Created to Be His Help Meet..

MamaCW · May 7, 2011

dcorbett said: ↑

I haven't read this book, but I have heard from two different Pastor's wifes that it is very helpful and thoughtful.

I see two distinct views on this author here. One accepts the Lord's word on "He shall rule over thee" and the other wants to add "seek to" into that verse.

It is difficult in this modern day to perceive the biblical concept of men being the head of the relationship. Ephesians 5 spells it out, though. I am the first to say that I am a strong woman, I was abused in the first marriage (not a Christian man) and after that, I was a single Mom for years and had to take care of everything. When I stepped back into the wife role, I had to pray over this scripture and let God do a work in my life.

I strive to be his help meet. (Genesis 2) I am not perfect, by any means, but I do make an honest attempt to swallow my HUGE pride and stop my ego from trying to usurp the Holy Spirit's guidance in my life - and let my husband be the head of the relationship, which is totally Biblical.

Debbie Mc
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Amen Debbie!

farmgirl2011 · May 25, 2011

I really like this book!! I will admit when I first tryed to read it as a new believer and new wife, I was taken back. I had been raised to NEVER submit to a man!! But as I have grown as a Christian and went back and read it again, I love it!!!

Another book I would recommend is Lies a woman believes and the truth that sets them free by DeMoss. :thumbsup:
:godisgood:

farmgirl2011 · May 25, 2011

mamacw said: ↑

amen debbie!
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amen!!!!!!!

ThatGirl · May 25, 2011

Scarlett O. said: ↑

DL, there are HOSTS of women who DON'T watch soaps, DON'T read romance novels, DON'T sit around all day on the sofa and they STILL live with grief from husbands who do not treat them like Christ treated the church.

DL, I'm taking acception with your last statement.

I do not find Debi Pearl's book abhorant because I am "liberal". In fact, I am not liberal. I find her book abhorant because there are page after page after page .... ad nausem......where she is teaching unBiblical truths.

This isn't about liberal vs. conservative.

It's about are we as women going to listen to Debi Pearl or are we going to listen to God? If you want to go point by point with some details from the book, I will. If you don't that's fine.

And....................

Sister, in no Hebrew lexicon on the planet are you going to find that "help" and "meet" means "right arm." Sorry.

The word "help" and "meet" are the Hebrew words "ezer" and "kenegdo". Two separate words. Not one independent word.

The word "ezer" (pronounced ay-zer) literally means one who "relieves, protects the one in need of help". It comes, according to all the studies that I have done, from a more primitive root word which has a idea of "defending, surrounding, relieving".

The word "help" is in the Bible over 125 times. But, the EXACT Hebrew word that is used for Eve, "help" or "protective relief" is found 21 times in the Bible. Twice for Eve. And 16 of those times for God, Himself.

Here are some of my particular favorites.

Psalm 121:1 - "I will life up mine eye unto the hills from when cometh my help."

Psalm 33:20 - "Our soul waits for the LORD; for He is our help and our shield"

Does this mean that Eve was superior to Adam because God describes Himself with the same word that He described her with? Of course not, that's silly. But it does show how powerful the need for her was in Adam.

"Kenegdo" or "meet" is only found once in the Bible and it used for Eve. It literally means "against" as in "opposite" as in "counterpart". Adam and Eve were different - but in a good way - a counterpart way. She was the ONLY creature that could be his "good" counterpart. Just look at their sex organs. Completely opposite - yet completely made one for the other - to complete the other. The same could be said about the personality, the make-up of the brain, and more.

When God said, "It is not good that man should be alone. I will make a help meet for him", He was not implying that the "help" was inferior. He was not deeming Eve to be an assistant, a household appliance, a "gofer", or a person who just created as an afterthought to be at Adam's beck and call. Adam and Eve BOTH had the same directive from God in Genesis 1:28.

He was not pointing out the deficiency of the woman. He was pointing out the deficiency of the man. Adam was created by God. And Adam was "good". God made him perfectly. From the way God made his broad shoulders, his brain, the reproductive organs, and his taller height - it was ALL VERY good. Then where was the man's deficiency? It WASN'T in his nature. That was good. It was in his state of being. He was alone. And God, Himself, said that was NOT good.

When Adam saw Eve for the first time, he saw her as EXACTLY what God intended. "A relief; a protective help that is a perfect counterpart". He said, "At last, at last, bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh". He did not say, "Good, I need some help around here. Pick up the banana peels, lady!"

Debi Pearl equates the word, "help" and "meet" as the definition of submission. That isn't what "help" and "meet" mean.

And her definition of submission is NOT one of as the church follows the head of Christ.

Her definition of submission is one of bending over and taking whatever he chooses to dish out. (I didn't make that up - see the quote below).

Honestly, DL, have you REALLY read the whole book? Did you REALLY thoroughly enjoy the unBiblical truths?

According to Debi and Michael Pearl - it doesn't matter what the husbands gives the wife - a fist in the face, a knife in a pregnant belly (yeah! read THAT chapter and her advice to the abused woman!! :BangHead, love, indifference, adultery (read THAT chapter again and see her advice on what to do when you husband is addicted to porn and/or has sex with other women :BangHead, kindness, gentleness, or scorn ....... you are to "take it" in silence.

Page 262 of the book (and this was written by her husband).

Why???

Because she asserts that it DOESN'T take a Godly husband to create a "heavenly marriage", but it does take a wife who will submit "Mr. Command Man" (as she calls him).

The exact quote is (from page 30)

Wow, where's THAT in the Bible. The husband bears NO responsibility in making a marriage work or making it Godly. That's kind of creepy, don't you think? Completely lets husands off the hook.

Her book is FULL of such teachings. And none of it is Biblical.

And it doesn't matter if she said a handful of things that are true.

I'm not going to take a cookie where someone put a couple of chocolate chips and about 100 tiny piece of dog poop in the recipe and pick the cookie apart looking for the chocolate chips. The dog poop has PERMEATED the entire batch.

I'll pass, thank you.
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I am familiar with Debi Pearl and agree with your posts and I am definitely not liberal. I think her books are very dangerous and not a true reflection of what God had in mind for a healthy marriage.

I thought your analogy with the cookies was funny and true at the same time.

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