Helen,
you say,
Someone who is not abiding in Christ has never been grafted in!
I disagree.
Please Scripture.
Many baptists who hold security salvation doctrine, saying like as in Luke 8:13, that a person falling away is not saved in
the first place.
This is an old argument for about 400 to 500 years since Calvinism doctrine of 'the perseverance of the saints'.
Luke 8:13 louds very clear, that a person who did BELIEVED in the first place for a while, then when the temptation, and suddenly falling awy, because have no root.
You saying that a person has never been grafted in, as you mean that a person is not saved in the first place. I disagree with you.
Romans 11:19 tells us, they are broken off, because of their unbelief. In the first place, they were in the branches with belief. Then, they become unbelief, they are cut off.
But, Romans 11:23 tells us, God can put person graf into AGAIN, unless a person have to repent of sins again, and believing in Christ.
John chapter 15 speaks of the vine, about our spiritual life, if we abide in Christ, we are carry the fruits and produce. If we do not abide in Christ, and do not carry fruit, then cut off.
Obivously, any person who are abide in Christ in the first place, but afterward stop believing, and not endure for Christ, shall be cut off.
Both John 15 and Romans 11 are very clear speak of salvation. No way you can afford to ignore these passage. These are truth with warning. We must take heed what God's Word saying.
In Christ
Rev. 22:20 -Amen!