Have We Forgotten How to Raise Boys Into Men?

[calebreedgordon]

Have We Forgotten How to Raise Boys Into Men?
http://calebgordon.com/?p=2752

I would love your comments (here and if you so feel inclined to comment on my page as well)

William Bennett nailed this one!

 

[HAMel]

You ask, "Have We Forgotten How to Raise Boys Into Men?"

An in-depth question for sure that someone in the right career field could make a career out of.

It seems to me that way to many men of today lack the ability themselves to emulate the men of yesteryear. How can they raise by example when they don't know themselves?

Those men who survived the Great Depression, World War II, Korea, took pride being responsible individuals. Not so anymore. I'm 66 years old and grew up with my father being a Career Marine. There wasn't any monkeyshines in our home. As such, I learned a lot from my father and when my son came along, peer pressure in school wiped out everything I tried to instill in him.

When my son turned 39, two years ago, he confided that yes, he should have taken my advice and went in the military. He actually admitted that he now sees that what I tried to pass along to him was for his own benefit but at the time, it just wasn't "cool".

 

[Ruiz]

A great book on this is "Future Men" by Doug Wilson.

 

[calebreedgordon]

A great book on this is "Future Men" by Doug Wilson.

:thumbsup: :thumbsup::thumbsup:

 

[J.D.]

The State school, moreover, basically trains women to be men; it is not surprising that so many women are unhappy at being women. Nor are men any the happier, in that dominion in modern education is transferred from man to the State, and man is progressively emasculated. ...RJ Rushdoony
http://www.ecclesia.org/truth/rj.html

 

[joey]

You ask, "Have We Forgotten How to Raise Boys Into Men?"

An in-depth question for sure that someone in the right career field could make a career out of.

It seems to me that way to many men of today lack the ability themselves to emulate the men of yesteryear. How can they raise by example when they don't know themselves?

Those men who survived the Great Depression, World War II, Korea, took pride being responsible individuals. Not so anymore. I'm 66 years old and grew up with my father being a Career Marine. There wasn't any monkeyshines in our home. As such, I learned a lot from my father and when my son came along, peer pressure in school wiped out everything I tried to instill in him.

When my son turned 39, two years ago, he confided that yes, he should have taken my advice and went in the military. He actually admitted that he now sees that what I tried to pass along to him was for his own benefit but at the time, it just wasn't "cool".

Too right this topic could be a potential career-maker. I am a reformed feminist. I know first-hand how feminists are behind a lot of curriculum changes and favouring female students over male students. I had to do sociology/psychology in my nursing degree and I quickly learnt to get very high marks "write pro-feminist". (Got too good at it.... have had to undo a lot of unBiblical feminist thinking over time.)

HAMel, by peer pressure do you mean boys having to deny their own masculinity to fit in with their own peer group i.e. males?

 

[HAMel]

Too right this topic could be a potential career-maker. I am a reformed feminist. I know first-hand how feminists are behind a lot of curriculum changes and favouring female students over male students. I had to do sociology/psychology in my nursing degree and I quickly learnt to get very high marks "write pro-feminist". (Got too good at it.... have had to undo a lot of unBiblical feminist thinking over time.)

HAMel, by peer pressure do you mean boys having to deny their own masculinity to fit in with their own peer group i.e. males?

The "peer pressure" first. In 1955 my father was stationed in Japan for a year. Upon his return he was ordered to do a three year hitch in Rochester, New York. I entered the 6th grade that year and all was well and good I suppose.

Back in the late 50's there wasn't any gangs, as there are today..., but each community and school had their share of "bullies" all with a few followers to deal with. Most of the kids my age really didn't bother me but the older kids, on occasion, would become testy. To fit in you had to smoke cigarettes and talk trash, act tough. It was just kind of expected by ones peers.

Denying masculinity had nothing to do with it. Quite the contrary..., we were expected to present a "Rambo" persona in order to not be considered a "Sissy" therefore having to fight our way home every day after school. Everyone just knew that my father was a U.S. Marine and I suppose that some of the kids just considered me the equivalent of a 6th grade Combat Trained Killer. But there was always some kid who wanted to try you. (It's kinda funny to look back to those days)

In late 1959 we relocated to the South (North Carolina) where that Northern mentality just didn't exist. Had we stayed in Rochester I would have probably ended up in trouble with the law. That's just the way it was.



Regarding the Feminists Movement..., I find that quite disturbing. Media is sending all the wrong signals.

