Here's my situation: I have come to a point in my walk with the Lord where I consider myself a "reformed" Christian. After discussing this with my wife, she made it perfectly clear that she is not interested in finding another, more "reformed", church family. If you were in this situation, how would you cope?
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"Reformed" Baptist in a SB Church
- Thread starter DeadMan
- Start date
Been there, done that, messed up big time. Here's hoping that you will do better than I did.
Stay where you are as long as you can. Hopefully you are already actively serving in your church. If you are then keep doing so, and if not then start doing what you can, and not necessarily service that is visible to everyone. Love Christ's body the way He does. Don't deny what you believe, but don't be obnoxious about it either. Don't get angry if, when discussing your beliefs, someone becomes angry with you. Remember that you are not commanded to convert anyone to reformed theology, but you are commanded to love and honor and serve your brothers and sisters. This is most important - never let anything separate you from those whom Christ loves, those for whom He died, no matter how wrong you think they are.
Stay where you are as long as you can. Hopefully you are already actively serving in your church. If you are then keep doing so, and if not then start doing what you can, and not necessarily service that is visible to everyone. Love Christ's body the way He does. Don't deny what you believe, but don't be obnoxious about it either. Don't get angry if, when discussing your beliefs, someone becomes angry with you. Remember that you are not commanded to convert anyone to reformed theology, but you are commanded to love and honor and serve your brothers and sisters. This is most important - never let anything separate you from those whom Christ loves, those for whom He died, no matter how wrong you think they are.
Gregory Perry Sr.
Active Member
Hey DM...define and explain what you mean by "reformed".I'm just curious.I was saved,baptized,and pretty much "spiritually" raised in IFB churches but I now attend a fairly conservative SBC church that has a pastor that is a very sound doctrinally strong Bible teacher/preacher.I just want to know how you define "reformed".Thanks.
Greg Sr.
Greg Sr.
Gregory Perry Sr.
Active Member
By the way....you won't change your wife by beating her over the head with your new-found "reformedness"(I think I just invented a word..lol).The best avenue to take with her is to pray that the Lord will either change her heart that the two of you would be in "one accord" or change your theology....I just can't buy into the idea of God leading a man into something that would automatically cause strife and discord in a christian marriage.Either God will soften,change and direct her heart.....or you should re-examine your thinking.That is just my opinion.Just PRAY and trust the Lord.
Greg Sr.
Greg Sr.
As I understand it there are Baptist Churches that are into 5 Point Calvinism in the SBC, yet I am not so sure that is intention of the leadership.
Reformed Baptist may well have the full Five Point, that I am not sure of, yet I think that that theology is more common in Presbyterian Churches that take their heritage from Calvin.
Check out http://www.founders.org
These are Calvinistic churches within the SBC. There are some terrific materials there.
These are Calvinistic churches within the SBC. There are some terrific materials there.
All about Grace
New Member
I would focus more on everyday serving & pointing people to Christ and less on theological mysteries that have not been resolved in 2000 years.
GPS said, "...but I now attend a fairly conservative SBC church..."
Uh, Gregory, we are conservative to the core.
DeadMan,
Regardless of your theological position on salvation- who is, who isn't, who can, who can't-
I think we would all agree that we do not know who is, who isn't....so I would encourage you to get involved in the work of the ministry, ie. evangelism, right there at your local church and just be about the business of sharing Christ with everyone.
Uh, Gregory, we are conservative to the core.
DeadMan,
Regardless of your theological position on salvation- who is, who isn't, who can, who can't-
I think we would all agree that we do not know who is, who isn't....so I would encourage you to get involved in the work of the ministry, ie. evangelism, right there at your local church and just be about the business of sharing Christ with everyone.
Gregory Perry Sr.
Active Member
Amen Izzaksdad!!!!(that's my preacher ya'll)I will say that any issues I may have that bring up the use of the word "fairly" as seen above I will discuss only in private with you.Now...as to Deadmans new "theology"....just remember that the Book says such things as,"Whosoever will......"and "For God so loved the WORLD......",etc.! Calvin made some good points but his big mistake was trying to squeeze what is definitely a MYSTERY of our Soveriegn God into a system of "theology"that supposes to answer the UNANSWERABLE.It just can't be done....so I'll have to agree with the wisdom God has given my pastor....get busy,evangelize as much as possible,and try to influence,win and disciple as many as you can to the Lord while there is still time before He returns.NONE OF US are smart or wise enough to play god and suppose who is or isn't destined for heaven OR hell.ONLY God the Father knows that according to His foreknowledge.And oh yeah....keep the Mrs. happy....she is one of those GIFTS you have from that Soveriegn God of ours!! God Bless
Greg Sr.
