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Who's The Boss?
- Thread starter OLD SARGE
- Start date
I don't know if you are this Dr. Ronald Schultz of whom you keep posting sermons from or just someone who shares his teachings.
This idea that a husband is a "boss" lording over and controlling the wife like sergeant screaming at, shoving, and cursing out a bunch of new 18-year-old new privates in the military doesn't set well with me. And I've heard this "marriage is like the military" teaching for years.
And it's always from the entitled and privileged position of the husband alone. He gets to be the "boss", the "commander", and outranks his wife every day in worth to the marriage and family and worth in general because.....well, God said so.....didn't he?
My beloved father was in the Air Force. The flag that draped his coffin is folded and is displayed on my piano.
He told me so many wonderful stories of his time serving his country and I wish I had gotten him to write them down. One in particular was of his first day. He and the other 18-19 year olds road the bus together to the boot camp. There, they all got a buzz cut and no longer recognized each other and he said, yes, that to them at the time was a little scary.
He said that the rest of the day was learning how to make their beds to perfection and getting screamed at and cussed at a frightening decibel level. He said that the first night, that they were only too glad to go to bed at 8:00 pm and there was nothing but silence. Well, nothing but the quite noise of a room full of 18-19 year old boys crying.
I understand the necessity of teaching soldiers who are all expendable and of lesser value than the bigger picture of the mission - I get why one has to beat them down until they fear making a mistake.
But Old Sarge that's not wife. Your one-sided teaching you've posted starts out with the wrong word in the title - Boss.
The Bible says that husbands are to be the head, like Jesus Christ is the head of the church. And how is Jesus the head? It isn't how you describe being "disciplined".
You or the author stated being "lower than a dog" in basic training learning to obey. And that you or he took on more "discipline" just to earn benefits of free movie tickets.
That isn't how wives should be treated either.
A head is not a boss. A wife is not lower than a dog and forced to obey.
These kinds of "teachings" always break my heart. Especially when I grew up in a household with a MANLY man as a father, a father who was the head, and who treated my mother like she was the most precious thing in the world to him and a woman whom he would never view as "lower than a dog" and the woman he should be the boss over.
He was her Christ-like head, not her military boss.
This idea that a husband is a "boss" lording over and controlling the wife like sergeant screaming at, shoving, and cursing out a bunch of new 18-year-old new privates in the military doesn't set well with me. And I've heard this "marriage is like the military" teaching for years.
And it's always from the entitled and privileged position of the husband alone. He gets to be the "boss", the "commander", and outranks his wife every day in worth to the marriage and family and worth in general because.....well, God said so.....didn't he?
My beloved father was in the Air Force. The flag that draped his coffin is folded and is displayed on my piano.
He told me so many wonderful stories of his time serving his country and I wish I had gotten him to write them down. One in particular was of his first day. He and the other 18-19 year olds road the bus together to the boot camp. There, they all got a buzz cut and no longer recognized each other and he said, yes, that to them at the time was a little scary.
He said that the rest of the day was learning how to make their beds to perfection and getting screamed at and cussed at a frightening decibel level. He said that the first night, that they were only too glad to go to bed at 8:00 pm and there was nothing but silence. Well, nothing but the quite noise of a room full of 18-19 year old boys crying.
I understand the necessity of teaching soldiers who are all expendable and of lesser value than the bigger picture of the mission - I get why one has to beat them down until they fear making a mistake.
But Old Sarge that's not wife. Your one-sided teaching you've posted starts out with the wrong word in the title - Boss.
The Bible says that husbands are to be the head, like Jesus Christ is the head of the church. And how is Jesus the head? It isn't how you describe being "disciplined".
You or the author stated being "lower than a dog" in basic training learning to obey. And that you or he took on more "discipline" just to earn benefits of free movie tickets.
That isn't how wives should be treated either.
A head is not a boss. A wife is not lower than a dog and forced to obey.
These kinds of "teachings" always break my heart. Especially when I grew up in a household with a MANLY man as a father, a father who was the head, and who treated my mother like she was the most precious thing in the world to him and a woman whom he would never view as "lower than a dog" and the woman he should be the boss over.
He was her Christ-like head, not her military boss.
Ascetic X
Well-Known Member
“Your power will lie in how well you learn to meet the needs of your husband through your submission.”
This sermon makes it seem like the wife exists only to please and obey her husband.
