New to forum - struggling and need advice

[jaigner]

If you want to know God's will for you and your daughters in this matter, even if it isn't God's will for another woman, you're directed by the Scriptures to go to your husband. It doesn't matter whether or not he is sure. Your going to him will prompt him to study it out.

This is just not true. God's will is not revealed to women through their husbands. Certainly dress for their children should be a joint decision, but the husband's word does not need to be final. In fact, in many of these cases, men are not in the best position to do so.

 

[mommy25]

Please take a nap or something.

mommy25, there's a private women's forum on here, it's a much friendlier place. After a certain number of posts, I think 50, you can request access. The posts don't have to be anything deep, they can be on any section of the forum and simply be replies to what you're having for dinner or in the coffeehouse section where it's just friendly chat.

It's a nice place to have when you're not in the mood for a virtual stoning.

Thank you, Gina. I think I might have to visit over there. I must admit that I did not expect all that was said today (I'm a little grieved). But I was made aware that I posted in the wrong spot too, so it was partly my fault. I have one other forum that I visit (on homeschooling) where there are Christians and non-Christians. I can't believe the difference! And that is sad! You would expect the opposite. I am just glad that my Jesus isn't as harsh and defensive when I go to him with wherever I am. Take care!

 

[mandym]

This is just not true.

Yes it is.


Eph 5:22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.
Eph 5:23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior.

 

[preacher4truth]

Yes it is.


Eph 5:22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.
Eph 5:23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior.

I agree. Our culture has rejected this revealed truth via ERA, feminism, popular thought, polls, trends, and other avenues of womens liberation. Those who hold to this are labelled control mongers, "chauvinist" (which simply means belief) and maligned as if obeying this were wrong.

Rebellion toward this is deemed acceptable and is an expected protocol, and all who obey are deemed as old-fashioned and imprisoned, as if they are missing out. Yet this is to be expected when one chooses to live godly in Christ Jesus. Such is the state of the church for the most part.

Of course we can also throw this out too, because liberal theology has taught us Paul didn't have the womans best interest in mind, and these were only his thoughts, not inspired Scripture.

 

[Skandelon]

This is just not true. God's will is not revealed to women through their husbands. Certainly dress for their children should be a joint decision, but the husband's word does not need to be final. In fact, in many of these cases, men are not in the best position to do so.

I agree. Every circumstance is unique and some people don't seem to understand that.

I do wonder what Paul's specific advice would have been to a wife of one of the Corinthian brethren who were "living carnally" by sleeping around, or one of the Galatians who were living under the law by trying to make everyone get circumcised? Would he have told them to submit to a husband who is living in clear violation of scripture?

I'm not suggesting mommy25's husband is doing so, but it just appears that sometimes people don't consider the specific circumstances when they give their "black or white" rules.

 

[mandym]

I agree. Every circumstance is unique and some people don't seem to understand that.

I do wonder what Paul's specific advice would have been to a wife of one of the Corinthian brethren who were "living carnally" by sleeping around, or one of the Galatians who were living under the law by trying to make everyone get circumcised? Would he have told them to submit to a husband who is living in clear violation of scripture?

I'm not suggesting mommy25's husband is doing so, but it just appears that sometimes people don't consider the specific circumstances when they give their "black or white" rules.

and sometimes the circumstances have no effect on what should be done. Most things are black and white.

 

[Scarlett O.]

Who best to ask but your husband? Here's my impression of the situation. I could be wrong, but you seem to have no personal issue with wearing skirts. Your issue is the happiness of your daughters, and whether or not yielding to their grievances will be an afront to God.

Make this a matter of prayer together with your husband and ask God. Read the Scriptures, and read time-honored, universally accepted biblical commentators on the particular Scriptues in question, like Matthew Henry and Albert Barnes. Praying and learning together on this subject will bring you close together, and you will be less tempted to react to your husband if you have a difference of opinion, and he to you. Pray for your daughters, that God will give them grace to yield to you and your husband as they've been commanded.

Aaron, this is a perfectly wonderful answer. I agree 100%. Couples SHOULD be praying together and seeking the Lord together on all kinds of issues. Is the husband her head? Yes.

Does that mean that he micromanages every facet of her life? No? Why would he want to? Does that mean that she cannot discern the will of God unless her husband tells her what the will of God is? No. And that's what I got from your first answer.

If I was wrong, I apologize.

Again, be wary of the advice you get here. This is a situation which can divide a husband and wife, and most here are not sensitive to that fact, or care, really. They just know their own hot buttons and care only for them, not the unity of your family in its service to God.

I care very deeply for the unity of the family in its service to God. I teach too many children who have horrible family situations. I have dear friends who are struggling to get it right and I see the pain it causes. I have no vendetta.

 

[Alive in Christ]

This was posted...

Originally Posted by Aaron
If you want to know God's will for you and your daughters in this matter, even if it isn't God's will for another woman, you're directed by the Scriptures to go to your husband. It doesn't matter whether or not he is sure. Your going to him will prompt him to study it out.

Utterly ridiculous.

Embarassing.

I guess the person who posted this would recommend that the poor clueless woman should seek her "mouth piece of God" husbands directive as to whether she IS or ISNT experiencing labor pains. :tonofbricks:

 

[annsni]

I forgot to ask - what do you do about swimwear?

We use regular swimwear but all of the girls really prefer to wear shorts on the bottom and either use a tank or a tankini that meets the shorts. We live on Long Island and have a sailboat and around here, summer is water sports and stuff. I really don't like the look of the "modest" swimsuits but instead have found pretty suits that fit well. Lands End is a company that often has really nice stuff.

 

[Skandelon]

and sometimes the circumstances have no effect on what should be done. Most things are black and white.

I agree. And the fact that you started your 1st sentence with the word "sometimes," and your second sentence with the word "most," validates the point I was attempting to make. Thank you. :thumbs:

 

[mandym]

I agree. And the fact that you started your 1st sentence with the word "sometimes," and your second sentence with the word "most," validates the point I was attempting to make. Thank you. :thumbs:

Maybe you should go back and reread my post.

 

[tinytim]

If you want to know God's will for you and your daughters in this matter, even if it isn't God's will for another woman, you're directed by the Scriptures to go to your husband. It doesn't matter whether or not he is sure. Your going to him will prompt him to study it out.

Be very wary of the "advice" you get on bulletin boards.

To the OP, be wary of Aaron's advice. [edit] ABCGrad is a wonderful person, along with Annsni.. and Gina, and Menagerikeeper.. Listen to them..

[personal attack edited]

As for the question in the OP.. The women have all answered it well.. I have nothing to add..

 

[Skandelon]

Maybe you should go back and reread my post.

No, I read it right the first time, and I agree. "MOST" things are black and white, but "SOMETIMES" circumstances need to be taken into consideration before blanket rules are blindly applied. We seemed to agree on that point. :thumbsup:

 

[Alive in Christ]

Tiny tim posted...

To the OP, be wary of Aaron's advice he is part of the Legalists on here.. ABCGrad is a wonderful person, along with Annsni.. and Gina, and Menagerikeeper.. Listen to them..

Ignore Aaron.. he will lead you strait to Legalistic standards, he knows nothing of Grace and freedom.

Sadly, I agree completley with Tiny on this.

 

[Dr. Bob]

This seems to be going downhill fast. Will close the thread to avoid more personal opinions that are hurtful to others.