Greg Sr.
Brother James
New Member
It might help brother if you listened to people online like John Piper, RC Sproul and myriads of other reformed brethren while she is there in the house. The constant preaching of the Word of God will only help your marriage as wel as your spiritual life.
DM,
Put this in the "for what it is worth" file. (Maybe the round file! HA!).
I consider myself of the Founder's persausion. I studied w/Tom Nettles @ MABTS. I was at the meetings when they met originally in Memphis. I am a "Grace Man" (5 pointer). I teach at a Baptist college in the Mid South; Religion and Public Speaking. I have been studying the Doctrines of Grace for over 30 years and am now reading Timothy George's book "The Theology of the Reformers." (I highly recommend it!!!!).
A few things that I have learned that might inform your situation.
First,
it is not my job to make everyone a Calvinist.
Second,
they must "come into the doctrines of Grace" on their own and in their won time.
Thirdly,
a church is more than just a place to worship for some folk. It is a type of "home" where some find friendship and security and other things. And these things take time to build.
Fourth,
if one is reared in a religious tradition, the local church and church membership is that expression of the above security or "home" as it were.
Fifth,
Luther said: "The church reformed and always reforming." The Founder's movement was started at its inception to "reform" the SBC churches. They (we) wanted to bring the Reformed Doctrines of Grace that made up one branch of the SBC historically back to the SBC churches. Therefore, "brighten the corner where you are!" as the old Southern Gospel song declares.
I have been faced with some of the same issues(s) with my wife. But, we are "entrenched Southern Baptists." So, I as you, will "keep moma happy!" And you know, "If moma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy!"
You can bring about some reform where you are. But, be ready for some quizical looks and even some angry responses.
I would encourage you to read Piper, Broadus, Boyce, Manley, JL Dagg, JB Johnson, Jesse Mercer, etc., who by the way are all Southern Baptist. Then you can say that what you b/l puts you in the mainstream of SBC thought at the founding days of the Convention.
I hope this helps!
sdg!
rd
Put this in the "for what it is worth" file. (Maybe the round file! HA!).
I consider myself of the Founder's persausion. I studied w/Tom Nettles @ MABTS. I was at the meetings when they met originally in Memphis. I am a "Grace Man" (5 pointer). I teach at a Baptist college in the Mid South; Religion and Public Speaking. I have been studying the Doctrines of Grace for over 30 years and am now reading Timothy George's book "The Theology of the Reformers." (I highly recommend it!!!!).
A few things that I have learned that might inform your situation.
First,
it is not my job to make everyone a Calvinist.
Second,
they must "come into the doctrines of Grace" on their own and in their won time.
Thirdly,
a church is more than just a place to worship for some folk. It is a type of "home" where some find friendship and security and other things. And these things take time to build.
Fourth,
if one is reared in a religious tradition, the local church and church membership is that expression of the above security or "home" as it were.
Fifth,
Luther said: "The church reformed and always reforming." The Founder's movement was started at its inception to "reform" the SBC churches. They (we) wanted to bring the Reformed Doctrines of Grace that made up one branch of the SBC historically back to the SBC churches. Therefore, "brighten the corner where you are!" as the old Southern Gospel song declares.
I have been faced with some of the same issues(s) with my wife. But, we are "entrenched Southern Baptists." So, I as you, will "keep moma happy!" And you know, "If moma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy!"
You can bring about some reform where you are. But, be ready for some quizical looks and even some angry responses.
I would encourage you to read Piper, Broadus, Boyce, Manley, JL Dagg, JB Johnson, Jesse Mercer, etc., who by the way are all Southern Baptist. Then you can say that what you b/l puts you in the mainstream of SBC thought at the founding days of the Convention.
I hope this helps!
sdg!
rd