A Plea for Civility

[matt wade]

I have already done more than my fair share of misunderstanding on this thread, so to prevent me adding even more, may I ask you Matt, are you suggesting that those (including me) who agree with the "plea for civility" are being like that Pharisee? If so, I must say that I, like others probably, was not saying: "Look at me! What a wonderful example of civility I am!" For myself, I know too well how easy it is to hit the "send" button too soon, and thus allow uncivility to appear.

But I realise I may have misunderstood the reason for your quote.

I did not direct the post at you David.

 

[convicted1]

The thing we all need to remember is that we are all adults here, and need to post as such. The snide remarks should be for the "kiddie" forum. Oh wait, we don't have one on here. :laugh:



What we all need to do is rejoice in our common beliefs, and study the doctrines that we disagree with from their perspective. That way, we can get a better handle on what they believe, and why they believe it that way. We are all Brothers and Sisters in Christ, and should treat each other as such. We are not the enemy, but one body.

 

[Skandelon]

I have already done more than my fair share of misunderstanding on this thread, so to prevent me adding even more, may I ask you Matt, are you suggesting that those (including me) who agree with the "plea for civility" are being like that Pharisee? If so, I must say that I, like others probably, was not saying: "Look at me! What a wonderful example of civility I am!" For myself, I know too well how easy it is to hit the "send" button too soon, and thus allow uncivility to appear.

But I realise I may have misunderstood the reason for your quote.

David, I have only ever seen Christlike brotherly love from you on this forum. Granted, you don't typically get very deep into the nuances of the debate and most of your responses are very short (which may be wise). But, I don't think you need to apologize for anything.

I second the motion for you to be a moderator! If you're interested I will nominate you. :thumbs:

 

[mandym]

This post is being directed at both sides of the issue. I read on the BB but post very little because of the bitter vitriol that is that is constantly being spewed from both sides of the ever going debate. Yes, labels help us distinguish where someone stands, whether it be Cal/Dog/Non-cal/Arm. We have all came to our belief via some path. As I read posts, I am often reminded of what Paul wrote:



And


I have grown in my Christian walk because of many of you and enjoy reading the well thought out posts that many of you make. I wish our debates could be as the Psalmist wrote:



And remember the words of our Savior:

Here is a prime example of why it is so difficult to have a civil discussion

http://www.baptistboard.com/showpost.php?p=1788506&postcount=81

 

[mandym]

And here is another example why we struggle to have a civil discussion


http://www.baptistboard.com/showpost.php?p=1788559&postcount=88

 

[mandym]

As long as people are going to continue to recharacterize what others believe differently then they claim to believe there will be no civility.

 

[Skandelon]

As long as people are going to continue to recharacterize what others believe differently then they claim to believe there will be no civility.

:thumbs:

In debate class we were trained to learn to restate the opponents arguments and come to an agreement on the terms of the debate before we were even allowed to continue with our rebuttal. It might do us all well to practice this here.

 

[mandym]

:thumbs:

In debate class we were trained to learn to restate the opponents arguments and come to an agreement on the terms of the debate before we were even allowed to continue with our rebuttal. It might do us all well to practice this here.

I do hope I am wrong but honestly I don't believe they want to. They like, desire, and long for their Westboro style debate tactics.

 

[mandym]

:thumbs:

In debate class we were trained to learn to restate the opponents arguments and come to an agreement on the terms of the debate before we were even allowed to continue with our rebuttal. It might do us all well to practice this here.

See they believe they are establishing some kind of truth when they do this. They honestly see it as righting some kind of wrong. They have just set the record straight and everyone should heed their words. See you and I have misrepresented our own views in their world and they are on a mission from God to set the record straight. If it were not for them everyone on this board would just go straight to hell. They have saved us all. Are you not thankful? Sheesh!