I wish I would have submitted a lot more to my godly wife’s household rules and overall wisdom. Dearly beloved Andrea was right about everything. She was five years older and more sophisticated and disciplined than I was. I was sometimes wrong. I had much to learn from Andrea, whose name means womanly. She was the virtuous Proverbs 31 lady. I called Andrea my perfect wife.
A husband should not be the boss of his wife. Most situations call for cooperation, not inflexible leadership. I cannot think of a single time in my marriage of 21 blessed years when I had to seize control and demand obedience from my wife. Our lives flowed smoothly. We came to reasonable agreements and rarely had any real conflict.
She liked the air conditioning to be on high in the summer. I told her I froze in the winter and did not want to freeze in the summer, too. But instead of bossing her around and demanding that she turn the air down, I just put on a sweater.
The idea of marriage being a battle of wills never seemed very relevant to us. I used to joke about how she needed to submit, preferably in silence. But we just laughed about it. She could be a bit demanding at times, but it was because I was a bit barbaric and needed her more civilized style.
I liked to go barefoot outside on our property. She wanted me to wear shoes. I went barefoot. I disappointed her, but we did not fuss and fight about such things.
I never saw any need to assert my will as the final authority. We just came to mutually acceptable conclusions all the time. Perhaps our sweet relationship was exceptional.
She was one in a million, the best Christian I ever knew. She did me good and not evil all the days of her precious life.
I told God I will need an infinity of eternities to give Him all the praise and thanks He deserves for bringing us together.
This sermon makes it seem like the wife exists only to please and obey her husband.
I wish I would have submitted a lot more to my godly wife’s household rules and overall wisdom. Dearly beloved Andrea was right about everything. She was five years older and more sophisticated and disciplined than I was. I was sometimes wrong. I had much to learn from Andrea, whose name means womanly. She was the virtuous Proverbs 31 lady. I called Andrea my perfect wife.
A husband should not be the boss of his wife. Most situations call for cooperation, not inflexible leadership. I cannot think of a single time in my marriage of 21 blessed years when I had to seize control and demand obedience from my wife. Our lives flowed smoothly. We came to reasonable agreements and rarely had any real conflict.
She liked the air conditioning to be on high in the summer. I told her I froze in the winter and did not want to freeze in the summer, too. But instead of bossing her around and demanding that she turn the air down, I just put on a sweater.
The idea of marriage being a battle of wills never seemed very relevant to us. I used to joke about how she needed to submit, preferably in silence. But we just laughed about it. She could be a bit demanding at times, but it was because I was a bit barbaric and needed her more civilized style.
I liked to go barefoot outside on our property. She wanted me to wear shoes. I went barefoot. I disappointed her, but we did not fuss and fight about such things.
I never saw any need to assert my will as the final authority. We just came to mutually acceptable conclusions all the time. Perhaps our sweet relationship was exceptional.
She was one in a million, the best Christian I ever knew. She did me good and not evil all the days of her precious life.
I told God I will need an infinity of eternities to give Him all the praise and thanks He deserves for bringing us together.
I knew Scarlett would go off on this and none of what she was saying was the intent. However, I do not think anything I would say would calm her down or she would care. My wife is an independent and strong woman and yet, I make the deciding vote if we are tied on an issue. Men have date of rank. She handles the finances because she is better at it than me. Hence, we are retired debt free. The term huptaso is a military term. The boot camp reference had nothing to do with women.
Anyway, Salty go ahead and delete my account. I no longer feel that I am an asset to the groups. I have other roads to travel.
Anyway, Salty go ahead and delete my account. I no longer feel that I am an asset to the groups. I have other roads to travel.
Do not leave. I will leave you be and you won't hear from me again.
I did not " go off" nor am I behaving in a manner in which I need to "calm down". I spoke respectfully to you and addressed what you said. I am sorry that you "knew" I would disagree.
But I will leave you alone. I don't want a member to leave because of me just because we disagree.
I did not " go off" nor am I behaving in a manner in which I need to "calm down". I spoke respectfully to you and addressed what you said. I am sorry that you "knew" I would disagree.
But I will leave you alone. I don't want a member to leave because of me just because we disagree.
The wife is called by God to honor and respect her husband and his authority, BUIT, the Husband is commanded to be worthy of that, to treat her as Christ does His own Church