What is really amazing to me is the number of women who are having themselves tattoo'd. One would think that a trip to Wal-Mart would convince any young females to not get one. Just looking at some of the older women would be enough to convince me. I've got one little tattoo on my left arm that is hidden under even my short sleeve shirts. I got it while in the military and as I walked out of the Parlor I asked myself why I got it to begin with.

Several years ago I worked at a Medical Clinic and was talking with a young RN who was thinking about getting a tattoo. I responded that I though she was a very lovely young lady and seeing as how she came with all the attributes of a lovely young lady there was not much she could do to further enhance her looks and for sure, a tattoo only takes away.

She seemed quite impressed with my flattery (which was from the heart and apparently no one had ever commented her on her natural beauty. She seemed quite pleased with my comment) and to my knowledge she never did get that tattoo. Good for her.

Yes, many young women of today are quite confused. The title of this thread could also include the raising of young girls into womanhood. What a mess this world is in.

 

[freeatlast]

Have We Forgotten How to Raise Boys Into Men?
http://calebgordon.com/?p=2752

I would love your comments (here and if you so feel inclined to comment on my page as well)

William Bennett nailed this one!

I totally agree that we need to turn boys into men. However in watching the video I saw it had Mark Driscoll in it. Anything with him in it raises questions for me.
One thing I see the church doing that I feel is wrong is to have women teaching our young boys in Sunday school class or any class when the boy is past the age of about 6 or so. The young boy of today needs a man's leading not a woman and the church would do well to have men teaching the boys once they reach an age of about 5 or 6. They need to learn from an early age how to respond to men and others as men all the time not turning from the holiness they are called to in Christ.

 

[joey]

Denying masculinity had nothing to do with it. Quite the contrary..., we were expected to present a "Rambo" persona in order to not be considered a "Sissy" therefore having to fight our way home every day after school. Everyone just knew that my father was a U.S. Marine and I suppose that some of the kids just considered me the equivalent of a 6th grade Combat Trained Killer. But there was always some kid who wanted to try you. (It's kinda funny to look back to those days)

Maybe that's why my boys haven't been picked on much either? :laugh:
You may have also learned how to fit in well with your peers because you had to learn to be flexible. I noticed that about military kids when I was at school. My city had a big army base and so I knew a few army kids.

Regarding the Feminists Movement..., I find that quite disturbing. Media is sending all the wrong signals.

From what I have read the feminist movement started out with some good motives. e.g. right to vote, right for good education etc. Then women who have trouble with men (for whatever reason) gained too much control. It is like an "anti-men" worldview is behind the scenes pulling all the strings.

*Family breakdown -> no good male models -> sons become weak/non-existent fathers -> their sons copy "fathers"
* men can't be at home because working too hard -> weak influence on sons
* "anti-male bias" in education (was subtle in my CATHOLIC girls' school and obvious in my secular University)
* far fewer male teachers (Australia), partly fear of being looked at suspiciously, education curriculum far more female style thinking friendly
* women heros in TV/movies, straight men fools
* experts' opinions count (Dr Phil) where it comes to children not the average male's.....
* have heard of extremists saying that men are no longer needed now IVF is permitted for g*y couples (one female Australian politician's partner is having a baby via IVF)

That list is just off the top of my head, I am sure you can think of much more (sadly).

What is really amazing to me is the number of women who are having themselves tattoo'd.

Yes I think it is extremely unattractive, especially on women. It does make the person look "cheaper" no matter how well the tattoo may be done.

Yes, many young women of today are quite confused. The title of this thread could also include the raising of young girls into womanhood. What a mess this world is in.

God in His mercy gave me two boys. The feminist viewpoint is being broken at my level. I am determined to ensure my boys treat women with respect but I am equally determined that they are going to be strong men who stand up for themselves no matter what.

 

[annsni]

However in watching the video I saw it had Mark Driscoll in it. Anything with him in it raises questions for me.

Why is that? I have to say that Driscoll is hard on men. He will very clearly tell them to their face to grow up and be a man. He's in a place that has a low marriage rate and high co-habitation and he very comfortably tells the guys to man up and get married - to get a job, to take responsibility. I really admire him for that. He's not perfect but I do think this is one area where he excells.

 

[Jim1999]

Aside from some people, Ann, Who is perfect? I like Driscoll too!

Oh I failed...both my daughters missed "manhood".