 

[Earth Wind and Fire]

Here is a prime example of why it is so difficult to have a civil discussion

http://www.baptistboard.com/showpost.php?p=1788506&postcount=81

Really! Im surprised that you find that particular post offensive. Im certain if you dig harder that you can find far more offensive posts.....however I take your point.:type:

 

[mandym]

Really! Im surprised that you find that particular post offensive. Im certain if you dig harder that you can find far more offensive:type: posts.....however I take your point.

What you really mean is that post is highly offensive and the person should be banned.

 

[kyredneck]

Really! Im surprised that you find that particular post offensive......

Some people carry their feelings around in their hands and should never be participating on a debate forum to begin with.

I failed to find the least bit of fault with the post that offended him.

 

[mandym]

Some people carry their feelings around in their hands and shouldn't be participating on a debate forum to begin with.

I failed to find the least bit of fault with the post that offended him.

So what your saying is that post I linked to was very offensive and moderation action should be taken.

 

[DiamondLady]

There are people on this BB who would argue with a brick wall and find grave offense with the fact that the wall refuses to answer them.

Then there is the group of people who need to go find a telephone pole and argue with it, the pole would at least listen to them.

I simply do not participate in many, many, many of the subjects on here and carefully participate in the ones I even bother to read. It's just not worth the effort to get upset over something so trivial. I learned long ago that you are not going to change someone's mindset unless they want it changed. Spending time arguing accomplishes very little and life is far too short to waste it arguing on a bulletin board.

 

[kyredneck]

So what your saying is that post I linked to was very offensive and moderation action should be taken.

What I am saying is you got your feelings hurt from what YOU percieved to be a misrepresentation on GLF's part; I didn't percieve it that way, he was making a point much as you are here.

 

[mandym]

What I am saying is you got your feelings hurt from what YOU percieved to be a misrepresentation on GLF's part; I didn't percieve it that way, he was making a point much as you are here.

Do not assume a disagreement means hurt feelings. (Probably another childish debate tactic) And it is not just a personal perception and is a huge habit on both cal and non cal sides of the argument. I gave him a chance to clarify and he only proved me right.

 

[Skandelon]

I see your point Mandym. I thought they would catch it, but I think it flew right on by.

Allow me to explain: Mandym made the point that we would continue to have unruly debates as long as we continue to misrepresent each others views. He linked to those posts as examples of blatant misrepresentations (which they were). There are examples of these on both sides, no doubt.

Now, Mandym is putting words in your mouth and misrepresenting what you have said to prove his point. We get upset with each other when we create straw-men and put words in the other's mouth instead of dealing objectively and honestly with their actual words.

 

[Earth Wind and Fire]

What you really mean is that post is highly offensive and the person should be banned.

Please dont put words in my mouth. No, Im saying that there are 2 ways to address a disruptive.....(1) Report it to the Moderator & (2) if the person irrks you then put them in an IGNORE Mode.

 

[Skandelon]

What I am saying is you got your feelings hurt from what YOU percieved to be a misrepresentation on GLF's part; I didn't percieve it that way, he was making a point much as you are here.

Do you really think we believe that God's will is trumped by man's? REALLY?

Do you really think we believe that man must save themselves? REALLY?

If so, then you do not understand what we believe. It would be tantamount to one of us saying, "Calvinists believe that God is an evil puppet master." That may be what some perceive the Calvinistic doctrine looks like, but to claim that is what Calvinists actually believe would be unfair and offensive.

I'm not saying both sides don't do it, but if we are going to get past the bickering we have to deal honestly and fairly with each other's views. I think that was Mandy's point.

 

[preacher4truth]

Please dont put words in my mouth. No, Im saying that there are 2 ways to address a disruptive.....(1) Report it to the Moderator & (2) if the person irrks you then put them in an IGNORE Mode.

Exactly. And make certain it's the person, not their theological beliefs, or because they happened to put up a thread about false teachings that you don't believe exist, and therefore go into prattle mode on the person. :laugh: