT has several examples of men being excluded from the priesthood or other service unto God. It is not stretching it too far, IMHO, to hypothesize that it is possible some disqualification could exist for pastoral ministry. Thus, anyone who rejects the possibility out of hand is being rash and leaning on preconceived opinions or tradition. Now, the narrowly defined point that we must debate is whether divorce per se diqualifies one for pastoral ministry. From this arise many questions, many which center around our view of marriage.

Now, what do you think?
 

paidagogos

Active Member
Paid,
Thanks for your kind words. I have but a moment, and I hope that my schedule clears to respond in full because this is a weighty matter and off-hand, quick comments are not worthy. My comment about the historical position is if you read the commentators from Chrysostom to Calvin to Poole to Gill to the other Reformers, on up to somewhere circa 1900 or so (give or take), they unanimously exposited that this passage condemned polygamy. I can provide quotes from each of these if you like. This influenced thought for a long time. I am not saying I agree with this interpretation. I see it as a possible one but not the best interpretation. I see it as far better than the interpretation of forbidding all divorces and/or remarriages. That in my mind requires eisegesis. Interestingly, the so-called "one living woman" interpretation is a corruption of Chrysostom's orginal exposition. I am mystified when people trot this out. It would follow then that a man, who is unqualified because he is divorced and his ex-wife is alive, suddenly at the moment of her death becomes qualified again.
Usually, the issue is usaully debated as divorce and remarriage. However, God's original intention is clear--no divorce (i.e. no division or separation).
In general, I am troubled by the specious analogies that people use. Where does the Bible say the pastor-church relationship is to exemplify the Christ-church relationship?
I don't think that I said pastor-church relationship, if so I erred, but I believe that I mentioned the husband-wife relationship is analogical to the Christ-church relationship. This is supported by Scripture. Thus, it could reasonably follow that a man is disqualified as a pastor by divorce because his marriage relationship no longer mirrors that of Christ and His church. This is a reasonable suggestion.
I'm further troubled by the argument that if a divorced man is pastor, then he automatically loses any counseling authority or proclamation authority on marriage. Sorry...our authority comes from the Word of God, not experiences. If that is the case, then the man who has ever had a rebellious child loses the authority to speak on family issues. Or what about the man who is inhospitable?
Yes and no. A more precise term here is credibility, I think. Does a man, who has lost his wife or his child, have the same credibility as the man whose family exemplifies the Scriptural model? The Bible alludes to this when the man of God is to be above reproach and have his affairs (i.e. family, household, etc.) in order. It's rather like the medical doctor lecturing the patient on the dangers of smoking while puffing away. Although the message is true, it just doesn't carry the same weight.
A further troubling issue to me is the elevation of "one-woman man" to be the bene esse of pastoral/diaconal qualifications. I literally have heard councils ask the marital status of a man and then sign off when they get an answer of negative on whether there's been a divorce. God help us.
Yeah, I agree but the place to debate this is not when trying to determine if this is a pastoral/diaconal qualification. It sidetracks the main issue.
A final troubling issue is this concept of fairness. "It's not fair to keep a man out of the pulpit if he's been divorced." Sorry. The issue is not fairness, it's fidelity to Scripture.
Well, what can I say? Amen!
Well, I'm really late now. i do have more to add. I hope to get into the exegesis at some point, because that's where the heart of the matter lies...not in our logic primarily or our traditions. There is a place for reason, but that reason must be based on sound exegesis.
I look forward to hearing your exegesis. Although I have worked on the divorce-remarriage issue for several years, I am still not ready to offer an exegesis. At some point, I realize that I must bring closure but there are still a few unanswered questions in my mind (BTW, I have come to some conclusions).

Tom, I think we have lifted the level of this discussion out of the muck.
 

gb93433

Active Member
Site Supporter
Sin is sin. However, each must be dealt with in its own environment. This is the reason that I brought up pedophilia. I think we agree that this sin precludes one working in a children's ministry. There is precedent for considering that there are matters of disqualification. For example, the OT has several examples of men being excluded from the priesthood or other service unto God. It is not stretching it too far, IMHO, to hypothesize that it is possible some disqualification could exist for pastoral ministry. Thus, anyone who rejects the possibility out of hand is being rash and leaning on preconceived opinions or tradition. Now, the narrowly defined point that we must debate is whether divorce per se diqualifies one for pastoral ministry. From this arise many questions, many which center around our view of marriage.

Now, what do you think?
I do not have all the answswers but I do have personal preferences. It is very important to me to be upright at all times among everyone partly because you never know who's loking and it is always honoring to God. I pastored a church that had some divorced deacons and it was hard. I did not know they were divorced until a lady told me. They were very hard on divorce but I found it difficult to counsel a lady who came to me and she pointed out that some of the deacons were divorced as if to justify her actions. Personally I will not pastor another church that has divorced deacons for that reason. However I believe that we expect very little of most leadership in terms of proven leadership. In the churches I interviewed at I have never been asked about the men I discipled. In the early church I cannot imagine a pastor not making disciples and just studying and preaching. Every man I know who makwes disciples is a man who attempts to reach people and leads a transparent life. He is also a man who knows what he should be like as a leader and tries to do his best to love his wife and lead his family in a way that honors God. I know from my experience that the realtionship I have with my wife has opened many doors to families and counseling people in their marriages. Because I know that I have a great relationship with my wife I am not afraid of what she might say and what people might find out.

On a lighter note: A man I met recently asked me if I was on the tennis court with my daughters a few days earlier. I told him that the two ladies were my wife and daughter. My wife is only four years younger than me.

I am not in favor divorced people serving as a pastor personally. I think it makes it more difficult for the pastor and church. However I am not sure I can find them disqualified in every case. If scripture gives reasons for divorce then shouild that not apply to every Christian.

I do know of one pastor who is divorced that was asked by a church to come as a pastor. They sought out a divorced pastor because they felt a divorced pastor would be more understanding. He is an older gentleman and so is the congregation. They are far from liberal. The church has been doing well. I met with him a few times and found him to be quite loving and from what I could tell a very god pastor. I do not know the circumstances of his divorce.

The issue about Moses does not seem to be about him but about the people who did not follow.
 
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