Cheers,

Jim

 

[annsni]

Aside from some people, Ann, Who is perfect? I like Driscoll too!

Oh I failed...both my daughters missed "manhood".

Cheers,

Jim

I HOPE they missed manhood. But I'm sure they learned what it looks like.

 

[freeatlast]

Why is that? I have to say that Driscoll is hard on men. He will very clearly tell them to their face to grow up and be a man. He's in a place that has a low marriage rate and high co-habitation and he very comfortably tells the guys to man up and get married - to get a job, to take responsibility. I really admire him for that. He's not perfect but I do think this is one area where he excells.

It is possible there is more then one, but the one I am speaking of is a foul mouth, blasphemer who I have no respect for.
Here is the one I am speaking of;
http://www.driscollcontroversy.com/?p=1

 

[annsni]

It is possible there is more then one, but the one I am speaking of is a foul mouth, blasphemer who I have no respect for.
Here is the one I am speaking of;
http://www.driscollcontroversy.com/?p=1

Don't read some website. Listen to his messages yourself. He is certainly not a blasphemer nor does he have a foul mouth. Yes, in the past he cursed but he was confronted and he repented of that sin. Listen to some of his messages. Here's one on guys and adolescence.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zxnPgXbiva4

 

[freeatlast]

Don't read some website. Listen to his messages yourself. He is certainly not a blasphemer nor does he have a foul mouth. Yes, in the past he cursed but he was confronted and he repented of that sin. Listen to some of his messages. Here's one on guys and adolescence.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zxnPgXbiva4

Ann I have litened to this man before but at yuor request I sat down and tried again and I got about 10 minutes into the video and he is what I said. He is a foul mouth, blasphemer. He has not changed! I have zero respect for him and he has no business in naming the name of the Lord much less being in a pulpit. My request to him would be please do not tell people you are a Christian. He can do his impression of a male Ann Coulter in secular venues, only more foul mouthed, but just don't associate what he does with Christ. He is a disgrace to the Name of the Lord. There is little wonder why the world is so confused about God and all he represents with a man like Mark Driscoll in the pulpit.

A leopard cannot change its spots and this is Mark Driscoll;
http://defendingcontending.com/2009/06/24/i%E2%80%99ve-had-it-with-mark-driscoll-and-his-mouth-now-it%E2%80%99s-personal/

 

[jaigner]

One thing I see the church doing that I feel is wrong is to have women teaching our young boys in Sunday school class or any class when the boy is past the age of about 6 or so.

Oh please. Wrong? Give me a break. It's good to have male teachers, as well, but children need good examples from both genders.

He will very clearly tell them to their face to grow up and be a man. He's in a place that has a low marriage rate and high co-habitation and he very comfortably tells the guys to man up and get married - to get a job, to take responsibility. I really admire him for that. He's not perfect but I do think this is one area where he excells.

Yeah, but his tactics are grossly abusive. Besides, his understanding of manhood is not just to get married and get a job, but also the uneasy male dignity, as well, which is the "machoness" that causes men to be abusive and irresponsible to begin with.

 

[freeatlast]

Oh please. Wrong? Give me a break. It's good to have male teachers, as well, but children need good examples from both genders.
.

I don't disagree with you in principle. The problem is they are getting it all from women and not learning how to be men. This is one reason we are seeing a rise in homosexuality.

 

[freeatlast]

Ann this is the true Mark Driscoll. He does not understand what it means to be a man or a Pastor for Jesuse Christ. Please read the article;
http://endtimespropheticwords.wordp...iscolls-foul-mouthed-lessons-from-chris-rock/

 

[Jim1999]

I don't fault woman teachers, and they are certainly not responsible for homosexuality. That has been around since Old Testament times, when men were the absolute leaders and teachers.

There is a medical doctor friend of mine, who grew up on the mission field with Baptist parents. She turned out lesbian!!!!!! If we really knew what caused homosexuality, we would have a brand new mission, and full time at that.

My Hebrew teacher in seminary was a woman, and a brilliant teacher of men; all future pastors!

Cheers,

Jim

 

[Mexdeaf]

I am quite personally fed up with men who refuse to take responsibility for their brains and women who refuse to take responsibility for their bodies.

I don't understand why so many single women think it is okay to have a "baby daddy" (or two or three) or how anyone who calls himself a "man" can refuse to be a father to his children by being a husband to their mother.

I guess I am just old-fashioned that way.