Helen
I appreciate you sharing your personal experiences with your parents. It must have been difficult to live with your mother's abuse all those years. I am sorry you and your children went through that.
Let me point out one thing you said and show you where we are going to disagree.
You said, "Romans 1 tells us that enough truth is revealed to every man to know something about the character of God, which also then implies the reality of His existence. From what I can see in Romans 1 as well, is that it is what a man does about that truth which is the determining factor in his future."
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It is true that God has revealed Himself in creation, and because of that, everyone is without excuse. But, it is not what a man does that determines his future. It is what God does.
Why? Because every man on the planet has rejected God according to Romans 3:9-12:
(v.9)"What then? Are we better than they? Not at all; for we have already charged that both Jews and Greeks are all under sin; as it is written,
'There is none righteous, not even one; there is none who understands, there is none who seeks for God; All have turned aside, together they have become useless; There is none who does good, There is not even one;'
Jesus said, "Seek and ye shall find" but Paul tells us that none are seeking for God. How can we solve this apparent contradiction? Because we will seek if God intervenes.
Jesus said in Matt. 11:27: "All things have been handed over to Me by My Father; and no one knows the Son except the Father; nor does anyone know the Father except the Son, and anyone to whom the Son wills to reveal Him."
To anyone the Son "wills" to reveal Him. Not man's will, but God's will.
and John 6:44; "No one can come to Me unless the Father who sent Me draws him; and I will raise him up on the last day."
None can come to Christ without the intervention of God. The Father draws, and there is a 100% success rate with the "drawing" because Jesus says of those drawn by the Father, "I will raise him up on the last day." Nothing about man's will. God the Father draws, we respond, and Christ raises us up.
So then everyone must be given that chance to respond, right? No they are not.
John 8:43-44 "Why do you not understand what I am saying? It is because you cannot hear My word. You are of your father the devil, and you want to do the desires of your father."
Jesus doesn't say they will not hear, He says they "cannot" hear. Why? Because they are of the devil. Notice they do not act according to their own wills, but they act on the desires of Satan, their father.
and John 10:26-27, "But you do not believe because you are not of My sheep. My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me;
Again, Jesus makes a distinction. These men did not believe because they weren't Jesus's sheep. If they were, they would have heard His voice and responded by following Him. So you must be one of His sheep before you hear His voice. If they are one of His sheep, they will believe...100% of the time. Why? "My sheep hear My voice...and they follow Me;"
You see, it does not depend on what man does. God draws, reveals, calls, convicts...etc. Man responds in repentance and faith.
Therefore, there is no "free-will" but human-will; enslaved to sin unless it is freed by Christ.
There are many more passages.
peace to you