It was like that at one time..... then all of AT&T and all the 4 corners moved here & drove up costs..... Then the New Yorkers (mostly tax & spend liberals) came in.....and they killed the goose that layed the golden eggs. Now I just want to get out of here before it kills me.
EW&F, it seems that you are struggling with two mind sets, if I understand your posts correctly.
1. You sincerely want to reach out to those around you, but you are confronted with seemingly endless roadblocks or one kind or another.
2. "Now I just want to get out of here before it kills me."
What does God want you to do? Go or stay?
Brother, it seems that is the real conflict that you are facing today. Either, you put aside those desires to move elsewhere, or you act on them. Doing one thing while longing for another, can, IMO, only lead to further struggles and hardships.
FWIW, I faced a similar situation last summer. Wore out a lot of shoe leather, pacing the floor and asking God what He wanted me to do. And, telling satan to get behind me. It wasn't an easy time, that's for sure and I still have the now healing scars to prove it. It took time, it took prayer, it took patience.
This is kinda hard to put into words, so it's not misunderstood. I reached the point, one afternoon, when I realized I was right where God wanted me to be. None of the other "stuff" mattered. With that came a peace that I can't explain, can't put into words. The go or stay type "decision" was made.
In answer to your question: I'm fortunate to live less than 5 miles from my church. Many members are from the immediate surrounding community. However, we have a some who live from 30 minutes to an hour away. Of those some are quite active in the church. It's interesting to also note how inactive some of our members are who live closer to our church than I do.
Let me pose a challenge to you. Go through whatever it takes to have the conviction that God wants you to go or to stay. Once you have that conviction, no matter how long it takes, then act on it. If you are to go, start taking the steps to go. If you are to stay, do the same thing. Either with a clear understanding that satan will fight you at every opportunity you let him whisper in your ear. Especially the whisper of -- if I had done the opposite, I woudn't be dealing with this xyz now.
If you are to stay, and the Lord leads you, start a Bible study, for example. Look around your community for a physical place to meet. One small start-up church in our area first began meeting in a barn they cleaned out for this purpose. Patio chairs, office chairs, wooden benches, etc. became their pews. Another began meeting in the lunch/break room of a small company after business hours.
Just a couple of pennies for whatever they may be worth to you this morning.