Biblical rules for women in society

My goodness Karen, thank you! Would it suprise you to know that on occasion I spend over half an hour trying to word one paragraph and then give up and delete the post about 50% of the time because it feels I can't say what I mean? It's nice to know that occasionally I do get it right.
Gina

 

Well Karen, I'm only 52 so I cannot honestly say I know exactly the thought process that went on that changed the 'thoughts' of the church about women and their role in society. However, if my church were to take a stand tomorrow and tell all women that they were to quit their jobs and stay home and be good submissive wives and doting mothers..... we'd lose a lot of members quite quickly.

The almighty dollar speaks loudly! Both to families and to the church. I would have to say I believe most married mothers work because they like material things and don't want to get by on hubby's income. Churches don't want to alienate those families so they softened their stance.

Now this is just MY thoughts on what happened and I don't believe there is any way to give a positive answer on this subject.

Diane

 

I think it's more than greed. Some (perhaps many) women simply were not made to be stay-at-home parents. They love their careers and the contributions they make with them.

Joshua

 

There are many reason women work. Almost all of the women that I know, work. They work to help support the family, because the husband does not make enough money.
Marriage should be a partnership, and it is not far to expect the man to pull the whole cart. You are supposed to work together toward a goal, in whatever way the two of you decided to do this.
I find it ridiculous for a woman to sit at home, while her household is going down the drain financially.
The children suffer, because they don't have what they need, the family struggles and marriages are torn apart, all over money. The poor husband often works two or three jobs, and therefore cannot fulfill his obligations and priveleges as a husband and father. He is either too tired or always gone (working).
Priorities in life differ for each person. Some are dirt poor, but still have a computer and internet! Some are poor and still have 100 channels on the cable TV! Some have new vehicles and have no money for gas!
I think a women that uses the bible as an excuse to let her husband work himself to death, is horribly wrong. What happened to the partnership, being as one? Paying bills is not being "GREEDY", it's in line with honesty. If a women working is going to make the difference, then she should.
Christine

 

Diane,
I agree with you there. I wonder what would happen if the said members did speak up.

 

The Proverbs 31 woman is a strong, powerful, in charge woman. I am afraid that many of our women today are wusses in comparison.

Try to abuse a Proverbs 31 woman? She'll wrap that man's head in purple in a minute, and still make him think he is a man.

 

Saggy, who's going to crush all those snails?

Christine:

It depends on what the bills are for! A boat? That car? Too much house? Credit Cards? Cigarettes? Eating out? Material things???

Diane

 

Yes, it does. But if we seek the Lord and keep our eyes on Him, He knows and reveals what's best in all things.
PJ

[ June 20, 2003, 02:13 PM: Message edited by: PJ ]

 

I love to watch The History Channel and I heard a very interesting quote from Hugh Hefner, of all people. He said that the primary thing that caused the morals to start declining is when the women left the home to work in WW2. (I wish I could get the exact quote.) Even a non-Christian admits that.

Most women are working to have all the finer things in life, at the sacrifice of their marriages and children. It may be ok to work if you have no children, but your fulfillment and career goals should take a back seat when you have kids.

I don't understand why a woman would want to work out of the home. I work my tail off here and never get it all done. There is always something to do. All men have to do is work. They don't have to come home and take care of everything and everyone else. Women already have a full-time job being a homemaker, and then if they have children, being a mother. I worked full-time before I had children and it made things very stressful at home, so my ex-husband wanted me to just be a homemaker. It was a joy to take care of my home and be there for him. After we seperated years later, I went to work almost full-time for a few months. Yes, I enjoyed getting out every day and loved my job, but my home was in shambles. The caregiver was allowing things to go on with my children that I did not approve of, they lost their attachment to me, there was all kinds of sin there in the workplace, etc. I prayed that God would make a way for me to make money at home and He did! My assistant manager needed a babysitter for his kids immediately and I got the job. What an answer to prayer!

God put the financial burden on the husbands after the Fall in the Garden of Eden. He gave us women the responsibilities for the home and children. I think that's what God will ask us to give account of at the Judgement. If a husband gets into dire straights, it would not hurt for the woman to try to find ways to earn money from home, but it should never be for them to keep up with the Joneses. Most of the time, it costs MORE money for the woman to be working away from home. In my humble opinion, most Christians in America have no idea what real poverty is.

hsmom3

 

If you want to be a stay-at-home mom, that's fantastic. But don't imply everyone else is out of God's will if they have a different situations, a different personality, different experiences, and different opinions.

