Dating

[MagicDar]

Good idea about public transportation, never thought of that one myself Yeah, I posted the things that to me common sense would say or should I say "biblical common sense". Each person should have already set convictions from God on where they stand before dating, and do their best in keeping those. Heheh..see now when I was dating I loved the brain teasers, I loved doing things where I was challanged and my date was too because I learned about the person I was with and didn't just go out for entertainment (not that being entertained is wrong)after all I am a magician's wife/assistant -dar

 

[Joy]

Dar, right in the rules of the BB, it says that your opinions will be challenged. That is what I am doing. I am challenging you to back up your opinions with Scripture. If you are a Bible believing Christian, then you belive what it says and you know how to back up what you believe. It wasn't even meant to disagree, but to make you able to back up what you believe with the Bible. What principles from the Bible help you forge your opinions?

 

[Timotheus]

"mtompset," is "MagicDar" one of your aliases? For you seem to answer for him in a particularly detailed way, when addressing Joy2. Just wondering.

 

[extremebiblereader]

First of all i would like to say since i have been a member here i have only seen a few friendly forums....so now that i have that out of the way.
Thanks Dajuid...i take that as a compliment.

It took some work getting to this point.
In the Bible it states that we are supposed to be pure and holy...so if you are going to use that to base your opinion on this subject i am all for it but i always thought that holy meant being like God/Jesus, so if you are trying to be like Jesus (this is going to be a far out example) Do you think Jesus would kiss on a date if he wasn't married?? We are supposed to stay pure..in my eyes and what i got out of the Bible I believe that would be kissing before marriage. What about the verse abstain from all appearances of evil??? Kissing could lead to something else so why not just stay away from kissing all together appearances of evil. This doesn't have anything to do with what i am talking about but i am gonna say it any...I never understood The Bible says that drunkeness is a sin but not just taking one drink you aren't drunk ..but just taking one drink could lead to more and more to where you could get drunk..the appearance of evil was that one drink if you would have stay away from it in the first place you would get drunk. So in other words it is the same things with kissing don't do it you won't get yourself in a position where you can't get out of
I know that was really long and i am sorry for that i just wanted to make my point.

 

[MagicDar]

Extreme, honestly and this is not meant to be sarcastic in any way but an honest thought to your question. Yes I do believe Jesus would kiss before marriage, I feel its personal conviction on each person excluding sex before marriage since we already know that the bible is clear on that. I just don't think its something that anyone has to wait till marriage for unless convicted by God himself. -dar

 

[MagicDar]

Joy, you may challenge anything you wish, but the point still remains the ideas I expressed were simply ideas. I don't have and don't feel the need to back everything idea I have with scripture, we all know the bible says to stay pure and holy and the basics of sexual sin and what they are so my ideas were basically formed around avoiding those things. You really need scripture to back up brain teasers, and expressing moral stands with your date prior to the date?

These suggestions were not taken from the bible, they were taken from my head simply put if otherwise I will be happy to share scripture, in fact if you know of any that support my brainy ideas then please feel free to share them with me. -dar

 

[KeeperOfMyHome]

Dar ~ The Bible also says (1 Tim 5:2 KJV) but entreat . . . younger (women) as sisters, with all purity.

Until a man marries a woman, he should think of her as a sister . . . treating her with purity. This means their relationship should be innocent, modest, perfect:--chaste, clean, pure. I'm not so sure that kissing someone you're not married to would be entreating that person as a sister!

And as the song goes . . . one thing leads to another.

[ June 28, 2001: Message edited by: KeeperOfMyHome ]

 

[MagicDar]

As I said, its a personal conviction thing. I personally don't see it as wrong, if someone else feels wrong for doing it then you probably shouldn't do it. -dar

 

[MOTHY34]

DAR, JUST WANTED YOU TO KNOW THAT THE BIBLE SAYS IT IS GOOD FOR A MAN NOT TO TOUCH A WOMAN . AND THE LAST TIME I CHECKED KISSING IS TOUCHING.

IN LOVE ME

 

[Cindy]

Well, here I go stirring the pot!

I would probably have to agree more with MagicDar with anyone else. I think her views on kissing and handholding before marriage do reflect personal convictions and common sense and do not necessarily conflict with Scripture.

