Stay-at-home Dads Part II

Marco,

your salvation has nothing to do with whether you stay at home with your kids or not. Your salvation is dependent on whether or not you have trusted in Christ to act as a covering for your sin.

If this issue is bothering you so much than perhaps it is because God is convicting you about it. First you need to determine if this is God's leading in your life. Do you have a real reason for being the parent that stays home?

There are real benefits that have been found from the mom being the one who stays home, but of course it is for the children's sake. If you have very young children, my personal opinion is that its best for mommy to stay home with them for the time. Saying its best, btw, does not mean that its a sin if she doesn't or can't.

Older children, teens and such, I don't see any problem either way. But regardless, you have to decide if you have a legitimate reason to be the one who stays home.

I think usually we think of the husband as being the one who works in the world because he is the leader of the home, and he is the representative of his family to the world. His wife's main responsibility, in the Bible, is always presented as being the homemaker, the one who cares for the children and her husband. That is to be her main focus in the marriage. The husband's role in the Bible is to work (Adam in the Garden), to provide for his family, and to protect.

 

Raisng children is not a mother at home and an absentee father trying to make ends meet. It is a team effort of both parents and the children. Each have their responsibility. About 75% of those in jail have either had a poor or no father figure in the home.

When I read Prov. 31 I see a lady who has something to offer her family, her husband and society by her skills and attitude.

All of us should be constantly improving and growing in each area of our life.

 

I love Proverbs 31

Im working on it one verse at a time.

 

As pointed out above, this has nothing to do with your salvation, so don't spend another second worrying about that.

The I Tim. 5:8 passage, in context, is speaking of relatives of widows that are looking to the church for their support rather than taking care of them theirselves, as they should.

You and your wife are caring for your family. There is nothing in scripture that says the man must be the one working outside the home, although in 5000 years of known history, that is the usual arrangement. Of course, there has always been exceptions.

Also, as pointed out above, the man should be the spiritual leader of the household. It is your responsibility to ensure your wife and children are bibilically centered in what they believe and how they live.

If this arrangement in anyway usurped your role as the spiritual leader of the household, then you might have cause for concern.

peace to you

 

I'm wondering...following a thought of logic.....if the bible is ok with stay-at-home fathers....wouldn't he be ok with...say...female pastors?????

Cindy

 

No. The Bible is very clear on this in 1 Timothy. Elders (overseer, shepherd, pastor) are to be the husband of one wife.

 

My point webdog is....if we are going to overlook certain bible references about men taking care of his family....then why can't we overlook certain bible references about females pastoring???

Cindy

 

Both my mom and dad were at home most of the time. It was our work. It was a dairy farm.

The woman in Prov. 31 is a working woman. In fact she was a business owner which requires a lot more time than just simply working for someone else. She was an entrepreneur. She made herself strong too. She had employees ans servants.

Should women in America be buying fields and planting them? Should she be in the retail business selling her wares?

 

It's not expressly forbidden, but there's one verse that talks about a pastor being a husband of one wife. That would imply that it's a male-only position. This is one of those issues of local autonomy. Each fellowship or congregation needs to decide this form themselves. I'm SBC. The SBC forbids female pastors. I therefore adhere to it.

 

What references are there regarding "taking care of the family"? Scripture is silent on who should stay at home raising a family, and who brings in the money, and we should be too.

 

Cindy, that issue is clearly addressed in scripture.

I Tim. 2:12: "But I do not allow a woman to teach or have authority over a man."

I Tim. 3:2 "An overseer then, must be above reproach....able to teach..."

The issue is not about whether women should teach at all, or have any authority in the church, only that they shouldn't usurp the authority of men.

The "stay at home dads" issue is not really addressed in scripture, as far as I can remember. Only that families should be taken care of.

Nice try

peace to you

 

Marco

I raise my kids at home during the day and work at night (Yes, I am very tired). Staying home with the kids does not place you in submition to your wife. You are the head of your household that has nothing to do with who makes the money. It does have everything to do with what and how you teach your kids.

Look at it this way, a man with a job like a Dr. or lawyer that places huge demands on his time but makes lots of money. How can this man be the leader of his house when he is never home. I am not saying it can not be done but if you are always away how can you even know what is going on in your house let alone lead. On the other hand I know from experiance how being home all day gives you time with your kids. When I worked dayshift I had no idea how much enjoyment I could get from being with my kids all day. Five until bedtime is not the same as eight in the morn until bedtime.

Be the leader of your house and start with all the time you have to teach your kids Gods Word. Make a good Christian home for your kids to live in, be appriceative of your wifes work but do not consider her making money to be atority to make spiritual decitions. Once the money comes in the house it belongs to the family. You raise the kids this allows her to work and make the money, the way I see it it is as much yours as hers.

I work at night and stay home during the day because my job has a graveyard options. My wifes job only has day shift. I would love to have my wife stay home but we would never make it under my income alone. But I do love to be home with my kids and they benifit from me being there. My three year old quotes Bible verses and knows more theology then alot of adults. She would never get this if I would have put her in day care just so I could get some sleep. This was my decition as the leader of my house to run it this way.

 

I know it has been said but I must agree. Only Jesus' work on the cross affects your salvation. If you have been saved by believeing in the true Jesus Christ nothing you do or do not do will affect your salvation.

We are obediant to the Lord because we have already been saved, NOT because we are trying to become saved.

 

No.

 

I think having a hurt ego because your wife works and you do not is a sign of pridefulness. Hopefully stay-at-home dads who feel their pride hurt by their situation will take it as a growth opportunity.