What Are Biblical Grounds for Leaving a Church?

[A Penny Saved]

I'm not a "church shopper." I'm a middle-school girl, newly saved, a child of unbelieving parents, and attending church as a guest of the people who led me to Christ this past summer. I'm only 13, still three years away from getting a drivers license, so it's not as if I can go visiting other churches yet. My parents are downright hostile towards the gospel (and churches like the one I've been attending are likely the reason why) and only let me go to church because "it's better than getting into trouble."

When I ask the folks who are taking me to church all my questions about it, they get upset and question my salvation! But I can't continue attending if my church friends, and even the pastors, can't answer my simplest questions about their beliefs and practices.

Is "online church" okay until I can find another?

What are some BIBLICAL grounds for leaving a church?

Thanks in advance for kind, thoughtful replies!

~ A Penny, Saved but bewildered

 

[evangelist6589]

I'm not a "church shopper." I'm a middle-school girl, newly saved, a child of unbelieving parents, and attending church as a guest of the people who led me to Christ this past summer. I'm only 13, still three years away from getting a drivers license, so it's not as if I can go visiting other churches yet. My parents are downright hostile towards the gospel (and churches like the one I've been attending are likely the reason why) and only let me go to church because "it's better than getting into trouble."

When I ask the folks who are taking me to church all my questions about it, they get upset and question my salvation! But I can't continue attending if my church friends, and even the pastors, can't answer my simplest questions about their beliefs and practices.

Is "online church" okay until I can find another?

What are some BIBLICAL grounds for leaving a church?

Thanks in advance for kind, thoughtful replies!

~ A Penny, Saved but bewildered

A Penny.

I applaud your maturity for your young age. If the church you are attending is teaching false doctrine such as what you mentioned in a previous thread then I would leave it. There are essentials of the faith and those that teach false doctrine needed to be avoided. Here are some scriptures for you to consider.

Galatians 1:8-9
But though we, or an angel from heaven, preach any other gospel unto you than that which we have preached unto you, let him be accursed. As we said before, so say I now again, if any man preach any other gospel unto you than that ye have received, let him be accursed.

Romans 16:17-18
Now I beseech you, brethren, mark them, which cause divisions and offences contrary to the doctrine which ye have learned; and avoid them. For they that are such serve not our Lord Jesus Christ, but their own belly; and by good words and fair speeches deceive the hearts of the simple.

Acts 20:28-31 (NIV)
Keep watch over yourselves and all the flock of which the Holy Spirit has made you overseers. Be shepherds of the church of God, which he bought with his own blood. I know that after I leave, savage wolves will come in among you and will not spare the flock. Even from your own number men will arise and distort the truth in order to draw away disciples after them. So be on your guard! Remember that for three years I never stopped warning each of you night and day with tears.

Matt 7:15-20 (ESV)
Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep's clothing but inwardly are ravenous wolves. You will recognize them by their fruits. Are grapes gathered from thornbushes, or figs from thistles? So, every healthy tree bears good fruit, but the diseased tree bears bad fruit. A healthy tree cannot bear bad fruit, nor can a diseased tree bear good fruit. Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. Thus you will recognize them by their fruits.

Purposes in separating from false teachers

The Christian separates for the following reasons.

1. To maintain the doctrinal integrity of the church (I Timothy 2:6).
2. To protect the sheep or flock from error, which hinders spiritual growth (Acts 20:28; II Peter 2:1-2).

Additional scriptures related to separating from False Teachers

II Corinthians 11:13-15
II John 9-11
II Peter 2:1-3
I Timothy 1:3-7
I Timothy 6:3-5
Deuteronomy 13:1-3

Also I for got to mention

2 Tim 4:1-5
In the presence of God and of Christ Jesus, who will judge the living and the dead, and in view of his appearing and his kingdom, I give you this charge: 2 Preach the word; be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke and encourage—with great patience and careful instruction. 3 For the time will come when people will not put up with sound doctrine. Instead, to suit their own desires, they will gather around them a great number of teachers to say what their itching ears want to hear. 4 They will turn their ears away from the truth and turn aside to myths. 5 But you, keep your head in all situations, endure hardship, do the work of an evangelist, discharge all the duties of your ministry.

