I was going to stay out of this discussion, however, the OP had a bit of a change on the subject and perhaps the Scriptures will be able to answer.
First, to all those who have gone through the trauma of betrayal and suffering, be it physical and/or emotional, I have personally found the great faithfulness of God is not conditional. If one is a believer ("in Christ Jesus" as Romans states) then absolutely nothing can separate from the love of God, for sure and for certain.
Second, there is a difference between the humanity and the standard of God. Even in the most productive and useful ability, humankind cannot meet the expected standard, and growth is tied to service. Every blessing of tragedy and gift of betrayal is to be looked upon by the believer as "pleasing to the Lord." The believer should put every life experience into that simple yet profound phrase, "It pleased the Lord." For the Scripture principle is that there is nothing that touches the believer's life that ultimately is not for the blessedness of His name and rewarded as service unto Him. That a believer may have experienced very tragic circumstances should be looked upon as tools to serve Christ in a more perfect and understanding way. For who else knows first hand ramifications of such impact than one who has lived it?
Now the Scripture principles are presented by Christ in Matthew and paralleled in Mark, and they are presented to unbelievers not just believers. The passages cannot be understood outside of the Jewish traditions or they lead to the typical European thinking of Henry the VIII. Christ, using the typical Jewish wedding thinking of that day proclaims there is a single event and time in which divorce is permitted.
In our time, we would call it the engagement period (without the typical "living together" that most do, do). In the Jewish custom, there would be a great marriage celebration, but the bride and groom would not be sleeping together until the house was prepared. Then the groom would come for the bride and the two would be "one flesh." At that point, Christ said, "What God joins together, let no man separate." It is the principle of "one flesh." Before the "one flesh" one can divorce with no consequences according to biblical principles, and after, then the standard presented by Christ is that it should not be done.
Paul allows for the unbelieving partner to leave the believing partner in a marriage, but does not allow for the believing partner to marry someone else.
So, that is the Biblical standard.
This thread is a "what if" and it would be good to help folks understand that God doesn't hold "sin" over a believer as some punishment / reward system. Rather, He is faithful and just in dealing with believer's who confess. So, it matters not what "sin" in the past, present, or future that has occurred, it is the attitude toward that matter that matters. If one has as an unbeliever engaged in all manner of evil, that person is as Paul would say, "such were some of you. But now..." (1 Cor. 6)
Dear believers, live your life, "warts and all," for the Lord. Serve Him as He allows and leads. You may have disqualified service as a "pastor" or "deacon" when a church follows certain passages of Scriptures, but that does not exclude you from service. You are responsible to love the Lord with your WHOLE heart, mind, soul, and strength. Your whole self is to be usable for His glory - missteps and all.
DO NOT give occasion to the fleshly nor allow the enemy of believers to make of your life less than that of a conqueror. You are an ambassador for Christ, live the victorious life of principle and meaningful service to Him.
In no way am I "condoning sin." 1 Corinthians 10 presents the principle that certain things happened for examples so that the believer should use the example(s) to be careful that they do not fall into the same trap. Paul states, that the believer is to do NOTHING for selfishness or motivation of revenge. That as much as you are able, to live a life of inoffensiveness.
If you by the Grace of God have gone through the mud of this world and not gotten stuck in it, but have, although some may still cling and stain, been brought out of such a place, do not seek to return to it. Allow the Scriptures to renew the mind and heart, the Word to cleanse you, and God's strength become yours.
"Rejoice in the Lord" by Ron Hamilton:
God never moves without purpose or plan
When trying His servant and molding a man.
Give thanks to the LORD though your testing seems long;
In darkness He giveth a song.
I could not see through the shadows ahead;
So I looked at the cross of my Savior instead.
I bowed to the will of the Master that day;
Then peace came and tears fled away.
Now I can see testing comes from above;
God strengthens His children and purges in love.
My Father knows best, and I trust in His care;
Through purging more fruit I will bear.
O Rejoice in the LORD
He makes no mistake,
He knoweth the end of each path that I take,
For when I am tried
And purified,
I shall come forth as gold.
