I know, and understand. That is why this topic gets heated so often. You (and others) see that in what I posted, and even in Scripture. Yet the fact remains that it is not there.I'm sorry but that is what the first paragraph says. I just can't see the point you're trying to make.
I'm sorry, but all you can do is read the words written.
It goes back to my earlier illustration. If somebody tells you the ink blot is a bat then it will be very difficult for you not to see the bat. You'll never be able to see it as just a random ink blot without first coming to terms the bat isn't really there.
That said, I can still (perhaps only) tell you that I absolutely believe and hold central to my faith that Christ died for our sins, He is the Propitiation for the sins of the World, that God was pleased to crush Him and God laid out iniquities in Him, that Christ bore our sins bodily, that He shared our infirmary, was made sin, became a curse for us, by His stripes we are healed and it is in Christ that we escape the wrath to come.
And I can tell you that I have completely and totally rejected the theory that God poured out His wrath on Christ instead of us, that God punished Jesus (or our sins laid on Jesus) instead of punishing us.
Until you can understand how I (and most of Christianity) holds both of those statements as true you will be unable to truly evaluate your own position.
And that's OK. I held to the Penal Substitution Theory of Atonement for most of my life, and to Calvinism for much of my life. I was no less saved, no less a child of God. That said, there was a lot of Scripture closed to me because of my own understanding.