 

With all due respect, I see this as a double standard. Either the woman should work for earnings or should not work for earnings.

I absolutely agree.

Again, seeking the Lord in ALL things is prudent.

PJ

 

This is true whether you are a man or a woman. You need to make sure that your kid(s)' needs are met. That doesn't necessarily mean staying at home.

Well, it's very hard to work from home and be a neurosurgeon or a soldier or an environmental biologist or a forest ranger or any number of things that people find interesting and fulfilling.

I found this to be true when I worked outside the home and as a stay-at-home parent. It always seems to be the case no matter what.

I don't personally know anyone who has a marriage like this, although I gather from the Board here that some do.

This is no more true for women than men. Everyone has a home to care for, and if you have children you are obligated to care for them as well.

This is most certainly not the case for the women in our church, and I think is rarely true where the woman is a skilled professional. Often, though, the issue isn't how much the woman makes but how much they value the challenges and contributions offered by their job.

This is almost unquestionably true.

Joshua

 

Tis true, from daybreak til dusk. After work they mow the lawn, fix the car, unplug the sink and a myriad of other things.

Every man should take time out for his wife and children; so then, they do have to take care of everyone else.

PJ

 

I believe hsmom3 is saying that a working mother still has to do the laundry, the housework, the baths, help with homework, dust, sweep, fold clothes, cook shop, mop floors and be mother while the father does a little to help out, if she's lucky......

I do not believe any woman can do it all and do it all well. She has to have help either from hubby, a housecleaner or some family member. However, most working moms just do the best they can. Lots of times the work load falls on a teen daughter.

Diane

 

Diane,

I think that culture has shifted enough that it is no longer assumed that the wife is the one who handles these things. All of the couples whom I know well divide these duties up according to who is getting off work earlier on a particular day.

Joshua

 

I'm a working mom, but I honestley feel that my best work takes place at home or at church. Much of what creates the "need" for women to work outside the home is a decision made early on in the marriage or even in dating that "We're going to both work and base our lifestyle on that income". This is a very natural thought process nowadays since women have a real choice about how they want to live their lives and can contribute equally or even more than their husbands to the finacial needs of the family. However, If the choice is made up front that the wife will stay home then life continues normally on one income instead of two. Different decisions are made, smaller homes, fewer cars are purchased, but life goes on. If only we were born with blinders to keep our eyes on the Lord and not on the world around us, I think most would be happy and content with how they could live on one income. Wish I would have figured that out earlier in life

 

The main "prohibition" in a BAPTIST church should be sin. Being Baptist means FREEDOM...Jesus exalted women in all things. He talked to women when no "godly" man would. He encouraged women to learn, he even appeared to women first after the resurrection. He forgave the woman "caught in adultery" hmmmm doesn't it take two???? Male pastors "tweek" the Scriptures to conform to their male ego and some are threatened that a woman just might be a more effective speaker and pastor.....Yeah, keep those women in a box, where Christ always put them. Jesus Christ gave women freedom not restrictions.

 

karen,

nice thought provoking post. i have traditionally been of the "one set of rules in church, another in the world" mindset when it comes to men, women and authority.

but i don't think this view is really biblically defensible, and now think women should willingly submit to men in both areas of life.

lol, likes there's even supposed to be "both areas of life". all of our lives should be fully dedicated to the lord!

it's amazing how many of my attitudes come from the world and somehow manage to survive until directly challenged (and even long after that, usually).

 

Well, it's very hard to work from home and be a neurosurgeon or a soldier or an environmental biologist or a forest ranger or any number of things that people find interesting and fulfilling.
</font>[/QUOTE]is life really about worldly self actualization?

Matthew 16:24 Then said Jesus unto his disciples, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me.

also,

Matthew 38 And he that taketh not his cross, and followeth after me, is not worthy of me. 39 He that findeth his life shall lose it: and he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it.

and what the lord requires for women is quite clear:

Titus 2:3 The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; 4 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.