As for "not touching" a woman before marriage...Dr. Bob posted an interesting and highly informative message on the old FFF about what "touch" really means in that verse. It definitely doesn't mean just touching someone as we view it today, and as I understand it, it doesn't necessarily mean never kissing, either.

Certainly a young couple needs to set up guidelines and hedges in their relationship, and there have been some excellent ideas upthread.

However, I am also going to raise hackles when I say that I think a courtship *should* include some "alone time" with each other. If I could tell you all the Bible college marriages I know of that ended in divorce simply because the two people didn't know each other at all, it would astound you...and you really can't get to know another person when you're surrounded by a crowd.

Now I will shock all of you by saying that I personally enjoyed kissing my husband before we were married. We were both virgins on our wedding night, and I praise God for that!

I don't mean to make light of the dangers of physical-ness getting out of hand before marriage...you are all certainly right about that. And if you can't handle an innocent kiss without going crazy, then I suppose totally refraining from kissing is the only answer for you.

A big fan of kissing,
Elizabeth

 

[Grace]

What's the point of Dating? How can you get to know someone if all you see is the good stuff? In the dates that I've been on (before I decided that "The Dating Game" was not for me, most of them were very awkward and I wanted to go home much before the 11:00 curfew that my mom had set (like around 8:00 I wanted to call my mom and have her come get me. I don't know why I didn't. It was probably a moment of "well, even though I'm not having a good time, this guy IS my boyfriend and I should at least stay out till close to eleven, even if the only thing he's paying for is his gas and his admission to this park. I sure hope I don't have to kiss him.") Shortly after this "date" we broke up and I have been happily (and sometimes not so happily) single for 3 1/2 years. Some advice that I was given once, and this may not seem like good advice to every one, was "why should one particular person get all of your attention when you're much to young to do anything about it?" As for the kissing thing, I have personally chosen not to kiss a guy until I marry him. Again, this was a personal decision and not one that I think is for everyone because I know a lot of people who could not handle making a commitment like that. I want my body and my heart to be pure for the man that God has chosen for me. Until I get married, I am off limits. I've seen the price that someone had to pay by giving her heart to a man who had no intention of keeping it like God had given him the job of, and I can't afford that kind of price.
Until then, I wait for God.
Grace

 

[myreflection26]

Grace,

That is awesome that you are taking such a sronge stand...YOU GO GIRL!!!!

I would say however, that dating can be a refreshing experience too. For me I got to meet some very interesting people and yes I did kiss before I got married but that was something that I had wanted to experience. Sometimes it can be a good thing to wait till marriage for kissing and sometimes not so good. Depends on the person and the conviction of the heart like you said.

Again, you are obviously a great lady of God!

Blessings,
Sue

 

[Ars]

Grace, although my son is only 17 months old. Do you mind waiting around a little while?

 

[Grace]

Sorry Dajuid,
I think that 18 years is a little too much of an age gap for me

One of my Grandmothers is anxious to get me married off, the other one says "Honey, you've got plenty of time. God will bring the right person to you." Trivia: Which Gramma do I listen to the most???

 

[MissAbbyIFBaptist]

Grace, I just want to tell you i apreciate the stand you take on this issue. Praise God for godly young ladies! This world could do with many more.

Abby

 

[Dixie Girl]

Grace,
Like Abby I am glad for your stand on the subject! Keep standing strong!

Jessica

 

[AdoptedDaughter]

What do you do? What do you believe?

Here are a few tips:
1. Read the Bible
2. Ask your parents what they think
3. Do research, and
4. Talk to God about it.

Most of the posts are filled with very good advice. Don't rush anything. Courting is a very good way to know if you want to spend the rest of your life with a person. Adam and I have been courting for eight months (this Wednesday) and it has gone by so fast.

When God decides that it is time for you to be with someone, you will know. Don't just "go out" becuase you are trying to find the one. Often times, "The One" is someone that you already know, someone you have been very good friends with for a while, someone who you didn't think it would ever be.

God's timing is perfect. God will lay the convictions that He wants you to have on your heart...Trust Him.

In Christ's gracious love,
Teresa

 

[Matticus]

I personnally am not for dating because it does put unnecessary pressures on the people dating. I would much rather get to know someone as a friend than date them. The pressure to get too physical would not be there. To me, it seems that the only reason a lot of people have to date is so that they can kiss make out etc... with that person.
Basically, be friends first, and later more if God leads you that way

God Bless
Matt