A Penny the church you attend does not teach sound doctrine and are preaching messages that the people want to hear and that church should be avoided. I would strongly suggest you keep on reading your Bible and tune into Grace to You by John MacArthur.



John

 

[salzer mtn]

I have learned this through the years, most people go to their own brand of church because they were raised to believe what their church believes. Most church members don't read their bibles hardly at all and they believe every word their preacher say's. Most people will not question their own views and get mad if someone else questions them. Nobody wants to be proven wrong on anything and to be proven wrong would be to admit they are deceived. Penny my advice is study your bible, and pray that the Holy Spirit will lead and guide you into all truth. The Lord promised he would.:wavey:

 

[Revmitchell]

When I ask the folks who are taking me to church all my questions about it, they get upset and question my salvation! But I can't continue attending if my church friends, and even the pastors, can't answer my simplest questions about their beliefs and practices.

That is what is known as spiritual abuse. You need to find another church.

Is "online church" okay until I can find another?

What are some BIBLICAL grounds for leaving a church?

Thanks in advance for kind, thoughtful replies!

~ A Penny, Saved but bewildered

The grounds for leaving a church are not given in scripture. There is a whole bunch that can be said here. Suffice it to say that if you genuinely want to find another bible believing church I imagine that there is one who is willing to pick youth up to get to church. Being that I am from your area if you want assistance in finding another church I will be glad to help. I can do this without you giving up to much info on where you live. Be sure to ask your parents first. I would be glad to speak with them.


I would avoid relying on an online church service much. It can be good for occasionally missing service but you need the fellowship of other believers, especially your age.

 

[ktn4eg]

Penny---

I certainly empathize with your situation.

Having taught young people in your age group for about 10+ years, and having grown up with unsaved parents (I was very close to turning age 20 when I was saved, WAY back in April, 1966.), I can sort of identify to some extent what you most likely must be facing in your situation.

As a teacher, it was drilled into my mind the old adage that, "There's no such thing as a 'Stupid Question'!!! The only thing that's 'Stupid' is/are the question(s) that aren't asked!!!"

With some folks, the very idea that some young person such as you are is asking some older person(s) questions for some reason is perceived by them as being some kind of threat to them; thus they will oftentimes respond to you in a very unkind, harsh way. It's a real shame that sometimes this is the way it happens, but that's (unfortunately for you) what does, in fact, happen when a young person such as you starts asking questions addressed to older people.

As I understand it, this church where you're attending preaches very biblical doctrine. How else would you have come to a personal, saving relationship with Jesus Christ?

Penny, I really feel for you. You are undoubtedly a very wise and mature young lady given your age. I really wish for you the absolute very best as you seek to develop into a very spiritual young person for Jesus Christ.

Here's a Bible verse that I hope will be an encouragement for you:

"Let no man [person] despise [look down upon] thy [your] youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation [in the way you live], in charity [love], in spirit [attitude], in faith, in purity." ----I Timothy 4:12 (KJV, with my own words in brackets)

 

[evangelist6589]

That is what is known as spiritual abuse. You need to find another church.



The grounds for leaving a church are not given in scripture. There is a whole bunch that can be said here. Suffice it to say that if you genuinely want to find another bible believing church I imagine that there is one who is willing to pick youth up to get to church. Being that I am from your area if you want assistance in finding another church I will be glad to help. I can do this without you giving up to much info on where you live. Be sure to ask your parents first. I would be glad to speak with them.


I would avoid relying on an online church service much. It can be good for occasionally missing service but you need the fellowship of other believers, especially your age.

This is good advice. It is Spiritual abuse what she is dealing with and what have dealt with in the past.

