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Personalized Wedding Vows a Big No No Says Baptist Ethicist

Jerome

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Russell Moore Is Big on Traditional Anglican Vows:

http://www.christianpost.com/news/r...tability-to-the-entire-body-of-christ-129606/

he doesn't allow the couples he marries to write their own vows

the sameness of the marriage vows is what gives the ceremony its charm. "The people who are gathered there who are married ought to be seeing a reenactment, in as much as possible, of what it is that they themselves have vowed to do."

he advised: "A couple starting out a wedding frankly don't know the vows that they need to make without the rest of the body of Christ
 

blessedwife318

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My husband and I wrote are own vows, and I'm very happy with them. We basically paraphrased Eph 5, me doing the wives role and him doing all of the husband's role and then ended with more of the traditional vows, 'for better for worse, for richer for poorer...' and I was very happy with them. Now I can see why sometimes written vows can seem trite compared to the traditional ones but each couple should decide for themselves.
 

annsni

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I appreciate Dr Moore, I entirely disagree with him here.

I agree. Unless God prescribed what we are to say, I think it's up to the culture as to what one does for their marriage ceremony. We didn't write ours. I know many who have. No biggie.
 

Alcott

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It seems to me that if couples 'write their own vows,' they may come up a lot of wacky stuff. Right now, I can only think of one wedding I've attended in which this was done, and that was my sister's and it was officiated by a judge, and it was windy and otherwise noisy there (outdoors), so I couldn't even hear them. So that's why I said "It seems to me..." because I haven't actually heard any wacky stuff like I mentioned first hand-- although knowing my sister and the guy she married.....

I went to a wedding last Saturday, and the 'vows' were the old customary ones... "I,___, take thee, ___, to be my wedded wife/husband; to have and to hold from this day forward; to love and to cherish for better or for worse, for richer-- for poorer, in sickness and in health, till death do us part." But the one who officiated is the one who got in his little items, such as saying, "Now, may the daily conflicts, like which position the toilet seat's left in, be overcome by....." He got few laughs there, and none from me. But if the one who 'does' the wedding gets his own junk in there, is there really any reason the bride and groom can't? I guess it wouldn't bother me if they finely adjusted some of those traditional words to themselves personally.
 

Rolfe

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Personalized Wedding Vows a Big No No Says Baptist Ethicist


I did not know that there was a profession called "Baptist Ethicist". I thought that it was part of the job of pastoring.
 

preachinjesus

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Just as a note, any couple who writes their own vows must have said vows checked by me. I've edited, helpfully, several dozen to make sure they articulate, clearly things in line with what we're trying to accomplish. :)
 

go2church

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Who's wedding is it anyway?

I guess folks are way more protective of ceremony then I am. Short of someone passing out, lighting themselves on fire or being called the wrong name, who remembers what's said at a wedding?

Are there things I don't want to here at a wedding? Sure, but if you don't tell what to say, I won't tell you what to say. You've come to a church, expect me to say church type things, part of the package.
 

Jerome

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annsni

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Just as a note, any couple who writes their own vows must have said vows checked by me. I've edited, helpfully, several dozen to make sure they articulate, clearly things in line with what we're trying to accomplish. :)

That's what my husband has done - gone over the vows with the couple. It is part of the premarital counseling.
 

Rolfe

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I agree. Unless God prescribed what we are to say, I think it's up to the culture as to what one does for their marriage ceremony. We didn't write ours. I know many who have. No biggie.

I could not have said it better. As Go2Church asked, "Who's wedding is it anyway?"
 
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