Divorced Pastor and Deacons

[Brian30755]

Question:

A Pastor at a church has been married twice before. (His current wife is his 3rd wife).

Several Deacons at this church are divorced and remarried.

Should this be reason enough for a person to leave this church and find another one?

Or, should the attitude of the member be that this is between the Pastor and God, and between the Deacons and God?

 

[Gayla]

The Church is not following - obeying - what the Bible teaches.

I would seriously, prayerfully, consider finding another church.

 

[Pronto]

Don't know all the facts, would you be asking these questions if he had killed someone, served his time, and then went into the ministry?

On the surface there does seem to a pattern to be concerned about.

 

[Brian30755]

Pronto, let me ask it a different way:

If you had been going to a church for a while, liked it, joined it, then found out that the Pastor has been divorced twice, and that they think it's okay for a divorced/remarried man to be a Deacon.....would you be okay with it? Or should you go elsewhere, because they are not complying with the "husband of one wife" scriptures?

 

[billwald]

Yes, it is sufficient reason to leave that congregation. It is like hiring a thief for a book keeper.

 

[Brian30755]

Thanks for your responses. Now, let me ask you this:

What if the divorces occured before the Pastor and Deacons were saved?

Also, what if they say the "husband of one wife" scripture means "one wife at a time"?

 

[Pronto]

No, it wouldn't be a reason for me to leave the church. My church membership relies on where I believe God is calling me, not the marital status of the pastor or deacons.

I also wouldn't agree with the interpretation you are implying concerning the "husband of one wife" passage

 

[violet]

Originally posted by Brian30755:
Pronto, let me ask it a different way:

If you had been going to a church for a while, liked it, joined it, then found out that the Pastor has been divorced twice, and that they think it's okay for a divorced/remarried man to be a Deacon.....would you be okay with it? Or should you go elsewhere, because they are not complying with the "husband of one wife" scriptures?

I'd leave.

 

[D28guy]

"Or should you go elsewhere, because they are not complying with the "husband of one wife" scriptures?"

Are they married to more than one person at the same time?

No?

Then they are the husband of one wife.

Mike

 

[Brian30755]

quote:
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"Or should you go elsewhere, because they are not complying with the "husband of one wife" scriptures?"
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Are they married to more than one person at the same time?

No?

Then they are the husband of one wife.

Mike

I realize that there is some debate over what "husband of one wife" means.....but I guess that's part of the problem. If it means "one wife at a time", then there's no problem here. If it means "one wife" (never divorced), then should a person stay at this church where the pastor has been divorced and so have several of the deacons?

 

[billwald]

If a person was guilty of multiple child rape before he was saved would you put him in charge of the church nursery?

 

[dianetavegia]

Originally posted by billwald:
If a person was guilty of multiple child rapes before he was saved would you put him in charge of the church nursery?

I'd hope he would have been imprisioned for life or received the death penalty so there wouldn't be that possibility! Certainly, at least, he should have had a surgical procedure (NOT CHEMICAL) to prevent further attacks.

 

[bmerr]

Brian,

bmerr here. Situations such as the one you describe are due to the fact that Biblical teaching on marriage, divorce, and re-marriage has been widely neglected by the religious community in general.

The Bible is not silent concerning the issue, however. For example, Jesus said in Matt19:9,

"And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whosoever marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery."

In Matt 5:32, Jesus said,

"But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, savinig for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery."

Also, in Mark 10:11, 12 we read,

"And he saith unto them, Whosoever shall put away his wife, and marry another, committeth adultery against her. And if a woman shall pur away her husband, and be married to another, she committeth adultery.

We need to realize that it is not the authority of human governments or judges that joins a man and woman. It is God that joins man to wife. To be sure, there are as many different man-made laws concerning marriage as there are human governments. But marriage is God's institution, not man's.

In Matt 19:5, 6, Jesus recalls the beginning, when marriage was instituted, and He said, "What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder."

The only thing that ends a marriage in the eyes of God is infidelety of one of the marriage partners. Even then, divorce is never commanded, but it is permitted. The innocent party then may remarry, the guilty may not.

Due to the fact that God's truth concerning marriage, divorce, and re-marriage has been widely neglected, many people have ptu themselves in a situation where the "marriage" they are now in is actually an adulterous relationship.

I've got to go, but let me draw your attention to Rom 7:2,3.

Also, regarding whether former marriages were before one "got saved", the text says "whosoever". In John 3:16, "whosoever" means anyone. It means the same thing in Matt 19:9.

In Christ,

bmerr

 

[D28guy]

bmerr,

I the 7th chapter of Corinthians, marriage...and Gods intructions regarding its freedoms and limitations...are adressed in a fairly thorough manner.

I am assuming you would agree that there are only 4 possible situations a human being can be in regarding marriage.

1) Never married.
2) Currently married
3) Widowed
4) Divorced

In these passages in the 7th chapter of Corinthians God...through Paul of course...gives instructions regarding all 4 of these situations.

In vs 25 God says through Paul...

"Now concerning virgins:..."

And he then goes into detail regarding that situation.

In vs 10 Paul says...

"Now to the married:..."

And he goes into detail regarding that situation.

And in vs 8 Paul says...

"But I say to the unmarried and to the widows:..."

And he goes into detail regarding those situations.

Now who do you think he is referring to when he says "unmarried"?

Not people who have never married, because he specifically speaks to that situation in vs 25...

("Now concerning virgins:...")

Not widows because he said...

"to the widows and unmarried."

Whoever these "unmarried" people are, they are not virgins and they are not widowed. And if you check a concordance you'll find its a different word...with different meanings...that the word used for "virgins".

It makes complete sense that he would be speaking to people who are divorced. And what does God say?...

"It is good for them if they remain even as I am. But if they can not excercise self control, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion."

Again, there are only 4 situations regarding a human being and the issue of marriage...married, widowed, never married, and divorced. And in this 7th chapter, devoted to marriage situations, God adresses 4 situations... married, widowed, virgins, and "unmarried".

Meaning divorced.

Regarding the passages you quoted from the gospels, I believe I've heard people go into those passages and prove...biblically...that the situations there were situations where people were very cavalier about marriage. Finding some loophole for divorce just because the dude saw a better looking woman somewhere...or likewise with the women doing the partner jumping for frivolous reasons.

In those cases I would agree completly that the loophole does not nullify the adultery that is in fact going on.

God bless,

Mike