Fellowshipping for Women

[iThinkStuff]

hey y'all

My wife has had a tough time integrating with the female cohort of local congregations for the last few years. There are either too many cliques, too much judgment, or too few opportunities to form real relationships with the other women in the church. This has been a genuine obstacle for her, as she wants to have friendships with other faithful women. I want to help her any way I can, but the dynamic for men is a bit different and therefore most of my advice usually rings hollow.

I'm wondering whether this is an anomaly in our experience or if this is more widespread in general. If it's widespread, what makes it so? And what can women do to find good fellowship within the congregation? ANy pro tips I can pass on?

 

[Bible Thumpin n Gun Totin]

My wife and I have found that for women, sharing a meal works well. My wife will often invite women and their kids over for a meal/playdate. Once the meal's done I usually do some hoeing in the garden, or some other outdoor activity, and the kids play together so that the women are freed up to get their gab on, or their crying depending on what they want to talk about.

We've had experiences in the past where the older women in the Church are unwilling to teach the younger women. We weren't able to find a way past that and eventually moved Churches. It can be common in smaller rural Churches.

If you find a Church where the older women are willing, and happy to teach the younger women, that's a good find. Same with older men teaching the younger. I didn't have to, but I was prepared to compromise and go to a Church that performed infant baptizing for my wife and I to get Christian discipleship like that years ago.

I don't know how new you are to Christianity, but for a Baptist like me to compromise on Infant Baptism in exchange for discipleship really shows how much worth should be put on the older discipling the younger.

 

[Marooncat79]

Several things

as stated before

also

invite them over for bible study and dessert

play dates for kids etc

 

[iThinkStuff]

Several things

as stated before

also

invite them over for bible study and dessert

play dates for kids etc

Thanks to both for your answers thus far. Honestly, my kids love the Bible and my wife loves to cook so I can't think of any reason that wouldn't work out. Well, maybe one.

Some context: most congregations we've attended before have skewed slightly on the super zealous side. I won't say Pharisaical, but pretty darn close. Suffice it to say, when you know this is the dynamic, you are predisposed to be constantly on your guard lest you be judged among the heathen. Even when on one's best behavior, said friendships had a tendency to turn sour the longer they were cultivated. (At this point I'm not sure if that's a feature or a defect)

My wife is one of the kindest individuals I know, and sincerely loves her friends deeper than most, but that has left her very vulnerable to betrayal in the past. Long story short, she has had several seemingly good relationships turn on her (most recently due to differences of opinion re: COVID) and the next thing you know she went from friendly insider to punished pariah. I'm not sure how common that is, but it seems to happen a lot for us. What I'd like to know is how to help her end the vicious cycle, and hoping there's an exit that involves fellowship with other believing Christians.