I am involved in trying to advise a young man, and find it to be a fairly difficult scenario. Let me explain.
This young man is 20 years old, had been living with his girlfriend (at her parents' house), who he has a baby with.
He has no job, no car, no high school diploma, etc, and no one he knows wants to support a freeloading 20 year old
In short, his girlfriend's family has told him to either bring in a little money or hit the road. His mom told him the same, as did his dad.
On Easter he came to our church, without girlfriend or baby, saying he had a great desire to know how to be saved. He was in tears - not because of anguish over sin or fear of hell, or desire to have eternal security, etc, but in tears because things weren't going well.
So I shared with him that in order to be saved, he has to realize what he needs to be saved from. I explained sin and the eternal consequences of it, and the saving work of Christ on the cross, and that salvation is to the one who hopes in Christ for eternal life. He seemed to believe the gospel that day. I also told him that Christ is not a "this world only" Savior, in the sense that all his problems aren't going to go away just because he becomes a Christian.
Since then he has moved to his aunt's house, which is about 35 minutes away. He has no ride to see his baby, which he desires greatly to do.
I have been trying to help him by picking him up about every other weekend bringing him to his girlfriend's house to stay the weekend, then taking him back to his mom's house.
So here's the conundrum. When he's at his girlfriend's house, he comes to church faithfully, I am able to take him to fill out job applications sometimes. Also, we are near a bus line, so I can give him a few dollars for bus fare. But, regardless of instruction to abstain from sleeping with his girlfriend, they do anyway.
On the other hand, when he stays at his aunt's house, he has no Christian influence. I talk to him on the phone periodically, but he really just does whatever feels good. Not drugs or drinking, but just generally living for what makes him happy at the moment. He does not have the self motivation to beat the pavement to find a job, and has no direct, healthy, personal influence.
So it appears there are two options:
1) stay at his girlfriend's house and try to get a job (which they are ok with), be with his "family", come to church regularly, try to work toward marrying the girl - but knowing that he will be sleeping with his girlfriend while he's there (see 1Cor 6:13)
2) stay at his aunt's house, rarely see his daughter, fumble around without any direction, not supporting his "family" financially - being regarded as worse than an unbeliever (see 1Tim 5:8)
Is there an option I'm not seeing?
This young man is 20 years old, had been living with his girlfriend (at her parents' house), who he has a baby with.
He has no job, no car, no high school diploma, etc, and no one he knows wants to support a freeloading 20 year old
In short, his girlfriend's family has told him to either bring in a little money or hit the road. His mom told him the same, as did his dad.
On Easter he came to our church, without girlfriend or baby, saying he had a great desire to know how to be saved. He was in tears - not because of anguish over sin or fear of hell, or desire to have eternal security, etc, but in tears because things weren't going well.
So I shared with him that in order to be saved, he has to realize what he needs to be saved from. I explained sin and the eternal consequences of it, and the saving work of Christ on the cross, and that salvation is to the one who hopes in Christ for eternal life. He seemed to believe the gospel that day. I also told him that Christ is not a "this world only" Savior, in the sense that all his problems aren't going to go away just because he becomes a Christian.
Since then he has moved to his aunt's house, which is about 35 minutes away. He has no ride to see his baby, which he desires greatly to do.
I have been trying to help him by picking him up about every other weekend bringing him to his girlfriend's house to stay the weekend, then taking him back to his mom's house.
So here's the conundrum. When he's at his girlfriend's house, he comes to church faithfully, I am able to take him to fill out job applications sometimes. Also, we are near a bus line, so I can give him a few dollars for bus fare. But, regardless of instruction to abstain from sleeping with his girlfriend, they do anyway.
On the other hand, when he stays at his aunt's house, he has no Christian influence. I talk to him on the phone periodically, but he really just does whatever feels good. Not drugs or drinking, but just generally living for what makes him happy at the moment. He does not have the self motivation to beat the pavement to find a job, and has no direct, healthy, personal influence.
So it appears there are two options:
1) stay at his girlfriend's house and try to get a job (which they are ok with), be with his "family", come to church regularly, try to work toward marrying the girl - but knowing that he will be sleeping with his girlfriend while he's there (see 1Cor 6:13)
2) stay at his aunt's house, rarely see his daughter, fumble around without any direction, not supporting his "family" financially - being regarded as worse than an unbeliever (see 1Tim 5:8)
Is there an option I'm not seeing?
