Evangelical Scientists Refute Gravity With New 'Intelligent Falling' Theory

[Crabtownboy]

Please tell me this isn't true!

As the debate over the teaching of evolution in public schools continues, a new controversy over the science curriculum arose Monday in this embattled Midwestern state. Scientists from the Evangelical Center For Faith-Based Reasoning are now asserting that the long-held "theory of gravity" is flawed, and they have responded to it with a new theory of Intelligent Falling.

"Things fall not because they are acted upon by some gravitational force, but because a higher intelligence, 'God' if you will, is pushing them down," said Gabriel Burdett, who holds degrees in education, applied Scripture, and physics from Oral Roberts University.

http://www.theonion.com/articles/evangelical-scientists-refute-gravity-with-new-int,1

Whew, it isn't you realize...but I am sorry The Onion brought up the idea. Someone will start believing this and a new urban myth will be created that ....................................

 

[thisnumbersdisconnected]

I am sorry The Onion brought up the idea. Someone will start believing this and a new urban myth will be created that ....................................

Only if it gets promoted on message boards, where such dense people abide. :laugh:

 

[Aaron]

Gravity, according to physicists, is really a curve in spacetime through which objects are moving in a straight line.

CBT must be a flat-earther, thinking of gravity as a "force" actually pulling on objects! :laugh::laugh::laugh:

 

[Don]

Only if it gets promoted on message boards, where such dense people abide. :laugh:

Or spouted on MSNBC, who will publish an apology a day or two later....

 

[quantumfaith]

Please tell me this isn't true!



Whew, it isn't you realize...but I am sorry The Onion brought up the idea. Someone will start believing this and a new urban myth will be created that ....................................

Here is your first clue: applied scripture and physics degree from ORU.

I never knew such a degree existed ANYWHERE.

However, gravity is still somewhat of a mystery. Physicists have not yet identified any particles such as "gravitons". At least not that I am aware of.

 

[convicted1]

Here is your first clue: applied scripture and physics degree from ORU.

I never knew such a degree existed ANYWHERE.

However, gravity is still somewhat of a mystery. Physicists have not yet identified any particles such as "gravitons". At least not that I am aware of.

Gravitons?? Aren't they enemies to Cap'n Kirk and the Starship Enterprise?? They're from the planet Gravititotish, with Gravitopolis being their capital.

 

[thisnumbersdisconnected]

Here is your first clue: applied scripture and physics degree from ORU.

I never knew such a degree existed ANYWHERE.

However, gravity is still somewhat of a mystery. Physicists have not yet identified any particles such as "gravitons". At least not that I am aware of.

Uh ... QF? Do you know what The Onion is?

 

[Archie the Preacher]

It is a joke!!!

I must agree with Disconnected, the 'first clue' was being published in 'The Onion'. The second clue would be the reference to ORU. :rimshot!:

However, QF is right in saying gravity still is a mystery. We - humans at large - have no real understanding of how gravity works. We're pretty good at measuring it and describing the effects, which is very useful, but the 'why' of it still evades capture.

But here's the fear: Any number of atheist activists will jump on this and begin yet another campaign of "Look at the stupid religionists!" In the meanwhile, some of the truly religious anti-science faction will take a page from the extreme anti-abortion faction and begin a terror campaign of burning down 'gravity factories' and shooting gravity physicists in the back.

You know, that didn't turn out as humorous as I'd hoped.

If the Lord called the Jews 'stiff necked', what does He call us?