 

[Earth Wind and Fire]

I have learned this through the years, most people go to their own brand of church because they were raised to believe what their church believes. Most church members don't read their bibles hardly at all and they believe every word their preacher say's. Most people will not question their own views and get mad if someone else questions them. Nobody wants to be proven wrong on anything and to be proven wrong would be to admit they are deceived. Penny my advice is study your bible, and pray that the Holy Spirit will lead and guide you into all truth. The Lord promised he would.:wavey:

Right on the money..... until they are proven way off the mark by scripture, they will continue down an erroneous. Even after it is evident, most churches still plow the same row.

 

[The Biblicist]

I'm not a "church shopper." I'm a middle-school girl, newly saved, a child of unbelieving parents, and attending church as a guest of the people who led me to Christ this past summer. I'm only 13, still three years away from getting a drivers license, so it's not as if I can go visiting other churches yet. My parents are downright hostile towards the gospel (and churches like the one I've been attending are likely the reason why) and only let me go to church because "it's better than getting into trouble."

When I ask the folks who are taking me to church all my questions about it, they get upset and question my salvation! But I can't continue attending if my church friends, and even the pastors, can't answer my simplest questions about their beliefs and practices.

Is "online church" okay until I can find another?

Church is designed by Christ to be a place where you can ask questions and get answers and grow spiritually. It is a place where you should anticipate coming to and feel at home.

I have found that the Lord can save people even in heretical churches simply through the Word that is read, preached or taught in spite of the spin placed on it by the speakers. So we can find saved people in the Catholic Church, Seventh Day Adventists, Churches of Christ, etc. and other cultic types of Christianity. However, these are places to avoid completely.

There are far more heretical denominations and churches today than good spiritual Biblical congregations. Here are some things you want to look for when considering a church:

1. They must preach that Christ and what he did FOR You is sufficient for your eternal salvation rather than including what you do FOR God.

2. They deny that baptism or the Lord's Supper are essential to be saved or keep saved.

3. They teach that obedience to Christ should be a product of your love for him and is essential for a happy and blessed life.

4. They believe the Bible is final authority for all faith and practice.

5. Their sermons and lessons are Bible based with Bible content and not merely about the Bible or entertaining stories.

6. There should be a sense of Spiritual joy and friendliness in the congregation to each other and especially to visitors.

7. They don't pressure you to do anything but encourage you and insist you seek the Spirit's leadership and confirmation through His word to your soul and grant you spiritual liberty.

Now concerning your question about attending or leaving your present church. If that church at least meets the first three qualifications above then go speak to the Pastor and tell him your concerns and ask for prayer.

If this chuch does not meet the first three qualifications then immediately withdraw yourself and ask the Lord to lead you to a congregation that does. The intenet might provide you a directory where these seven essentials may be listed and seek out such a church.

If you do leave be prepared for a visit by that Pastor and persons who have been taking you to church and expect to face some kind of disciplinary reaction or threat if you do not return.

Keep up your Bible reading and prayers vigilantly throughout this time.

Submit to Proverbs 3:5-7 prayerfully and carefully and the Lord will lead you in the path you ought to go.

5 Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
6 In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
7 ¶ Be not wise in thine own eyes: fear the LORD, and depart from evil.

 

[thisnumbersdisconnected]

Penny, you can get a whole lot of words from us by asking this question, and you have. I believe you are being led by the Holy Spirit to question what you are hearing, and you need to listen to Him.

I think the best suggestion you've gotten here is from Revmitchell, who, being close, can actually help you. Consider PMing him and letting God take it from there.

 

[evangelist6589]

Penny, you can get a whole lot of words from us by asking this question, and you have. I believe you are being led by the Holy Spirit to question what you are hearing, and you need to listen to Him.

I think the best suggestion you've gotten here is from Revmitchell, who, being close, can actually help you. Consider PMing him and letting God take it from there.

It was good, however sometimes one can only rely on a online teaching service. She may be in a position where she cannot go to another church due to her age and John MacArthur has said many times that Grace to You exists for people in such a predicament.

 

[glazer1972]

I would try to find another church near you that has a bus ministry. We'll pray for you.