According to His word It is those who believe(trust) in His Son. Men have been trying to change that truth from the day it was spoken and they just can't do it.
Luke 10:21
At that time Jesus, full of joy through the Holy Spirit, said, "I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, because you have hidden these things from the wise and learned, and revealed them to little children. Yes, Father, for this was your good pleasure.
John 6:43"Stop grumbling among yourselves," Jesus answered. 44"No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws him, and I will raise him up at the last day. 45It is written in the Prophets: 'They will all be taught by God.'[Isaiah 54:13 ] Everyone who listens to the Father and learns from him comes to me.
2If, in fact, Abraham was justified by works, he had something to boast about—but not before God. 3What does the Scripture say? "Abraham believed God, and it was credited to him as righteousness."[Gen. 15:6; also in verse 22]
4Now when a man works, his wages are not credited to him as a gift, but as an obligation. 5However, to the man who does not work but trusts God who justifies the wicked, his faith is credited as righteousness. 6David says the same thing when he speaks of the blessedness of the man to whom God credits righteousness apart from works:
7"Blessed are they
whose transgressions are forgiven,
whose sins are covered.
8Blessed is the man
whose sin the Lord will never count against him."[Psalm 32:1,2 ]
I wouldn't be where I am today if it wasn't for many Calvinist influence, but they have not been able to take away from me what God convinced me of in my youth. That God does want all men to be saved and come to the knowledge of the truth and He isn't lying. So listen and learn from the Father through the words of Jesus Christ and believe (trust) in Him. I would still be trying to work for my salvation if it wasn't for calvinist influence in my life
Don't worry if you are not the elect or not, just come to Jesus and He will not cast you out.
John 6:63
The Spirit gives life; the flesh counts for nothing. The words I have spoken to you are Spirit and they are life.
John 14:24
He who does not love me will not obey my teaching. These words you hear are not my own; they belong to the Father who sent me.
You are right Psalms. The elect will come to Jesus. Coming to Jesus is proof that you are the elect. Jesus said, "All that my father giveth to me SHALL COME TO ME..."
If you can come to Christ, come! He will in no wise cast you out!
If you are hungry he is bread!
If you are thirsty, he is living water!
You might say, "I'm not hungry." Then I am not talking to you.