Anonymous Notes

Dear Aaron,
I will add that in this instance I very much disagree with you. That is because I have met USN2 and am related to most of the people in his church. The ones I am not related to share mutual relatives with me.
A little bit different for me than the usual anonymity rlvaughn was referring to.
In short, this young pastor is doing a great job and is highly respected. And I'll sign my name to that!

Karen

 

Don't overlook my key words -- "very similar"
There are definitely some differences.

I have never said anonymous notes were true or untrue. I simply said the manner in which they are given discredits them (true or untrue). Once again, the key to all of this is having a good assistant or secretary who never allows anonymous criticism to reach the pastor's desk.

 

And since it is just your opinion with little or no warrant, we will file your words in the same circular file as the anonymous notes

 

And since it is just your opinion with little or no warrant, we will file your words in the same circular file as the anonymous notes </font>[/QUOTE]I would expect no less from you, honestly. It seems you can peg people pretty good by the words they use. I am sure your people give you much more respect and love then they get in return.

NO DOUBT

It is All about grace...do you even have a clue?

 

This is pretty simple:

You don't sign it. I don't read it.

Don't overspiritualize this. Just because you are a pastor doesn't mean for some reason you have to read anonymous notes from people. I would go so far to say that if you do spend your time reading anonymous notes, you won't be a pastor for long.

And I disagree with the philosophy that you as a pastor have to "love" everyone the same. Jesus didn't offer being a part of his inner circle to everyone. He didn't even take volunteers. He chose 12 people who He thought could become leaders of leaders. As a pastor, I am looking for 6-8 leaders of leaders that I can invest everything I have into.

Some people will always be "anonymous" takers. I am looking for the people who sign their name and make a difference. You can spend your time trying to teach a turtle to run if you want too. I will look for the rabbit.

 

But remember, the turtle won the race while the rabbit .....

http://www.penguinputnam.com/static/packages/us/yreaders/aesop/index.html

Oh, and be sure to wait for the message at the end

 

Yes you should be accountable for the words you use.

And I will wait for the respect you should offer in the form of an apology for misquoting and overstating what I have said.

It is a bit ironic that the one who is accusing me of not showing respect is the only one who has used flammatory, judgmental and derogatory terminology toward people he does not even know.

Don't get so worked up toolman. All is fun and games on the Baptist Board.

 

Now there is a man who gets it.

 

He certainly can't be coerced into revealing the contents, but he can't be properly advised in a proper response without doing so, and, being a novice, could probably use some help in discerning the truth in it.

 

In other words, you're only approachable if I coddle you and team-up with you in your struggle against this ridiculous, gutless, disgruntled, bitter, selfish, jealous, shady saboteur (your appraisal, not mine)?

Are these the words of a friend? In all your protests about the anonymous criticism you've received, you've done just what you condemned the author for. You assassinated his character, and that quite behind his back. (It could be a "her", I don't know, but proper English uses a masculine form of the singular pronoun here.) Before we even know what the content of the message is, you played the part of a detractor and attempted to prejudice us against him.

And now, when confronted with this, your "approachable" response is, "I have nothing more to say to you," nestled in a mock expression of appreciation for all my efforts.

BTW, it took me all of 15 minutes to write the post.

I don't know what kind of pastor you are or will be. I do know what information you've revealed about this incident, and that's the incident for which you've asked advice.

Judging from Karen's response, you are attempting to pastor one of the "family-owned" churches in Missouri. There is not a more difficult kind of church to lead no matter what direction you want to lead (unless you actually allow the "patriarch" or "matriarch" to do the leading through you). Add to that your lack of experience and you are probably feeling tremendous pressure. Rash responses are understandable--not excusable, but understandable. You won't keep many secrets in a rural church, and if the author of the note doesn't already know you've posted about it on the BB, he will.

And he will see that at least I attempted to give him a fair hearing before I jumped on the bandwagon to condemn him as a ridiculous, gutless, disgruntled, bitter, selfish, jealous and shady saboteur.

 

So, is the author of the note REALLY a ridiculous, gutless, disgruntled, bitter, selfish, jealous and shady saboteur?

 

Excellent!

 

Anonymous notes are cowardly. If they had an ounce of truth, why wouldn't the author show up in your office with scripture notes?

The BIBLE says:

This certainly proves an anonymous note is outside the orderly way we are taught to run a church.

Now, can we please stop repeating three or four words out of context and use the BIBLE in our answers?

Diane

 

Dont you mean misusing the Bible? - They are not bringing an accusation - they are not trying to destroy the pastor - they are telling you something bothers them - that it ticks them off

Oh yeah - Ive had experience where other people have submitted my work gotten an A - after I had submitted that work no changes and got a C

There are times when an anonymous note MUST be used in order to remove obstacles to the concerns being heard.

There is a lady in my church - she can barely write legibly - she's mentally deficient or if you prefer handicapped - When I was office staff - i would pass the notes on to the pastor - but the pastor told me - anything from this woman throw out - I dont want to see.

Ill admit the woman was very annoying and made a lot of IMNSHO stupid comments - at least the ones I could read were - but once she submitted an anonymous note - it is clear someone else wrote it for her; once i found out who. But the pastor jumped on it; and thereby averted a minor problem no one thought they had.

 

Closed by request of the Original Poster.

Diane