Modesty

if you haven't noticed, we are not animals, we are seperate and different creations. God made me this way is not an excuse.
Inital reaction is part of the temptation, how you react to this, how you handle yourself and your thoughts tells a lot about your relationship with God.
Some of you seem to want to place 100% of the blame on women, like you have no responsability what so ever. She was used for your initital temptation, falling into the temptation is up to you.

 

Aren't you contradicting yourself, corndoggy?

You seem to be saying here that a split-second glance is enough to be considered lusting.


The posts are coming quickly, but, Excellent post, Menageriekeeper. :thumbs:

And an excellent post by Donna.

I'm all for women dressing modestly. I'm not for men blaming women for their own lustful heart and eyes.

 

Lusting is IMAGINING a scinereo in your mind, then creating a fantasy around it. Going beyond that fantasy by pleasuring yourself in private or hitting on someone is lusting. A change in breathing pattern is often a pre- warning warning sign. This is my definition.
Some very good posts here

 

Well, depends on how you look at it I guess. Yes, I believe that you can lust within a split second. However, due to our nature, I don't think there's any way around this initial reaction. When we get older and our hormones calm down, sure, men act like it's easy then, like they've got it all under control... but when we're younger and the hormones are raging, no, I don't think it's possible to avoid this split second reaction of lust, we're on the same level as the rest of the animals with raging hormones. Did sin physically put our hormone-secreting glands into our bodies, as well as all the same hormone-secreting glands in the other animals? I mean, that's what they're there for, to produce this reaction, they do the same thing in humans and animals alike. I think that the only thing we can do is catch ourselves and have the mental and spiritual willpower to overcome these desires. Like I said, once the hormones calm down, it's nowhere near as big of a problem, that's why older guys and women don't understand. At least with older men, they probably felt out of control like that during their younger years, but with women, it was never there at all, so you could never understand, so stop trying to act like you do.

 

You're right, the man does have a responsibility. Part of that responsibility is to not place wicked things before his eyes. Therefore if he frequents establishments such as malls, diners, theaters, playhouses or churches, where women are dressing like strumpets, then the best thing for that man's spiritual welfare is to no longer frequent those establishments.

"I will set no wicked thing before mine eyes: I hate the work of them that turn aside; it shall not cleave to me. " - Psalm 101:3​

"For a whore is a deep ditch; and a strange woman is a narrow pit. She also lieth in wait as for a prey, and increaseth the transgressors among men." - Proverbs 23:27-28​

 

What?!? Don't kid yourself, youngster! :laugh:

Shows you have a bit to learn about women. :smilewinkgrin:

 

We both have hormones that provokes aggressive reproductive feelings. So yes, in this way, it's not so different at all.

I'm not taking up for anybody who sits there and stares longingly. All I'm saying is that, like you just did, that initial reaction WILL happen, so I don't see why women can believe that they can wear whatever they want when they know that this is going on.

If a woman put God above herself, she would recognize this and dress and act in such a way to minimize the temptation. Fighting this and blaming the men is selfish.

At least you admit this. If a woman is knowingly acting and dressing in such a manner that produces these temptations, how can you say that there is nothing wrong with it, especially if they are doing so at church? Dress and act in such a manner that is not tempting.

 

LOL. Yeah, you're right, some of "it" may be there, but it's usually not nowhere near as bad as what the men go through.

 

I was just thinking... I've heard stuff like this in regards to controlling your lusts fairly regularly, not just in regards to looking at women but also materialism and such, and it has always been amazing to me as to how many people who preach about controlling your lusts are pretty overweight, if not grossly overweight. It's pretty comical, it's such a contradiction. This person obviously cannot control their OWN fleshly lusts and they're spouting off about how I need to control mine, thinking they're above all that! Amazing.

 

It sickens me to see so many men in society place all of the blame on women for their own lust. If I look at a woman with lust in my heart, I am completely to blame. People never want to take responsibilty for their own actions and thoughts.

Sure women have to do what they feel is best before the Lord. But for goodness sakes stop putting all the blame on women. Men need to stand up and say it is my fault and take responsibility for their actions and thoughts instead of trying to provide a list of dos and donts for women and their attire. :BangHead:

 

Hey, I'm a stereotype myself... I'm a red blooded American male and proud of it! :laugh:

 

my pastor weighs about 145 pounds

 

YEAH!! We completely agree(includes my husband):thumbs:

 

I'm not saying to put all or even most of the blame on the women. Anything past that initial reaction is up to the guy to overcome. I'm just saying that I think that a Christian woman should never knowingly dress in such a manner that would obviously provoke such thoughts! There's a balance there, both men and women are at least partially to blame for that situation.

Since I obsess about diets, consider this situation... you have to cook a meal for a morbidly obese person with clogged arteries and Type II diabetes. This person obviously has a food problem. So what do you do... you cook them an entire rack of barbeque ribs, served with a plate full of fries made with pure lard, serve up a 1 liter glass of Mountain Dew, and top it off with a chocolate eclair cake. Now, this person has just commited the deadly sin of gluttony, and has damaged their bodies even more. Who is to blame for this situation? It's obvious that most of the blame should be on the obese person, as they have to control for themselves what they eat. HOWEVER, you should know beyond a shadow of a doubt that you should have never cooked that mess for them to begin with.

Same with the modest clothing issue. I don't think you can place 100% of the blame on either side. Obviously the person doing the sinning is mostly to blame, but my question is that if a woman is knowingly causing somebody else to sin, are they not committing a sin themselves?

 

from my husband,
don't blame someone else for what you do,

We've been married 27 years, and talk frequently and openly about similar topics as this, we have no secrets, and we do not lie to each other(he knows I'm one of the 25% of visual women).
According to him, the most sexy kind of woman to him is one modestly dressed and covered up, always has been, always made him wonder what was under it all. Now he turns his head and refuses to think about it. (scriptures tells us we have a changed heart and renewed mind) Yep, those old pictures of women are still in his mind, but he refuses them. he seriously has no desire to lust after women.
Those scantly clad women sicken him, he wants to tell them to put some clothes on, like those guys who wear the jeans down so you see their boxers, put some clothes on that fit.
he completely agreed with pastorSBC. If he dwells on a woman and what she loks like it is sin, and it is his sin.

 

Good for him... how about you? :thumbs:

 

according to my husband, the way you think a woman should dress is what would provoke him. so then how should a christian woman dress so keep someone like him(who prefers women covered and thinks it's more sexy) from lusting after her?
According to my husband, he loves the Lord, he loves his wife, is completely satisfied with our relationship and has no need or desire to lust after other women.
Apparently the Holy Spirit's power living in him makes a difference to him and his intentions on living a christian life.