There is not a single verse in Scripture that says that God choose by foreknowing that you would believe. You even admitted that "foreknow" can be "someone" which is exactly what it means in Romans 8. Also, the term "know" goes beyond just knowledge. And yes, "foreknow" can mean to have a personal relationship. The know before hand. God isn't bound by time. He can foreknow as the passage says.
The word foreknow is proginōskō. Let's look at the verses where this word is used and see if they show a personal relationship, or rather speak of knowing something beforehand.
Rom 8:29 For whom he did
foreknow, he also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brethren.
There is no clear indication in this verse that it is speaking of a personal relationship.
1 Pet 1:20 Who verily was
foreordained before the foundation of the world, but was manifest in these last times for you,
Here, the word proginōskō is translated "foreordained". No mention of a personal relationship. In fact, it favors simply determining something before the foundation of the world, but making it known now.
2 Pet 3:17 Ye therefore, beloved, seeing ye
know these things
before, beware lest ye also, being led away with the error of the wicked, fall from your own stedfastness.
Here, the word proginōskō is translated "know before". This is obviously speaking of knowledge of doctrine and not a personal relationship.
That's it. These are all the times proginōskō is used in scripture. None of them speak of God having a personal relationship with us before the foundation of the world. They simply speak of knowing something beforehand. In fact, this is the definition given in Strongs.
1) to have knowledge before hand
2) to foreknow
a) of those whom God elected to salvation
3) to predestinate
See any mention of having a personal relationship with the elect before the foundation of the world? Knowledge is not the same as personal relationship.
Truth is, neither side can prove their view from the few times this word is used in scripture. That said, in the few verses it occurs, it never speaks of having a personal relationship, but simply knowing something beforehand.
Edit- A passage that supports my view and argues against the Ref/Cal view is Galatians 4:8-9
Gal 4:8 Howbeit then,
when ye knew not God, ye did service unto them which by nature are no gods.
9
But now, after that ye have known God,
or rather are known of God, how turn ye again to the weak and beggarly elements, whereunto ye desire again to be in bondage?
Note vs. 8, it says we did not know God before. How can you have a personal relationship with someone and not know it?
Note vs. 9, it says "But now" we are known of God. We aren't known of God until we believe, and this is the word "known" that speaks of a personal, intimate relationship. Therefore, God could not have had a personal relationship with us before the foundation of the world, although he could clearly know who would believe in the future.
So, this passage clearly favors the evidence toward those that believe God had knowledge beforehand who would believe, and away from those that insist it is speaking of a personal relationship.