Allan said:
There is no other way to refute than with scripture

- you lost me
What I mean is that we cannot use the Bible to argue our positions when talking about humanity in general. The subject matter in question is: Can God's grace be resisted ?
From what I glean from the posts, the Calvinists state that Irresistible Grace pertains only to eternal salvation, and not to the call to service or obedience (I may be wording this poorly, so you all bear with me and forgive me).
The non-Calvinists, on the other hand, are of the argument that man can resist grace and the call to salvation (and I understand this salvation to be the eternal one, not the gospel one).
We cannot use the Bible to argue these points, because the Bible does not address all of mankind. There is no Scripture that says the Bible was intended to benefit all of mankind. And if there is no Scripture to that effect, then applying the principles and doctrines meant only for God's people to those for whom they were not meant will result in an endless spiral.
Allan said:
Israel denied His grace (call to Himself, repentance, mercy) many times, thus we have a leg.
Israel is not mankind. Israel is a picture of God's true people, whom Paul calls or alludes to as the True Israel, made up of Jew and Gentile. Call it the church if you will, or the saved, or the elect, or the free-willers.
National Israel is a nation created by God out of one man, Abram, who himself was a Gentile and a former idolater like his wife Sarai. To this man, and subequently the nation that came out of him, Jehovah revealed Himself, and this nation was the only nation in the face of the earth in that time who worshipped the One true God.
However, their being a nation chosen by God to be His does not change the fact that they also came from a Gentile, and have the fallen nature of the Gentile nations around them.
Similarly, a born-again child of God, after the Irresistible Call to his spirit by the Holy Spirit, can resist subsequent calls because of his old nature. God did not remove that old "Gentile" nature. He added a new one. And these two are at war with each other.
Israel resisting God's grace or call did not cause God to declare them no longer His people. He punished them, yes, but He remained true to them all throughout the Old Testament.
And so Paul says: "For whatsoever things were written aforetime were written for our learning, that we through patience and comfort of the scriptures might have hope."
We being children of God, not mankind.
allan said:
Grace being resistable isn't about God not giving it, it is about man not receiving it.
Well, I might put it this way: "it is about the believer not yielding to it for his own good".